I have entered the stage of grieving that is known as the Theme Park of Constant Mood Swings ( Read more... )

Well, I'm not dead. Yet.

Christ. On a pony. This week has been so long I thought I would never see the end of it.

Do you even know what happens when you have insomnia so bad it keeps you from sleeping even though you have taken four sleeping pills? Oh. My. God ( Read more... )

I am freezing. FREEZING. I have turned the heat up twice in an hour, and I'm still frozen ( Read more... )

I've been on the edge of a real tearass tweeker all day. I hate this random panic attack shit. For the last couple months I've been okay, but it's starting to slip again, partly because I'm finally coming down off the stress over Christmas, I think. My brain is finally processing everything ( Read more... )

Mom's going under. Dad's helping her as much as he can, and she's as comfortable as drugs can make her, but it's still not a pretty sight. She hasn't eaten in days, and hasn't been able to swallow much more than a few sips of water since Monday. It won't be long, now, not long at all, which is both the blessing and the curse of it ( Read more... )

Why am I having a panic attack today of all days? Why ( Read more... )

Hooo-kay ( Read more... )

There comes a point at which you just have to wonder if the world will ever quit throwing you around. I'm seasick from riding this crap out. I don't feel good. For two weeks I've been panicky and tense for no real reason, and it's only gotten worse the past few days. I have no appetite, which is rare for me. I actually feel rather ill ( Read more... )

There is no winning in this business.

I can either write porn-for-pay, and get paid what amounts to $10-$20 an hour for stories that are a guaranteed sell but do not generally excite me or test my creativity; or I can write "real" erotica, entertain myself a little more, and make maybe half that, and maybe gain some respect, if my stories sell; or ( Read more... )

Had a day full of Suck yesterday and the day before.

( The birdies. )