Fic: Coming Home 39/?
Author: PABWECG (aka Patricia)
Title: Coming Home
Genre/Type: Romance
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid, Luke/Noah, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Bob, assorted little people, possibly others
Warnings: None really, except some Nuke intimacy
Summary: Luke and Noah moved to L.A. in the Summer of 2009 for Noah to do his last year of school with an internship of sorts (no Mason, no blindness, etc. Everything else in their history has happened). Reid arrived, temporarily, at Memorial in August 2010.
It’s now the fall.
Thank you Slayerkitty for being my beta!!!
Previous Chapters: 1/ 2/ 3/ 4/ 5/ 6/ 7/ 8/ 9/ 10/ 11/ 12/ 13/ 14/ 15/ 16/ 17/ 18/ 19/ 20/ 21/ 22/ 23/ 24/ 25/ 26/ 27/ 28/ 29/ 30/ 31/ 32/ 33/ 34/ 35/ 36/ 37/ 38/
Chapter 39
Here they all were, on the floor of Katie’s living room. Stephen sat, legs stretched out, his back leaning against the couch. Katie was sitting beside an armchair, her head leaning against it. Opposite her, Luke sat cross-legged and leaning back against the other one, the fingers of his right hand playing lightly along those of Reid’s left; Reid, for his part was stretched out full on the floor, Jacob sound asleep on top of him.
Jacob’s head was turned in Luke’s direction, his thumb in his mouth, and his other hand gripping Reid’s shirt. Luke watched as Reid’s free hand made soft circles on the little boy’s back.
Tonight hadn’t turned out at all like he’d thought it might.
The living room had just now suddenly gone quiet. Minutes before, Jacob had been a live wire, laughing and squealing as he’d walked back and forth between him and Katie on the floor. That was a scene he had been a part of many times before with his own siblings and so it had been second nature for him to pick Jacob up and rub his nose into that ticklish spot between his chin and shoulder, before placing him wobbling back down on the floor; he would turn around and head back to his mother, where she’d coo and give him a big squeeze.
Reid and Stephen, side by side on the couch, had been regaling them with many tales of their younger days in med-school together. And then Jacob had toddled on over to Reid and lifted his arms up towards him. Reid had picked up the little “drool monster” and settled him against his chest, where he’d played with Reid’s nose and eyes and squirmed a little, trying not to let himself get sleepy; but after a few minutes, he’d let his head rest on Reid’s shoulder and before they all knew it, he had fallen asleep. After several minutes Reid had settled onto the floor next to Luke, lowering himself and Jacob back to rest. Now everyone was tired, taking his or her cue from the slumbering little boy.
Dinner had gone pretty well, Luke thought.
He’d been nervous, wondering what kind of impression he was making on Reid’s good-looking, obviously intelligent, and seemingly very kind best friend. Luke had felt, suddenly, very young, and again he’d begun to doubt himself, wondering what someone like Reid could see in him - young and inexperienced, and messed-up. But he’d seen none of that doubt in Reid. He’d continued to catch Luke’s eye with that look of awe and admiration that always took Luke by surprise. This was still so new, being in a relationship with someone who didn’t patronize him, but instead treated him as if he deserved respect, as if he’d earned it, as if he was an adult.
As the conversations had gone on around the table, it had become obvious to Luke that Reid had told Stephen a lot about him and about them - and had done so with pride. The red-haired man had asked questions of genuine interest about Luke’s foundation and the novel he was writing.
“So, do you have everything you need at the cottage?” Luke now asked, gently wrapping his fingers around Reid’s.
“Oh yes.” Stephen replied. “Everything I could want and more; Ms. Walsh seemed to make sure that everything was well in order.”
“Yes. That’s Grandmother.” Luke said with a wry smile.
“Right.” Stephen smiled back at him. “I forgot she was your grandmother.” And he continued to hold Luke’s gaze. “She seems quite the woman.”
“She is. I don’t know how I would have survived without her.” As Stephen looked at him kindly, but expectedly, he continued. “Adolescence was a …rather difficult time for me. And she was determined to see me make it through - whole, healthy and happy.”
“That’s good. Most of us need someone like that in our lives at one time or another.” Luke nodded his agreement. “For me it was my older brother, well one of them…”
“Stephen comes from a large Catholic family…ten kids.” Reid said with a look of horror, which Stephen ignored.
“Anyway, we all got along pretty well, for the most part…”
“They actually did.” Reid interrupted again. “I think Stephen is the only person I know who had a normal childhood.” Luke laughed quietly.
“But my brother Bill just sort of got me,” Stephen continued. “It’s funny, because we didn’t do a whole lot of talking; he was just there for me, we enjoyed being together, and that was important for me, especially when I was a teenager. Coming out as a Catholic boy was…well, not easy. But Bill just silently let me know I was okay. It’s hard to explain.”
Luke nodded his head, understanding. “I get it.” And they were quiet for a moment.
Katie spoke into the silence. “So Stephen, have Bob and Reid managed to convince you yet…to come to Oakdale I mean.”
Stephen smiled and bobbed his head back and forth just a bit. “Let’s say they make a good case, but…”
“But they are asking you move half-way across the country, to a small mid-western town…very different from Boston, a much smaller hospital…” Katie nodded her beautiful smile at him.
“Yeah and…well, there’s someone back home…someone I love.”
She tilted her head and smiled again. “Oh, that’s sweet. And yeah,” she added understanding. “That’s important, obviously. Would he consider coming with you?”
“I don’t know.” He looked down and then back up. “Probably, but we’ve only been together for about four months, so I’m not sure.”
“You love him; does he love you?” She asked.
“She does this with everyone, I’m afraid.” Reid said quietly. “She loves to see a happy-ending, she just can’t help it.”
“Reid.” Luke admonished quietly, and Reid turned his head slightly, looking up and catching his eye.
“That’s okay Luke.” She responded. “He’s just a grump who doesn’t believe in happy endings.”
“That’s not true.” Reid quietly grumped, kissing the top of Jacob's head softly.
“I’m afraid she’s got your number, Reid.” Stephen said. “But to answer your question, yeah he loves me.”
“What’s his name?” She asked. “What’s he like?”
“His name is Kyle, and he’s amazing. He’s young - only twenty-seven…a musician. He’s generous and quiet…serious.” Katie had her chin in her hands and she was smiling at him.
“He sounds wonderful.” She said and he nodded.
Luke saw Reid shift, pulling a pillow under his head and adjusting Jacob so that he was more comfortably settled; when Jacob stirred a bit, he subconsciously rubbed his back, while his hand entwined fingers with Luke’s. Luke watched him with a smile. He didn’t think Reid had had much experience with babies, but this interaction with Jacob seemed to come intuitively. Luke thought that maybe he could watch him like this all day.
It suddenly dawned on him that he wanted this - Reid, babies, all that. That thought kinda freaked him out, and he looked away briefly and swallowed. Then he looked back down at the beautiful blue-eyed man, whose eyes were closed and whose head was slightly tilted, as if he was taking in the smell of the baby. And another realization hit him: he’d never wanted that with Noah. His brow furrowed as he combed his memories. Never? No, when he was younger he’d assumed and looked forward to the day when he would be a father. With Noah, he hadn’t consciously put that aside; he’d just never pictured it. Not once. He’d pictured happily-ever-after; marriage even, but never this, never children. And how strange is that? That should have been a clue. Luke Snyder picturing a future for himself…a future that didn’t include children?
As he was thinking, his eyes suddenly found Reid’s upon him. A smile grew and his heart raced. He felt shy, as if Reid could read his thoughts. And perhaps he could, sort of. He watched as Reid’s lips parted in a small surprise, looked down and away and then back up into Luke’s eyes. And Reid exhaled, and his eyes seemed to express that he had no answers but wasn’t running away from whatever the question was. And he lifted Luke’s hand to his lips and laid it there, closing his eyes, gently mouthing Luke’s fingers for a few moments, before opening his eyes to Luke’s again. Luke’s own lips had parted and a small smile of gratitude and amazement lay on them.
Luke laced his fingers into Reid’s once more and let them rest together on Reid’s thigh; and Reid gave him a look that calmed him. It told him that, just like everything so far, they would figure all this out together. Whatever this was or was going to become, there was no need to worry. Again, no words were spoken but there was an us. Luke closed his eyes and just let himself rest in the comfort of this unspoken calm.
Time went on and it began to get late, conversation more sporadic and quiet. When Stephen began to yawn, Reid smirked at him. “We keeping you up, old man?”
“Hey, watch it.” Stephen responded. “Besides I’ve only got three years on you.” Reid laughed when he saw his friend yawn once more. “I am tired though, and you and Dr. Hughes are going to torture me with more papers, and plans and details tomorrow.” He rolled his eyes. “God, give me meetings and people any day.” He looked at Reid, comfortably lounging with the sleeping baby. “You look like you’re just dieing to get up and drive me back.”
“Um-hmm,” Reid said sleepily. “Give me a minute and I’ll wake-up just fine.”
“I could take you.” Luke spoke up. “I’ve got to go anyway.” Reid opened his eyes, looking noticeably disappointed. “Besides, I’m the only one who hasn’t had anything to drink…except Jacob, of course.”
Stephen looked between Reid and Luke, then said. “Okay. If you’re sure you’re ready to go.”
“Yeah.” Luke got up and put his hands in his pockets, rocking onto his heels.
Katie got up and removed Jacob from Reid’s arms. “I’ll just put him to bed…” When he looked confused, she said, “so you can say a proper goodnight to Luke.”
“Oh, right.” And Luke pulled him to his feet where they stood close.
Stephen began carrying glasses to the kitchen, giving them some alone time.
Luke stood close to him, looking into his eyes. “You’ve had a good couple of days, haven’t you?”
“I have.” Reid nodded. “And I’ve missed you.”
Luke smiled at him, licking his lower lip. Reid put his arms around his waist and pulled him flush against him. “Will you stay tomorrow night?”
“Don’t you have that dinner-meeting with the board of directors at Bob and Kim’s?”
Reid nodded, and his eyes told Luke that he still wanted him to come. “I don’t think it’ll go that late - nine or ten.” He looked into Luke’s eyes. “But I suppose it could be later, so if you’d rather…”
Luke shook his head. “I’d love to stay with you. Call me when you’re done.”
“Katie’ll be here if you just want to come over earlier and…wait for me?”
Luke grinned at him, pulling him close for a kiss finally. When they pulled back, he said, “I’ve been wanting to kiss you again all evening.” Reid pulled him back in and kissed him more deeply. His one hand ran up Luke’s back and into his hair, and his tongue gently parted Luke’s lips, causing Luke to break the kiss and pant softly into Reid’s mouth, closing his eyes. Reid ran a thumb gently over Luke’s cheekbone and over his jaw, down to his chin. Luke opened his eyes to find Reid’s warm eyes on him.
Driving down the main road out of Oakdale-proper, and towards his grandmother’s cottage, Luke felt like he had a million questions he wanted to ask; but he asked none.
“Do you love him?” Stephen broke him out of his thoughts.
“Hmm?” Luke looked briefly over at him. “Um.” He was taken aback by this sudden, very forthright question.
“I’m sorry. Does this seem very sudden? I don’t mean to…I guess I have no right to ask. That’s between you and Reid but…”
“No, that’s okay. You love him, and you’re protective of him.” Luke nodded at him. “And I’ve only known Reid for a month and a half. I understand. I’d feel the same way if some woman came waltzing into my best friend’s life so suddenly this way.”
Stephen nodded. “Reid is…well, he can give the impression that he’s tough and…that nothing can hurt him, but…”
“But that’s not true…I know.”
“Strange, for years I looked up to Reid, was always in-love with him really.” Luke nodded imperceptibly, and swallowed. “But all along, he was this little kid too…he was only nineteen when we met, and I guess I’ve always sort of been his protector, in a way. And all these years, he’s only really been casual with most of the men he’s dated.”
“But not when he was with you.” Luke couldn’t stop the words from escaping.
“No, not with me; I guess that’s why I ask. I’m not sure if it makes sense to you. With me, Reid was never at risk of having his heart broken, since he had mine in his hands. And with the other men, Reid was so casual that I knew they couldn’t hurt him, not really.” Luke looked over at him, understanding his meaning now. “But with you,” Stephen continued. “Reid really cares about you. His heart’s in it. I just don’t want to see him hurt. I know that’s the risk you take when you let people get close to you, but…”
“But Reid doesn’t do that very often.” Luke finished the thought for him, catching Stephen’s eye again and seeing that they both understood.
“But he has with you.” And Stephen looked at him with a small smile that was hard to decipher. “You may only have known him a short while, but he’s let you in closer than he ever has me.”
Luke doubted this, remembering the intimate way the two slept together on the couch earlier in the day. “Are you sure?” he asked. “The way he talks about you, the way you are together - he seems to trust you completely.”
“I think he does…and he has every reason to. But you…” Stephen looked thoughtfully at him. “There’s something about you…I’ve seen the way he looks at you, the way he talks about you…you’ve disarmed him.” Luke looked confused. “There was always one final layer of armor surrounding his heart…that’s why it didn’t work out between us…he could never let it down, as much as he wanted to. But with you…he did. And yes, it happened quickly, but it happened.”
Luke was quiet, letting Stephen’s words sink in. “I do love him.” He finally said.
As they drove, Luke realized that was the first time he’d said the words out loud. Why now, and why to him? “I haven’t told him.” And he laughed quietly. “Actually, I’ve never told anyone. Is it strange that I’m telling you? Practically a stranger to me, and yet not a stranger. And you, of all people.”
“What do you mean, me of all people?”
Luke thought he sounded slightly hurt. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. I just mean…well, before I met you, I saw you twice...you and Reid, that is.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, and before that, whenever Reid spoke of you I could tell how much he loves you…I couldn’t help but be jealous.” Stephen smiled softly at the younger man. “And when I arrived at Katie’s place today…the way you guys were…his head in your lap…I’m ashamed to say that I almost left.”
“Were you angry?”
“No. But I was jealous; jealous of the time you’ve had with him. And the closeness. And I was scared, I still am I guess.”
“Scared of what?”
“I’ve never felt like this. It’s strange because I did love Noah, but it was never like this. I trust Reid, but I’m still scared, because he moves me like no one else ever has, and…well, I was going to say ‘what if I lose him?’ but I’m not sure I have him. And you do, you have him. Don’t get me wrong; I know you love Kyle, and that you and Reid aren’t together like that anymore. But as his friend, you have him, his trust and his loyalty. And I’m not sure…do I have him? Sometimes I feel so sure with him, but it’s all so new, for both of us…so being around the two of you, I guess it brought up some insecurities for me.”
They drove in silence the rest of the way, and Luke felt embarrassed. Why did he always feel the need to spill his guts to everyone? Noah had always hated the way he would share his personal feelings with anyone - but this wasn’t just anyone. Stephen seemed to encourage this kind of confidence. He could see why Reid would have opened up to him, after all those years living shut off from everyone. But he was embarrassed at having shared such personal things, and with Stephen before having said them to Reid even.
He pulled into the driveway of his grandmother’s cottage and Stephen turned to face him. “I hope you’re not embarrassed.” He said.
“How did you know?”
“I’m pretty good at reading people, as are you. But, I’ve had a bit more practice…I’ve got a few years on you.” Luke laughed quietly. “I get the impression that you open your heart pretty easily…and maybe have had it stomped on a few times because of that.” Luke nodded. “Anyway, one of the people I’m very good at reading…is Reid. And he doesn’t open his heart easily, but he has to you. And in a way he’s never done before, not even with me. I know things are new between you two, but I would trust your instincts, especially those feelings you have when he looks at you.”
Luke knew what Stephen was talking about. When Reid looked at him, all of the worries and questions of his life simply fled. All his challenges felt conquerable. And he felt a peace that was so deep come over him.
“That’s how I feel with Kyle. As much as I love Reid, and I do and I always will, Kyle’s love is different…it’s sure and it’s mine. And I knew he loved me even before he said it.” Luke met Stephen’s eyes and saw warmth there. “I want Reid to be happy, and I’ve never seen him so happy as he is right now, Luke. And I know that it’s because of you. I have no doubt of that.”
next part/
Title: Coming Home
Genre/Type: Romance
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid, Luke/Noah, Lily/Holden, Casey, Katie, Bob, assorted little people, possibly others
Warnings: None really, except some Nuke intimacy
Summary: Luke and Noah moved to L.A. in the Summer of 2009 for Noah to do his last year of school with an internship of sorts (no Mason, no blindness, etc. Everything else in their history has happened). Reid arrived, temporarily, at Memorial in August 2010.
It’s now the fall.
Thank you Slayerkitty for being my beta!!!
Previous Chapters: 1/ 2/ 3/ 4/ 5/ 6/ 7/ 8/ 9/ 10/ 11/ 12/ 13/ 14/ 15/ 16/ 17/ 18/ 19/ 20/ 21/ 22/ 23/ 24/ 25/ 26/ 27/ 28/ 29/ 30/ 31/ 32/ 33/ 34/ 35/ 36/ 37/ 38/
Chapter 39
Here they all were, on the floor of Katie’s living room. Stephen sat, legs stretched out, his back leaning against the couch. Katie was sitting beside an armchair, her head leaning against it. Opposite her, Luke sat cross-legged and leaning back against the other one, the fingers of his right hand playing lightly along those of Reid’s left; Reid, for his part was stretched out full on the floor, Jacob sound asleep on top of him.
Jacob’s head was turned in Luke’s direction, his thumb in his mouth, and his other hand gripping Reid’s shirt. Luke watched as Reid’s free hand made soft circles on the little boy’s back.
Tonight hadn’t turned out at all like he’d thought it might.
The living room had just now suddenly gone quiet. Minutes before, Jacob had been a live wire, laughing and squealing as he’d walked back and forth between him and Katie on the floor. That was a scene he had been a part of many times before with his own siblings and so it had been second nature for him to pick Jacob up and rub his nose into that ticklish spot between his chin and shoulder, before placing him wobbling back down on the floor; he would turn around and head back to his mother, where she’d coo and give him a big squeeze.
Reid and Stephen, side by side on the couch, had been regaling them with many tales of their younger days in med-school together. And then Jacob had toddled on over to Reid and lifted his arms up towards him. Reid had picked up the little “drool monster” and settled him against his chest, where he’d played with Reid’s nose and eyes and squirmed a little, trying not to let himself get sleepy; but after a few minutes, he’d let his head rest on Reid’s shoulder and before they all knew it, he had fallen asleep. After several minutes Reid had settled onto the floor next to Luke, lowering himself and Jacob back to rest. Now everyone was tired, taking his or her cue from the slumbering little boy.
Dinner had gone pretty well, Luke thought.
He’d been nervous, wondering what kind of impression he was making on Reid’s good-looking, obviously intelligent, and seemingly very kind best friend. Luke had felt, suddenly, very young, and again he’d begun to doubt himself, wondering what someone like Reid could see in him - young and inexperienced, and messed-up. But he’d seen none of that doubt in Reid. He’d continued to catch Luke’s eye with that look of awe and admiration that always took Luke by surprise. This was still so new, being in a relationship with someone who didn’t patronize him, but instead treated him as if he deserved respect, as if he’d earned it, as if he was an adult.
As the conversations had gone on around the table, it had become obvious to Luke that Reid had told Stephen a lot about him and about them - and had done so with pride. The red-haired man had asked questions of genuine interest about Luke’s foundation and the novel he was writing.
“So, do you have everything you need at the cottage?” Luke now asked, gently wrapping his fingers around Reid’s.
“Oh yes.” Stephen replied. “Everything I could want and more; Ms. Walsh seemed to make sure that everything was well in order.”
“Yes. That’s Grandmother.” Luke said with a wry smile.
“Right.” Stephen smiled back at him. “I forgot she was your grandmother.” And he continued to hold Luke’s gaze. “She seems quite the woman.”
“She is. I don’t know how I would have survived without her.” As Stephen looked at him kindly, but expectedly, he continued. “Adolescence was a …rather difficult time for me. And she was determined to see me make it through - whole, healthy and happy.”
“That’s good. Most of us need someone like that in our lives at one time or another.” Luke nodded his agreement. “For me it was my older brother, well one of them…”
“Stephen comes from a large Catholic family…ten kids.” Reid said with a look of horror, which Stephen ignored.
“Anyway, we all got along pretty well, for the most part…”
“They actually did.” Reid interrupted again. “I think Stephen is the only person I know who had a normal childhood.” Luke laughed quietly.
“But my brother Bill just sort of got me,” Stephen continued. “It’s funny, because we didn’t do a whole lot of talking; he was just there for me, we enjoyed being together, and that was important for me, especially when I was a teenager. Coming out as a Catholic boy was…well, not easy. But Bill just silently let me know I was okay. It’s hard to explain.”
Luke nodded his head, understanding. “I get it.” And they were quiet for a moment.
Katie spoke into the silence. “So Stephen, have Bob and Reid managed to convince you yet…to come to Oakdale I mean.”
Stephen smiled and bobbed his head back and forth just a bit. “Let’s say they make a good case, but…”
“But they are asking you move half-way across the country, to a small mid-western town…very different from Boston, a much smaller hospital…” Katie nodded her beautiful smile at him.
“Yeah and…well, there’s someone back home…someone I love.”
She tilted her head and smiled again. “Oh, that’s sweet. And yeah,” she added understanding. “That’s important, obviously. Would he consider coming with you?”
“I don’t know.” He looked down and then back up. “Probably, but we’ve only been together for about four months, so I’m not sure.”
“You love him; does he love you?” She asked.
“She does this with everyone, I’m afraid.” Reid said quietly. “She loves to see a happy-ending, she just can’t help it.”
“Reid.” Luke admonished quietly, and Reid turned his head slightly, looking up and catching his eye.
“That’s okay Luke.” She responded. “He’s just a grump who doesn’t believe in happy endings.”
“That’s not true.” Reid quietly grumped, kissing the top of Jacob's head softly.
“I’m afraid she’s got your number, Reid.” Stephen said. “But to answer your question, yeah he loves me.”
“What’s his name?” She asked. “What’s he like?”
“His name is Kyle, and he’s amazing. He’s young - only twenty-seven…a musician. He’s generous and quiet…serious.” Katie had her chin in her hands and she was smiling at him.
“He sounds wonderful.” She said and he nodded.
Luke saw Reid shift, pulling a pillow under his head and adjusting Jacob so that he was more comfortably settled; when Jacob stirred a bit, he subconsciously rubbed his back, while his hand entwined fingers with Luke’s. Luke watched him with a smile. He didn’t think Reid had had much experience with babies, but this interaction with Jacob seemed to come intuitively. Luke thought that maybe he could watch him like this all day.
It suddenly dawned on him that he wanted this - Reid, babies, all that. That thought kinda freaked him out, and he looked away briefly and swallowed. Then he looked back down at the beautiful blue-eyed man, whose eyes were closed and whose head was slightly tilted, as if he was taking in the smell of the baby. And another realization hit him: he’d never wanted that with Noah. His brow furrowed as he combed his memories. Never? No, when he was younger he’d assumed and looked forward to the day when he would be a father. With Noah, he hadn’t consciously put that aside; he’d just never pictured it. Not once. He’d pictured happily-ever-after; marriage even, but never this, never children. And how strange is that? That should have been a clue. Luke Snyder picturing a future for himself…a future that didn’t include children?
As he was thinking, his eyes suddenly found Reid’s upon him. A smile grew and his heart raced. He felt shy, as if Reid could read his thoughts. And perhaps he could, sort of. He watched as Reid’s lips parted in a small surprise, looked down and away and then back up into Luke’s eyes. And Reid exhaled, and his eyes seemed to express that he had no answers but wasn’t running away from whatever the question was. And he lifted Luke’s hand to his lips and laid it there, closing his eyes, gently mouthing Luke’s fingers for a few moments, before opening his eyes to Luke’s again. Luke’s own lips had parted and a small smile of gratitude and amazement lay on them.
Luke laced his fingers into Reid’s once more and let them rest together on Reid’s thigh; and Reid gave him a look that calmed him. It told him that, just like everything so far, they would figure all this out together. Whatever this was or was going to become, there was no need to worry. Again, no words were spoken but there was an us. Luke closed his eyes and just let himself rest in the comfort of this unspoken calm.
Time went on and it began to get late, conversation more sporadic and quiet. When Stephen began to yawn, Reid smirked at him. “We keeping you up, old man?”
“Hey, watch it.” Stephen responded. “Besides I’ve only got three years on you.” Reid laughed when he saw his friend yawn once more. “I am tired though, and you and Dr. Hughes are going to torture me with more papers, and plans and details tomorrow.” He rolled his eyes. “God, give me meetings and people any day.” He looked at Reid, comfortably lounging with the sleeping baby. “You look like you’re just dieing to get up and drive me back.”
“Um-hmm,” Reid said sleepily. “Give me a minute and I’ll wake-up just fine.”
“I could take you.” Luke spoke up. “I’ve got to go anyway.” Reid opened his eyes, looking noticeably disappointed. “Besides, I’m the only one who hasn’t had anything to drink…except Jacob, of course.”
Stephen looked between Reid and Luke, then said. “Okay. If you’re sure you’re ready to go.”
“Yeah.” Luke got up and put his hands in his pockets, rocking onto his heels.
Katie got up and removed Jacob from Reid’s arms. “I’ll just put him to bed…” When he looked confused, she said, “so you can say a proper goodnight to Luke.”
“Oh, right.” And Luke pulled him to his feet where they stood close.
Stephen began carrying glasses to the kitchen, giving them some alone time.
Luke stood close to him, looking into his eyes. “You’ve had a good couple of days, haven’t you?”
“I have.” Reid nodded. “And I’ve missed you.”
Luke smiled at him, licking his lower lip. Reid put his arms around his waist and pulled him flush against him. “Will you stay tomorrow night?”
“Don’t you have that dinner-meeting with the board of directors at Bob and Kim’s?”
Reid nodded, and his eyes told Luke that he still wanted him to come. “I don’t think it’ll go that late - nine or ten.” He looked into Luke’s eyes. “But I suppose it could be later, so if you’d rather…”
Luke shook his head. “I’d love to stay with you. Call me when you’re done.”
“Katie’ll be here if you just want to come over earlier and…wait for me?”
Luke grinned at him, pulling him close for a kiss finally. When they pulled back, he said, “I’ve been wanting to kiss you again all evening.” Reid pulled him back in and kissed him more deeply. His one hand ran up Luke’s back and into his hair, and his tongue gently parted Luke’s lips, causing Luke to break the kiss and pant softly into Reid’s mouth, closing his eyes. Reid ran a thumb gently over Luke’s cheekbone and over his jaw, down to his chin. Luke opened his eyes to find Reid’s warm eyes on him.
Driving down the main road out of Oakdale-proper, and towards his grandmother’s cottage, Luke felt like he had a million questions he wanted to ask; but he asked none.
“Do you love him?” Stephen broke him out of his thoughts.
“Hmm?” Luke looked briefly over at him. “Um.” He was taken aback by this sudden, very forthright question.
“I’m sorry. Does this seem very sudden? I don’t mean to…I guess I have no right to ask. That’s between you and Reid but…”
“No, that’s okay. You love him, and you’re protective of him.” Luke nodded at him. “And I’ve only known Reid for a month and a half. I understand. I’d feel the same way if some woman came waltzing into my best friend’s life so suddenly this way.”
Stephen nodded. “Reid is…well, he can give the impression that he’s tough and…that nothing can hurt him, but…”
“But that’s not true…I know.”
“Strange, for years I looked up to Reid, was always in-love with him really.” Luke nodded imperceptibly, and swallowed. “But all along, he was this little kid too…he was only nineteen when we met, and I guess I’ve always sort of been his protector, in a way. And all these years, he’s only really been casual with most of the men he’s dated.”
“But not when he was with you.” Luke couldn’t stop the words from escaping.
“No, not with me; I guess that’s why I ask. I’m not sure if it makes sense to you. With me, Reid was never at risk of having his heart broken, since he had mine in his hands. And with the other men, Reid was so casual that I knew they couldn’t hurt him, not really.” Luke looked over at him, understanding his meaning now. “But with you,” Stephen continued. “Reid really cares about you. His heart’s in it. I just don’t want to see him hurt. I know that’s the risk you take when you let people get close to you, but…”
“But Reid doesn’t do that very often.” Luke finished the thought for him, catching Stephen’s eye again and seeing that they both understood.
“But he has with you.” And Stephen looked at him with a small smile that was hard to decipher. “You may only have known him a short while, but he’s let you in closer than he ever has me.”
Luke doubted this, remembering the intimate way the two slept together on the couch earlier in the day. “Are you sure?” he asked. “The way he talks about you, the way you are together - he seems to trust you completely.”
“I think he does…and he has every reason to. But you…” Stephen looked thoughtfully at him. “There’s something about you…I’ve seen the way he looks at you, the way he talks about you…you’ve disarmed him.” Luke looked confused. “There was always one final layer of armor surrounding his heart…that’s why it didn’t work out between us…he could never let it down, as much as he wanted to. But with you…he did. And yes, it happened quickly, but it happened.”
Luke was quiet, letting Stephen’s words sink in. “I do love him.” He finally said.
As they drove, Luke realized that was the first time he’d said the words out loud. Why now, and why to him? “I haven’t told him.” And he laughed quietly. “Actually, I’ve never told anyone. Is it strange that I’m telling you? Practically a stranger to me, and yet not a stranger. And you, of all people.”
“What do you mean, me of all people?”
Luke thought he sounded slightly hurt. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. I just mean…well, before I met you, I saw you twice...you and Reid, that is.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, and before that, whenever Reid spoke of you I could tell how much he loves you…I couldn’t help but be jealous.” Stephen smiled softly at the younger man. “And when I arrived at Katie’s place today…the way you guys were…his head in your lap…I’m ashamed to say that I almost left.”
“Were you angry?”
“No. But I was jealous; jealous of the time you’ve had with him. And the closeness. And I was scared, I still am I guess.”
“Scared of what?”
“I’ve never felt like this. It’s strange because I did love Noah, but it was never like this. I trust Reid, but I’m still scared, because he moves me like no one else ever has, and…well, I was going to say ‘what if I lose him?’ but I’m not sure I have him. And you do, you have him. Don’t get me wrong; I know you love Kyle, and that you and Reid aren’t together like that anymore. But as his friend, you have him, his trust and his loyalty. And I’m not sure…do I have him? Sometimes I feel so sure with him, but it’s all so new, for both of us…so being around the two of you, I guess it brought up some insecurities for me.”
They drove in silence the rest of the way, and Luke felt embarrassed. Why did he always feel the need to spill his guts to everyone? Noah had always hated the way he would share his personal feelings with anyone - but this wasn’t just anyone. Stephen seemed to encourage this kind of confidence. He could see why Reid would have opened up to him, after all those years living shut off from everyone. But he was embarrassed at having shared such personal things, and with Stephen before having said them to Reid even.
He pulled into the driveway of his grandmother’s cottage and Stephen turned to face him. “I hope you’re not embarrassed.” He said.
“How did you know?”
“I’m pretty good at reading people, as are you. But, I’ve had a bit more practice…I’ve got a few years on you.” Luke laughed quietly. “I get the impression that you open your heart pretty easily…and maybe have had it stomped on a few times because of that.” Luke nodded. “Anyway, one of the people I’m very good at reading…is Reid. And he doesn’t open his heart easily, but he has to you. And in a way he’s never done before, not even with me. I know things are new between you two, but I would trust your instincts, especially those feelings you have when he looks at you.”
Luke knew what Stephen was talking about. When Reid looked at him, all of the worries and questions of his life simply fled. All his challenges felt conquerable. And he felt a peace that was so deep come over him.
“That’s how I feel with Kyle. As much as I love Reid, and I do and I always will, Kyle’s love is different…it’s sure and it’s mine. And I knew he loved me even before he said it.” Luke met Stephen’s eyes and saw warmth there. “I want Reid to be happy, and I’ve never seen him so happy as he is right now, Luke. And I know that it’s because of you. I have no doubt of that.”
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