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It's the most wonderful time of the year
If you're into swinging wildly between a manic energy that keeps you up all hours of the night writing, baking & talking about whatever, & a heavy desire to dig a hole to go die in while life passes by unnoticing.
I miss you, mania. You wreak havoc on my bank account at your worst, but goddamn do I get shit done when I'm on a roll. I've never cooked ( Read more... ) -
all over the place
My brain feels like too many browser tabs open at once, & I can't figure out which one the music is coming from. But it won't stop when I try to sleep at night.
Work has been keeping me occupied & giving me purpose; it's honestly what I need to combat days I can't function. Days I want to crawl into a cave & sleep forever, not eating, drinking or ( Read more... ) -
I feel so overwhelmed
I'm on the verge of making a huge career change. If my time at Arc has taught me anything, it's that I can make a difference in peoples' lives just by being myself. And despite what I see in my darkest moments, I can be a decent person who genuinely wants to help others.
Hopefully, as of Fall 2015, I'll be back in college studying to be a nurse. It ( Read more... ) -
hooray, an update!
Yet again, I've let this blog slide. Mainly because I was locked out due to not remembering my password (I was spoiled by auto-login on my old phone) D: but now that I'm back, I realise how much I've missed writing about what's on my mind. It was therapeutic for me, regardless of what state of mind I was in while writing. I've been reflecting a lot ( Read more... ) -
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So many bills, so little time money. This wouldn'tve happened if I hadn't one overboard with presents this year, but I felt like I had to make up for years past when I couldn't afford nice things for everyone. All too late I'm realizing the cost of letting my mania get the best of me: I get all these insane ideas that don't pan out & go nuts buying ( Read more... ) -
again, I forget about this blog
In the many moons since I've posted, things have been looking up..The kiddo is 1 now. I can't believe he's close to taking his first steps already! I went to his first birthday party, & part of me felt awkward being around such a big family after having never heard of me before.. But Eileen (Andrea's mom, the entire reason we met at all) was so ( Read more... ) -
My first allergy..
After years of having sunburns erupt into full-blown peeling oozefests when using after-sun, I've finally determined that I'm allergic to aloe. AWESOME
I devoted an entire day to hunting for aloe-free after-sun lotion with no results.
the only reason this mega-bad burn is healing properly is that I've used Aveeno Healing Ointment for dry skin once a ( Read more... ) -
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Why do I stay this busy? Uhm, because I don't want to waste a nice summer day when it's actually NOT raining for once in a dark basement.
I might as well not exist or even live here.
That's okay too.
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Stop, stop.
I really just want everything to stop for a minute so I can enjoy the silence.
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Ever since Mum moved here 5 years ago, her neighbor Jose has stood on his back porch & watched us whenever we’re in the backyard. He just stares, barely blinking. It’s grown from just weird to unsettling as fuck.
There’s a chain link fence & a few taller bushes between the yards, but he has a clear view of the back porch. He doesn’t answer when Mum ( Read more... )