all over the place
My brain feels like too many browser tabs open at once, & I can't figure out which one the music is coming from. But it won't stop when I try to sleep at night.
Work has been keeping me occupied & giving me purpose; it's honestly what I need to combat days I can't function. Days I want to crawl into a cave & sleep forever, not eating, drinking or caring about what I look like. Then there are days when I want to do it all: clean the house, bake something, go to the gym, have sex, play Assassin's Creed & stay up til sunrise.. only to do one or maybe two of those things & feel overwhelmed by the list I've made for myself. I'm the master of making lists of shit I never do. It helps calm the mania to see my plans laid out in front of me.
Someday, I'll be even better at managing my bipolar. Until then, I'll keep up the pretense of having my shit together.