So guess what, I actually passed the revalidation and got in as a probationary employee! After the revlidation  I actually felt really light and more happy. I thought back on why things were so rough back then and I could hardly piece together anything. How small things turned into something so major for me. I suppose I was stressed out by the ( Read more... )

I used to think that me getting a job would make it easier in terms of financial stuff but right now I kind of feel like I'm being much more of a burden than actually being able to help out. I'm really out of cash I don't even have money to go to work or eat so I have to ask my Mom for money to spend for the day, asking money from her lets her ( Read more... )

It's time to dump my thoughts here again. There's been quite a lot running through my mind for the past days and there's really no way to unload all of them so I must turn back to this and let them run free and move on with my life. Hmm, though I don't think there's much to say anymore...maybe if I wrote about it right away there was a lot to say. ( Read more... )

I told myself I'd lay off of this because it's always just filled of negatives thoughts and sad things and it's not really fun to read when I look back.....but I can't seem to draw myself away from this. It's an outlet and outlet's are good or else my head fills up and things get messy ( Read more... )

Another disturbing dream...I don't know but I woke up from another nightmare and for the first time I was thankful that Izzy belongs to another timezone that she was there when I woke up ( Read more... )

Dream was weird, it was sad somewhat, I think I was part of a team, there was a girl and a guy and some others and we were being condemned by something. A mafia or some sort of dangerous group was after us and we were defending, fighting them, decieving them and also at the same time, finding the truth to all of this. One by one I watched my team ( Read more... )

I just slept all day today. Probably running away from myself or my own thoughts. I know all this torture is my own doing. That it's all in my own head. Emotionally dragging yourself down, hurting yourself...in other words emotional suicide ( Read more... )

 Nagpapahanap ka di ka naman hinahanap.

Ah. Wow. What a day. I know my place then.
As always, I wasted another day.
Waiting for something that wouldn't happen.

The only good thing about today is, I slept all day.

 I was pretty dizzy all night but I wanted to stay up though I ended up falling asleep a little bit around 4 or something ( Read more... )