Fic : Demons Part 6
Title: When Demons Come a Calling - Part 6
Author: Kimmi
Fandom: CSI
Pairing: Sara/Catherine
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I only wished I owned Sara and Catherine. Unfortunately CBS does, I’m just borrowing them.
Summary: When Sara’s past comes back to haunt her it arrives with a vengeance.
Spoilers: Up to Nesting Dolls, after that it takes a sharp left turn.
Authors Notes: This is dark, full of angst and deals with themes of rape and torture, although I don’t think I got too graphic. I also do not have a beta so there will be errors.
Extra warning on this part. This is more of a filler part, mostly Sara backstory, you could skip it and not get lost on the next part.
Chapters | 1 | 2-3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7-8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 |
Part 6
Sara was quickly losing her mind. She had arrived home four hours ago and mindful of her deal with Catherine had dutifully allowed the officer to clear the apartment while she stood anxiously in the hallway outside. It had been more than a little nerve wracking to have a complete stranger in her home looking in the closets, behind all the doors and under the bed as she was a private person by nature.
Once she had seen the uniformed cop out the door she had plopped herself down on the sofa with a beer and attempted to find something on TV. She tried to distract herself, unsuccessfully, from remembering the mind numbing terror she had felt at waking up and feeling his cold clammy hands moving over her skin as his weight pressed her deep into the mattress. She had been so scared and disoriented that at first she had just laid there until she realized what was happening.
She turned up the volume when she could have sworn she heard the ripping sound her clothes had made as he tore them off her body. The night had been cold, fall spinning quickly into winter, and the night air had raised goose bumps over her naked flesh. The full autumn moon had streamed in through the thin curtains covering her window, giving her a good, but ghostly look at his face. She had started screaming then, hoping someone would hear her, but she knew the party going on down the hall made it unlikely.
His putrid breath had made her gag as he tried to kiss her, turning her face to the side to avoid his mouth her eyes had locked onto the strange flower lying by her head. The sight of it, some sick twisted romantic gesture, had stirred a rage in her so sharp she thought it might cut her from the inside out, and Sara had blindly struck out trying to fight him off.
Her fists had done little to deter him, but then her hand had brushed against the cheap lamp on her nightstand. She had desperately grabbed for it, and brought it down over his head with terror fueled strength. The first hit had dazed him and the second had nearly knocked him out. She had pushed him off her and ran for the door, clutching her torn clothing, trying to cover herself. By the time she had found help and the cops had shown up, he was gone.
Sara leapt up and ran out to her balcony to take deep breaths of the clear night air as the smell of his cheap cologne assaulted her nose. She knew it wasn’t real but that didn’t stop the bile from rising bitterly in her throat and the cold sweat breaking out on her body.
Letting the cool wind of the desert night sweep over her Sara wished she could see the stars. Even though she lived a couple miles from the strip the bright lights from the casinos obliterated the view of the night sky. She briefly entertained the thought of sneaking out of her apartment and driving out into the desert to get a better view but knew how dangerous that would be. No matter how self destructive she had been the last few months, she didn’t want to die.
When she was a kid Sara had often snuck out her bedroom window and into the tree next to the house to get away from the yelling and fighting. She couldn’t go far just in case on of her parents came looking for her because if they had ever caught her out there the punishment would have been swift and extremely painful.
Sara sighed and went back inside. Thinking about her childhood wasn’t much better than thinking about Michael Thomas. She had spent the first thirteen years of her life in a certifiable nightmare. Her father beat her mother, her mom hit her dad and they both hit her and her brother. Steve had left home the minute he graduated high school when she was eight and that had left only her in the house as the lone recipient of their parents’ fury. Then one night her entire existence had been turned upside down.
Being dragged out of bed in the middle of the night wasn’t an unusual event. This time though Sara had known something was different. Her mother had a wild look in her eye that she had never seen before. The next few minutes were a blur until she saw the knife in her mother’s hand. Her father, drunk and passed out, never stirred as the woman stood over him until the blade sank deep into his chest. By the time he was aware of what was happening to him, it was too late. Ten more times her mother had struck, his blood falling like red rain each time she raised her hand until the entire room was covered in spatter.
She had spent the majority of her life trying to forget the two most traumatic events of her life and in the last few weeks she had had both shoved down her throat. First Grissom had badgered her until she finally broke down and told him about her childhood and how her mother had murdered her father. Now the monster that had stolen the last shred of innocence she’d had, who had killed five women before coming after her, was back. Five women once again raped and slaughtered, he was repeating the pattern. He wanted another shot at making her his sixth victim. And he’d made sure she knew it.
Sara was ready to scream. The more she tried not to think about what was going on the more it plagued her. She had no idea what she was going to do with herself if Grissom and Brass refused to let her come into the lab for any length of time. At least when she had been suspended for a week she had been able to leave the apartment if she wanted to without fear or a police escort. It was one thing to say she wasn’t going to let Michael Thomas scare her out of her home, it was another thing to be trapped in it.
Grabbing another beer Sara racked her brain for something to do. She needed to distract herself from the horrifying events of the day. Yesterday her life had been trudging along its normal routine and today it was completely turned upside down. The man that had changed the course of her life was once again hunting her.
After the attack Sara had tried to continue with her studies but she began seeing Thomas lurking around every corner even after he was caught. She wondered incessantly everywhere she went if he had been behind that bush or in that doorway, watching her. She had never felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up or gotten a chill down her spine or any of the things that are supposed to happen when someone is stalking you. She hadn’t known she was in danger and she was afraid she wouldn’t know if it was happening again.
She hadn’t had a plan when she left school and had stumbled onto the job with the coroner by accident. Needing money and a new place to live it had seemed as if there really wasn’t a choice. Working there a few years she had become familiar with the CSI’s and Sara had found a crusade which had eventually led her to Vegas. This of course was where she had met a blonde, blue-eyed, bossy, opinionated, stubborn, headstrong, dedicated, intelligent, beautiful goddess that had never made it a secret that she didn’t want the brunette around. Sure Catherine had told her today that she didn’t hate her, but she hadn’t said she liked her either.
She had always wanted Catherine’s friendship but she would have settled for her respect. For a while it had looked like she might be making headway but after Eddie’s murder it seemed as if she would never have either. While Sara had never limited attraction to something as insignificant as gender she knew that Cath was as straight as they came and would most definitely never want her. So she had tried to ignore the other feelings she had for the blonde pushing them to the furthest recesses of her mind, categorizing them as an exercise in futility and masochism but had always failed miserably. It seemed as if once that vivacious woman got into your system there was no cure.
She sank further into the soft cushions of her couch letting her head fall back as the memory of Catherine’s arms wrapped around her swept through her. That one embrace was enough to bring every hope, every dream, every late night longing rushing back to the surface. Sara closed her eyes and let it come, reliving every second of the contact she hadn’t had time to think about at the time. The warmth of her body, the feel of her perfect breasts pressed intimately against her back and safety and security of those strong arms wrapped around her, it was a much more pleasant activity than thinking about the horrors of her past and the uncertainty of her future.
Sara had no idea how long she had drifted around her apartment lost in thoughts of her blonde co-worker when she was forcefully thrown back into reality by a knock at her door. She gave a sigh thinking it was probably Grissom or one of the guys coming by to check on her or hopefully give her some news. Not wanting to have to justify herself to her boss if it was him she went to grab for the beer bottles sitting on the coffee table and furrowed her brow wondering when she had drank another two. She clearly remembered the first couple but had no memory of the second set. She shrugged it off as stress and carried the bottles with her, dropping them in the trash can on the way.
Peering through the peephole Sara was surprised to see the cop that had escorted her home. Wondering why he was up there instead of out front keeping an eye out for Michael Thomas she opened the door.
Xxx
Catherine was finding it hard to concentrate. Her conversation with Sara out in the parking lot was weighing heavily on her mind. She had told her the truth when she said she didn’t hate her, but she could understand how the brunette had gotten that impression. She knew she had a temper and that she tended to take it out on those around her, she just hadn’t realized how often it had been Sara that had drawn her ire. Now she was regretting every cutting remark, every put down, every glare she had sent the younger woman. She had never really made an attempt to befriend her.
Why was that? What was it about the lanky brunette that had made Cath keep her at arms length? Sure Sara wasn’t the most social person but then neither was Grissom and she counted him as one of her dearest friends. Was it the fact that Gil had brought her, another woman, a stranger, in to investigate Warrick? Catherine had let that bias her before she had ever gotten a chance to know Sara and she had never really attempted to change it. Then there was the relentless way she pursued a case, forgoing sleep and food. Maybe it was her arrogant attitude, the way she got territorial and bitchy if someone suggested they could do a better job? Of course they all got protective of their cases but Sidle seemed to take it personally.
A realization hit her like a ton of bricks. Of course Sara would take it personally. The job was her life. She wasn’t just looking for justice for the victims but also for herself. She needed to solve cases to fight her own demons. She wasn’t just empathic when it came to their pain, she was reliving her own. God she had been so stupid. The signs had been there but she hadn’t been able to put them together, or maybe she hadn’t wanted to.
Silently vowing to make up for every cross word she had ever thrown the brunette’s way Catherine went back to going over every millimeter of the sheets from their scene. If she had to stay there all night to find one shred of evidence, she would. They had to find this guy before he got a chance to go after Sara again, before he had a chance to take her away from them.
TBC
Author: Kimmi
Fandom: CSI
Pairing: Sara/Catherine
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I only wished I owned Sara and Catherine. Unfortunately CBS does, I’m just borrowing them.
Summary: When Sara’s past comes back to haunt her it arrives with a vengeance.
Spoilers: Up to Nesting Dolls, after that it takes a sharp left turn.
Authors Notes: This is dark, full of angst and deals with themes of rape and torture, although I don’t think I got too graphic. I also do not have a beta so there will be errors.
Extra warning on this part. This is more of a filler part, mostly Sara backstory, you could skip it and not get lost on the next part.
Chapters | 1 | 2-3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7-8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 |
Part 6
Sara was quickly losing her mind. She had arrived home four hours ago and mindful of her deal with Catherine had dutifully allowed the officer to clear the apartment while she stood anxiously in the hallway outside. It had been more than a little nerve wracking to have a complete stranger in her home looking in the closets, behind all the doors and under the bed as she was a private person by nature.
Once she had seen the uniformed cop out the door she had plopped herself down on the sofa with a beer and attempted to find something on TV. She tried to distract herself, unsuccessfully, from remembering the mind numbing terror she had felt at waking up and feeling his cold clammy hands moving over her skin as his weight pressed her deep into the mattress. She had been so scared and disoriented that at first she had just laid there until she realized what was happening.
She turned up the volume when she could have sworn she heard the ripping sound her clothes had made as he tore them off her body. The night had been cold, fall spinning quickly into winter, and the night air had raised goose bumps over her naked flesh. The full autumn moon had streamed in through the thin curtains covering her window, giving her a good, but ghostly look at his face. She had started screaming then, hoping someone would hear her, but she knew the party going on down the hall made it unlikely.
His putrid breath had made her gag as he tried to kiss her, turning her face to the side to avoid his mouth her eyes had locked onto the strange flower lying by her head. The sight of it, some sick twisted romantic gesture, had stirred a rage in her so sharp she thought it might cut her from the inside out, and Sara had blindly struck out trying to fight him off.
Her fists had done little to deter him, but then her hand had brushed against the cheap lamp on her nightstand. She had desperately grabbed for it, and brought it down over his head with terror fueled strength. The first hit had dazed him and the second had nearly knocked him out. She had pushed him off her and ran for the door, clutching her torn clothing, trying to cover herself. By the time she had found help and the cops had shown up, he was gone.
Sara leapt up and ran out to her balcony to take deep breaths of the clear night air as the smell of his cheap cologne assaulted her nose. She knew it wasn’t real but that didn’t stop the bile from rising bitterly in her throat and the cold sweat breaking out on her body.
Letting the cool wind of the desert night sweep over her Sara wished she could see the stars. Even though she lived a couple miles from the strip the bright lights from the casinos obliterated the view of the night sky. She briefly entertained the thought of sneaking out of her apartment and driving out into the desert to get a better view but knew how dangerous that would be. No matter how self destructive she had been the last few months, she didn’t want to die.
When she was a kid Sara had often snuck out her bedroom window and into the tree next to the house to get away from the yelling and fighting. She couldn’t go far just in case on of her parents came looking for her because if they had ever caught her out there the punishment would have been swift and extremely painful.
Sara sighed and went back inside. Thinking about her childhood wasn’t much better than thinking about Michael Thomas. She had spent the first thirteen years of her life in a certifiable nightmare. Her father beat her mother, her mom hit her dad and they both hit her and her brother. Steve had left home the minute he graduated high school when she was eight and that had left only her in the house as the lone recipient of their parents’ fury. Then one night her entire existence had been turned upside down.
Being dragged out of bed in the middle of the night wasn’t an unusual event. This time though Sara had known something was different. Her mother had a wild look in her eye that she had never seen before. The next few minutes were a blur until she saw the knife in her mother’s hand. Her father, drunk and passed out, never stirred as the woman stood over him until the blade sank deep into his chest. By the time he was aware of what was happening to him, it was too late. Ten more times her mother had struck, his blood falling like red rain each time she raised her hand until the entire room was covered in spatter.
She had spent the majority of her life trying to forget the two most traumatic events of her life and in the last few weeks she had had both shoved down her throat. First Grissom had badgered her until she finally broke down and told him about her childhood and how her mother had murdered her father. Now the monster that had stolen the last shred of innocence she’d had, who had killed five women before coming after her, was back. Five women once again raped and slaughtered, he was repeating the pattern. He wanted another shot at making her his sixth victim. And he’d made sure she knew it.
Sara was ready to scream. The more she tried not to think about what was going on the more it plagued her. She had no idea what she was going to do with herself if Grissom and Brass refused to let her come into the lab for any length of time. At least when she had been suspended for a week she had been able to leave the apartment if she wanted to without fear or a police escort. It was one thing to say she wasn’t going to let Michael Thomas scare her out of her home, it was another thing to be trapped in it.
Grabbing another beer Sara racked her brain for something to do. She needed to distract herself from the horrifying events of the day. Yesterday her life had been trudging along its normal routine and today it was completely turned upside down. The man that had changed the course of her life was once again hunting her.
After the attack Sara had tried to continue with her studies but she began seeing Thomas lurking around every corner even after he was caught. She wondered incessantly everywhere she went if he had been behind that bush or in that doorway, watching her. She had never felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up or gotten a chill down her spine or any of the things that are supposed to happen when someone is stalking you. She hadn’t known she was in danger and she was afraid she wouldn’t know if it was happening again.
She hadn’t had a plan when she left school and had stumbled onto the job with the coroner by accident. Needing money and a new place to live it had seemed as if there really wasn’t a choice. Working there a few years she had become familiar with the CSI’s and Sara had found a crusade which had eventually led her to Vegas. This of course was where she had met a blonde, blue-eyed, bossy, opinionated, stubborn, headstrong, dedicated, intelligent, beautiful goddess that had never made it a secret that she didn’t want the brunette around. Sure Catherine had told her today that she didn’t hate her, but she hadn’t said she liked her either.
She had always wanted Catherine’s friendship but she would have settled for her respect. For a while it had looked like she might be making headway but after Eddie’s murder it seemed as if she would never have either. While Sara had never limited attraction to something as insignificant as gender she knew that Cath was as straight as they came and would most definitely never want her. So she had tried to ignore the other feelings she had for the blonde pushing them to the furthest recesses of her mind, categorizing them as an exercise in futility and masochism but had always failed miserably. It seemed as if once that vivacious woman got into your system there was no cure.
She sank further into the soft cushions of her couch letting her head fall back as the memory of Catherine’s arms wrapped around her swept through her. That one embrace was enough to bring every hope, every dream, every late night longing rushing back to the surface. Sara closed her eyes and let it come, reliving every second of the contact she hadn’t had time to think about at the time. The warmth of her body, the feel of her perfect breasts pressed intimately against her back and safety and security of those strong arms wrapped around her, it was a much more pleasant activity than thinking about the horrors of her past and the uncertainty of her future.
Sara had no idea how long she had drifted around her apartment lost in thoughts of her blonde co-worker when she was forcefully thrown back into reality by a knock at her door. She gave a sigh thinking it was probably Grissom or one of the guys coming by to check on her or hopefully give her some news. Not wanting to have to justify herself to her boss if it was him she went to grab for the beer bottles sitting on the coffee table and furrowed her brow wondering when she had drank another two. She clearly remembered the first couple but had no memory of the second set. She shrugged it off as stress and carried the bottles with her, dropping them in the trash can on the way.
Peering through the peephole Sara was surprised to see the cop that had escorted her home. Wondering why he was up there instead of out front keeping an eye out for Michael Thomas she opened the door.
Xxx
Catherine was finding it hard to concentrate. Her conversation with Sara out in the parking lot was weighing heavily on her mind. She had told her the truth when she said she didn’t hate her, but she could understand how the brunette had gotten that impression. She knew she had a temper and that she tended to take it out on those around her, she just hadn’t realized how often it had been Sara that had drawn her ire. Now she was regretting every cutting remark, every put down, every glare she had sent the younger woman. She had never really made an attempt to befriend her.
Why was that? What was it about the lanky brunette that had made Cath keep her at arms length? Sure Sara wasn’t the most social person but then neither was Grissom and she counted him as one of her dearest friends. Was it the fact that Gil had brought her, another woman, a stranger, in to investigate Warrick? Catherine had let that bias her before she had ever gotten a chance to know Sara and she had never really attempted to change it. Then there was the relentless way she pursued a case, forgoing sleep and food. Maybe it was her arrogant attitude, the way she got territorial and bitchy if someone suggested they could do a better job? Of course they all got protective of their cases but Sidle seemed to take it personally.
A realization hit her like a ton of bricks. Of course Sara would take it personally. The job was her life. She wasn’t just looking for justice for the victims but also for herself. She needed to solve cases to fight her own demons. She wasn’t just empathic when it came to their pain, she was reliving her own. God she had been so stupid. The signs had been there but she hadn’t been able to put them together, or maybe she hadn’t wanted to.
Silently vowing to make up for every cross word she had ever thrown the brunette’s way Catherine went back to going over every millimeter of the sheets from their scene. If she had to stay there all night to find one shred of evidence, she would. They had to find this guy before he got a chance to go after Sara again, before he had a chance to take her away from them.
TBC