Life is busy these days and I'm starting to feel a little crazy in my head.  As usual, clacking away on my keyboard for LJ therapy helps.

( Probably going to get long and rambly, so get comfortable if you care to read on... )

I was still in bed, snuggling with Charlotte, when Jack got home from work this morning.  By the time I got up and showered, he'd made bacon and scrambled eggs for us.  Oh, I love that man ( Read more... )

Jack took Julia to the movie tonight so Charlotte came in my room and sat on the bed with me.  She flipped through her books while I read through information on the NRP DVD, and when a video clip played, she was suddenly more interested in the videos than her own books.  After that, she made me find every video clip on the DVD, but she wasn't at ( Read more... )

Jack got home early this morning after several days of working night shift up north.  He slept until lunch time and had a couple of short naps throughout the day.  I know that he didn't sleep well while he was away and he drove all night to get home, but I needed him to be present with me today, before the calendar changes to June and before I go ( Read more... )

* I've registered to do a full-day NRP course next month.  I need to start reviewing the textbook now, and I expect a lot of triggers for me.  This will the only the third time I've done it since Abby died.

* My school president posted a "kudos" on our school's e-bulletin board, announcing my provisional graduation from my midwifery program:

"It is ( Read more... )

Thursday:

* I wake up to a trail of barf through Julia's bedroom carpet to the bathroom.  She stays home all day.
* Spend all day getting ready for our weekend away, overwhelmed by my To Do list.
* Errands done at lightning speed after Kim gets home from school
* Swiss cheese memory enables me to forget to pick up Julia's homework for Thurs & Fri.
* ( Read more... )

Grouchy, teething, baby...

hearing and seeing this on the news all day...

then studying NRP, all the while picturing Abby being resuscitated....

her sweet face and tiny purple hands...

There are no words.

I did the NRP today.  Our instructor was a midwife from Calgary and we did the course at a birth center - very cool.  Such a beautiful birth space with three large birth rooms, each with their own bathrooms and big, deep tubs.  I would *love* to work in a place like that someday.

When we arrived at the birth center I was feeling very triggery and ( Read more... )

We skipped church today and Julia was very disappointed.  Unfortunately, her experience of church is playing in the nursery and playing tag downstairs with her friends and I was not prepared to get us there just for that.

I made fruit smoothies for all of us this morning and ate mine with a peanut butter bagel - oh YUM!  After lunch I took the girls ( Read more... )