i am now officially 18. wow. it amazes me to look back and see how far ive come.all that has happened in my life. what really affects me is how hopeless you can feel at the moment that you are experiencing such a trial that you cant even breathe.and with time it heals you,lets you see the world from a brighter and more fulfilling angle. i have come ( Read more... )

soo my party yesterday....hectic crazy wild glorious at times sad at others. it was a technicolor bash let me tell you. whew. my cousin got pissed at me and called me a bitch..i left i was so pissed.i went outside. i actually started crying. i was pretty trashed. i drank like 4 straight shots of vodka and a beer. dear God i was gone. i forgot the ( Read more... )

*sigh*how is everyone? i hope your all doing well. we´re almost to november before i know it it will be december and i will be on a bus to brazil and paraguay and uruguay and argentina and then i´ll be on a plane home!!!! dear God i cant wait. im itching to come home. every fiber of my being is burning with anxiety to come home. i love getting up ( Read more... )

dude my friends i have written like alot of e-mail letters and what have i heard......silence. come on respond please!! i live to hear from you. come on please. thats funny dee about the cussing lol. i miss you guys and i cant wait to come home the time is getting closer and closer.....ahhh beautiful birmingham. well please write my friends please ( Read more... )

my b´day is in 7 days. i am getting the little sticky outty thing on the outside of my ear pierced. i really want a kick ass nose stud. i miss all of the people that have been with me through think and thin and i cant wait to clebrate my brithday and dees and christmas when i get back. we are going to have a week long celebration.its going to be ( Read more... )

im about to explode!!!!!!aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!why me!!! i dont even know what to do when i get home. i feel awkward and weird. im so sick of being here i cant begin to explain it. its been almost 3 months now and i ahve to spend my 18th birthday here. with no friends. this shit is beyond sucking.im going to get trashed ( Read more... )

i dont have anything to say. not even this beautiful country and inspiring hills and sweeping sea cant spark any life inside of me. i feel so dead because i have to let go.i want to grasp so tightly to everything and never let go but i know i cant,i see the damage it did tome and i still feel it to this day. i miss my friends i feel so alone here. ( Read more... )

blah shit fuck im tired.this is not a glorious day. im bored with my circumstances and walking in circles getting nowhere. im tired of taking depression pills. im tired tired tired of this draining world ( Read more... )

i have realized that i am my worst enemy. i know everything about myself. i have destroyed many things but i have built some too. i have lost,loved fiercely,destroyed,built,laughed,cried,fallen into the very depths of darkness and slowly risen to the light. i have created my wings from my experiences and circumstances and have risen above them. i ( Read more... )

what really makes this so difficult? why is it so hard at times. is it because we are accustomed to a certain way of life. we have preset ideals of what life should be. we have created a dream within us that we believe is the only way we can gain happiness. why do we fall? why do we fail? why why why...why is it always why? what makes it so damn ( Read more... )