I have a very sore and very bruised right breast.  But that's okay.  Because it turns out that I do not have cancer. I'm fineFor the past few months there was some concen.  I had a suspicious mammogram, then another one. Then I had a suspiciopus ultrasound. This week I got a second suspicious ultrasound and then five biopsies of the suspicious lump ( Read more... )

DreamsLast night's dream seemed to be some sort of breakthrough.  I haven't felt so good since the time I skipped "the important test I inexplicably haven't studied for" and went to the pub ( Read more... )

SleepingMonday night I couldn't sleep.  I got in 5 hours.  Last night I could barely keep my eyes open and I slept 10.  I'm dreaming again though, which is timely, since I need the access to my subconscious.  Last night I dreamed I was on a train with a bunch of people, on my way to a theological conference and the world was ending.  Duke Ellington ( Read more... )

My first therapy session was very productive. I realized that my disassociation from my body and my feelings is a survival strategy that was probably necessary for me to get through being poor and unhappy, but isn't working so great now.  Similarly, I realized how ridiculous it is for me to apportion blame for our family's poverty to my younger ( Read more... )

Today has been the tech day from hell.

( cut for first world problems )

I am sick of Facebook.  Sure, it's a great way to keep in touch, however tenuously with acquaintances, relatives, etc. But I am sick of the drama and stress ( Read more... )

I'm having some stress ( Read more... )

Back at the end of October I made an appointment to see Geraldine Standish, an elder at the Anishnaabe Health Centre.   A nice man named Rod Michano met me, asked if I had my tobacco (I did) and if I was "on my moon time" (which always makes me giggle inside). As I met with her and explained my situation (stress, facing a lot of big decisions) Mr. ( Read more... )

Today I head to Guelph.  Tomorrow I'm presenting at the Human Rights are Animal Rights conference. I'm looking forward to presenting. I like public speaking. Although I always stress out about travelling, once it's happening I shift into professional mode and everything seems to go fine ( Read more... )

At my doctors appointment yesterday he pointed out how my facial tic (my cheek has been visibly twitching - how embarrassing is that!) and sleep problems (sleeping fine but not feeling rested) may be related to stress.  Colour me unsurprised.( Cut for mental health details )