I can't believe how alone I feel. It's not even that Valentine's Day is just one of those majorly exclusive holidays that make you feel like shit by pointing out something you've been so sensitive about-it's that I don't feel close to anyone. I don't share this emotional connection that I so crave with anyone out here. It leaves me feeling so sad. ( Read more... )

It's 1:30 in the morning. I just left Adrian at "The Output" on Wythe and 12th street. Actually, he left me. He told me we would have so much fun, as it's a dance club. His "best friend" (everyone's his best friend if they've known him a few years or are well-known enough) has a record label and was doing something at the club tonight, so we got in ( Read more... )

I'm sad today. I think about John more and more every day. I'm like a broken record: the same thoughts play through my head. I think about the loss, about cooking together and cleaning the house and going to bed together. I think about having sex and painting and playing boggle. I loved holding his hand in public and kissing him. I think about ( Read more... )