It is a bit nutty to me that I haven't even posted since December. I guess that signifies the big turn around ( Read more... )

My frustration with everything is ridiculous right now. I am so irritated. I know what the cause is. My car died when I got to work yesterday. After 1300 of fixing, 850 of which I STILL owe John, my car is non functional again. I realise this is really only a temporary set back. However I feel like I am drowning. I know I am blowing things out of ( Read more... )

I've decided that if things with John and I end ever I have possibilities ( Read more... )

i cannot believe how many people are dropping kids around me. weird weird weird. i seem to be one of the few that values my freedom. kids are great, when you're in a better place in life for them. i'm not even sure what my mindset is on them anymore. some days i think it would be okay not having to give anything up. i have no idea why anyone would ( Read more... )

I have never really put so much thought into marriage before. I guess it's my nesting bs coming into play. I have been with John for nearing a year. April fools day is our anniversary. I've started paying attention to wedding crap in movies and on tv. Taking note of the dresses and seeing the bouquets, brides maid dresses, rings... I feel very odd ( Read more... )

Last November 6th I left for France. I met Florence, Justine, Sidonie, Iris, my French family. I was lost. I was so excited. Thanksgiving came, I cried, I missed home. Florence tried to make a Thanksgiving dinner. It was a nice gesture. I started French class and trekking to Paris 4 times a week. I hated French, I hated the French, I hated Paris. ( Read more... )

I think sometimes everything is almost too good to be true. Things aren't great around here 24-7 but my relationship is. I don't know if it's the pessimist in me or me trying to prepare myself for something that may or may not ever happen. I have days where I think about the real long term with John. I have days where I wonder when everything is ( Read more... )

So Heather, Jordan and I have planned just about everything for the party next weekend. We bought all the decorations and have prepared all we can at this point. The apt just needs a thorough cleaning Saturday before hand then the decorations need to be hung. I will probably buy John an ugly Hawaiian shirt next week before the party. I have also ( Read more... )

Pretty uneventful around here lately. Mono is better. Steroids make me srsly only want to eat and fuck. The steroids also make my face turn icky-splotchy-bright-red when I drink. I don't know wtf is up with that. Otherwise my face has been super clear and I'm not sure whats doing it. John and I are good. I have achieved what I was trying for and am ( Read more... )

So I found a picture going through a photo album of my dad. It was a picture of him in his Marines uniform. I showed John, John said he looked like a private in that picture. Made me curious. I pulled out Michael (my father)'s phone number and called him. Expecting him to be a complete and total dick like he was last time I called him. He surprised ( Read more... )