Fuck jobs that judge you based on appearance. Fuck having to hide my gender identity to find a job. Fuck employers that have to consider my gender identity for whether or not I'd fit the position rather than my skill and ability. I feel so fucking pissed off to have to pretend to put on some bullshit facade in order to work somewhere that I ( Read more... )

24 hours and one Uhaul later, all of my personal belongings are now in Portland and are mostly arranged in my new room, in my new home, with my new housemates, in a somewhat new town. Fighting some fears of extending myself or taking up space in my new home and remembering to just put myself out there and not be afraid. I take up space and that's ( Read more... )

Okay, here we go. I'm gonna beeee free. I'm gonna be free. And I'm gonna beeee braaave. And I'm gonna be brave. I'm gonna live each day as if it were my last. Fantastically. Fantastically. Couuurrrageously. Courageously. With grace ( Read more... )

(this is totally going to be without any background story and just me processing something ( Read more... )

Last night in the middle of my last class ever I got this huge ball of anxiety in my belly. A feeling I typically get when something is very wrong or when I'm being triggered. Oof, transition has had it's waves of being hard and bringing up past experiences. In a few moments it suddenly hit me super hard that I'm leaving in two weeks. Leaving my ( Read more... )

Golly I'm such a homebody lately. For the most part at least ( Read more... )

Room hunting in Portlandtown. And finishing up tidbits of school + graduation stuffs. Little hills of sadness starting to roll up in getting closer to the end of the month. Getting slightly more nervous about where I'm going to be living. Job stuff is not as much of a stress, though I know it will be eventually. I have a little mound of money to ( Read more... )

Ok quick tidbits ( Read more... )

It's difficult for me to place responsibility on a sole experience to make sense of certain characteristics about me and who I am today. But every so often there are pretty clear connections that I feel can be drawn to past experience and how they have affected me in the present. In this case, it's not to say that only past trauma is a primary ( Read more... )

Parents and thanksgiving. It is usually one of the times of the year that I especially wish I owned a car so I wouldn't feel like I'm stuck here for longer than I want to be. It's good to see some of my biological family every so often. But almost immediately I feel like I get sucked back into modes of behavior and feelings from when I lived in ( Read more... )