The Dork Legacy 3.1
Previously, on The Dork Legacy:
[ 1.0 | 1.1 | 1.2 | 1.3 | 1.4 | 1.5 ]
[ 2.0 | 2.1 | 2.2 | 2.3 | 2.4 | 2.5 | 2.6 | 2.7 ]
[ 3.0 ]
Last update, Bilbo met his future wife, Shelby, who quickly became my favourite sim in the house. Also last update, tragedy struck when a MASSIVE FIRE took the lives of both Tara and Bao-Dur, causing much misery.
Sad to have ended last update on a sad note, I'm going to begin this one on...a sad note. But that is sort of happy. There was NO WAY I was going to let Tara's grave be a regular one, when I'd tried SO HARD to get her LTW, and she was days away from dying platinum anyway.
So I cheated. The downside to this was that I had to kill her again, thus re-breaking everyone's hearts.
Especially Einstein. He stood out here wailing for hours after everyone else had left. ;-;
On a happier note: It would feel like cheating to marry in a townie I'd designed myself, but oh please get in my legacy. <3
Bilbo: Yoo hoo! I totally just achieved my life's dream! Am I awesome or WHAT?
Yes, you are awesome. And you're about to get married!
Oh hai Ellie Wall. Nice of you to drop by!
...?!
The festivities begin! In...buy mode. For some reason. Sorry. >.>
Galadriel: This should have been me. ;-;
Sorry, my beautiful pointy-faced lady. Nice dress, though!
Bender: A wedding? I only came for the booze.
Oh hey there sexy! <3
Nariko is looking appropriately dykey.
Oh...you're coming to the wedding? That's cool.
Man...Willow is such a freaking MILF.
Shelby: Heehee, you're tall!
Me: MAWWAIGE! Mawwaige is why we ah gathehed heeyah too-day.
Oh, excuse me, RUDE PEOPLE.
Caedmon: Oh, hey! Wedding guests!
Balthazar Budge: ...Is there a wedding going on or something?
Yes, and you're all interrupting it!
SO CREEPY.
I wonder...is his face a male version of Willoughby's? Because he does have her personality, seeing as how she made him and everything...
Bilbo: Fisticuffs! I challenge you, blessed wife!
Shelby: *pretends not to notice*
With the ceremony over, I bought the champagne and counted to three.
Shelby: ...Where's my husband?
Bilbo: ...Where is everyone?
The moment of truth! Will he shove it in her mouth, or feed her nicely?
Or...stab her in the forehead. That's a new one.
Remember the champagne? This was the count of three. Note the swarm in the background. Also: pretty Katamari.
Bender: Champagne?! That's all you have?! Where's the whiskey? And why is this balloon on my head?!
Me: So, Einstein. Your nephew just got married, how do you feel?
Einstein: The loss of my only assbaby has numbed me to all emotions.
Me: ...Oh. Sorry.
Aren't they just made for each other? (PS - that's Anette Budge on the right. She's Balthazar's sister).
Lonely Teenager: Look at all those people...having fun in the light...and I'm here. Alone. In the darkness. ;-;
...Comfortable!
Bender: I'm outta here.
Shelby: He makes me think of food.
Isn't a wedding supposed to be a HAPPY occasion?
...No?
Anyone? I give up.
HAHAHA. Awesome.
These two are still all over each other. Also: censoring one nipple makes me giggle.
Why, is someone adopting a pet? Yes, I believe so! Because the WHOLE HOUSE wanted it, pretty much. Proof:
That's a lot of +5000s.
Greg, if I didn't love you as a provider of pets and happiness, I would marry you into this legacy.
And here's the kitten! His name is Rancor Beast! If you don't know what that's from, you may live under a rock.
YOU FUCKER.
Nooo! Vanessa! What are you doing? Where's my beautiful chubby momma? ;-;
Also, at some point in moving their stuff/remodeling the house/etc, I lost both heir portraits, and so I had Einstein start on them again.
Second zzort.
If this isn't the only legacy in which you'll see a Servo eating, I'll eat my hat.
;-; Tara. And that's Bao-Dur, next to her. I don't have a portrait painted for him yet because I haven't decided whether or not to bring him back with the Resurrecto-thingy.
Bilbo: Oh, God...how do you mess up a plate? Honestly? I think I'll go kill myself.
So...since even before the fire, I'd been kind of "meh" about playing the Dorks. I was just sick of the laggy house, it had a bad layout, and the garden was practically inaccessible, and just...I hated it. I tried making them a new house a couple of times, but each time I got frustrated and gave up. Well...finally I succeeded (because I tried a 4x4 lot instead of 5x5), and here are the fruits of my efforts:
Please excuse the Lot Debugger sticking out of the roof. >.> And my questionable cropping skills.
And! Since I almost never take pictures of my house, perhaps you'll be glad to know that I did, this time! Unfortunately, I redecorated a lot since I took these pictures, so things will look different later, anyway. But regardless! Let's take a tour:
Here is the pond! :D Behind it is the garage, which I apparently didn't get a shot of, but it has instruments and a train set and such.
Here's the living room (with an updated shot)!
The kids' room, complete with fake aquarium!
Einstein and Vanessa's room.
The toddler/babies room.
Willoughby and Algren's room.
And this is Bilbo and Shelby's room!
Master bathroom.
And the crypt.
Also, I built them a tree house. :D
The garden! (This is a long tour, too bad I'm not getting Headmaster points for it).
The classy-pants foyer.
The hobbies-n-stuff room (with stairs down to the garage).
And the kitchen!
These two come down to this EXACT spot to make out ALL the time.
Here's everyone in front of the new place. Note Mr. Scurvy on the porch up there. :D He's un -stealable because he's against the wall. :D
This picture: *is beautiful*
I guess love is in the air.
This shot is pretty pointless.
This shot, however, does have a point. You may recall that Miyazaki here ran away? Well, when they moved, she was back. Her icon still says, "Ran Away," but she's definitely back.
There's a lot of pet spam in this update...so I'm going to lump it all together in one HUGE chunk, entitled Someone Actually Takes Pictures Of The Pets In Their Legacy. :D
YOU GONNA GET RAPED kitty treats!
End of pet spam. That was fun. :D
WHOA WAIT WHAT?!
Awww. ;-; Poor thing never even got to come inside the new house...
And the kittens! Grump was like a mother to them when their own mother ran away!
Cloverfield: WAAAAAH! ;-;
R.I.P. Grump.
Oh, hey Hera Wall. If you're looking for your sister, you missed her. Hey that rhymed! :D
HI C-3PO!!
3PO: I say! There does appear to be an unsavoury substance just here on the ground! How upsetting!
The final member of the welcome wagon is...my boyfriend sim, Gashi! He...looks very stoned. And Willoughby kind of has the hots for him.
Willoughby: *Oh God I wish my husband were at work!*
Gashi: ...*is she staring at the back of my head?*
Hera decided to play Finger Wiggle with The Cloverfield Monster. Not...a good idea.
Hera: :[ da kitty bited me.
Today, I realised, was Caedmon's last day with us. And...I was actually pretty sad about it. ;-; Even after being pissed off at you for most of your elder life, I don't want you to die, dude.
Caedmon: It's okay. I can finally leave the Material Plane to go be with Gary Gygax.
Me: *sniffle*
So I decided to make his last day a good one. I sent Willoughby to make him some grilled cheese (it's his second aspiration...and since Tara died, he hasn't rolled a single Romance want), and let him play Don't Wake The Llama with Hera and 3PO.
Caedmon: Man. Sunny out, huh?
C-3PO: Your weather observations are quite astute.
Hera: *...How do you CHEAT?*
Willoughby: OMG have you met GASHI here? He's UNEMPLOYED. Isn't that FASCINATING?
Gashi: ...
Also, you can't tell from this picture...but Willoughby ONLY made enough grilled cheese for herself and Gashi. I couldn't find the platter ANYWHERE. >.> Bitch, that was for your dying father!
Luckily, Caedmon had the want to make grilled cheese, and so was actually doubly-happy to make his own.
Unfortunately, no one wanted to talk to him about said sandwiches. ;-; I was worried, because it was getting close to 6:00 and I didn't want his last interaction to be a bad one.
Of course, to add to the stress was Gashi's AWFUL piano playing, a cacophonic accompaniment to my worry. *is poetic*
Me: Well, Caedmon? You ready? I can easily say this legacy wouldn't have gotten anywhere without you.
Caedmon: It's cool. When I'm done, though, would you observe a moment of Silence?
Me: 10' radius, 1 round/level. You betcha, buddy.
Caedmon: Man...I sure did a lot of chick in my day, didn't I?
Me: Yeah, you did. Not as many as your daughter did dudes, but you definitely had your fair share.
Caedmon: I'll get to see Tara again, too.
Death: YES, I BELIEVE THAT CAN BE ARRANGED.
Caedmon: Holy shit! You snuck up on me. Nearly gave me a heart attack.
Death: I'M AFRAID THAT'S QUITE IMPOSSIBLE NOW.
Caedmon: Hey, cool, a suitcase! What's in here?
Death: SEVERAL IMPORTANT ITEMS. YOU SHOULD NEVER GO ANYWHERE WITHOUT YOUR TOWEL, FOR EXAMPLE.
Bilbo: Grandad. ;-;
Willoughby: AND I DIDN'T EVEN MAKE HIM SOME GRILLED CHEESE!
Einstein: lol y she so sad?
As with all death comes new life. Or something smart-sounding like that.
Gashi: WHYYY?! Why did I volunteer for the Welcome Wagon?!
Bilbo: I'm...I'm gonna be a dad!
Actually, there's three. Two boys and a girl. Their names are Times New Roman (or Roman, for short), Trebuchet (Tre for short), and Verdana. I don't know which is which, though.
Baby1: Oooh a robot!
Me: Shelby's geneticized green eyes...Is that BLONDE hair?!
Einstein: *delayed reaction*
Baby 2! Dad's (default) blue eyes, black hair.
Baby 3! Default green eyes...another blonde?! Since when do black and red make blonde?!
Einstein: Hey baby...wanna do something sometime?
Obviously Einstein is suffering from some sort of mania. Poor guy.
Einstein: EVERYONE I LOVE IS DEAD. DDD:
Vanessa: *He'll get over it...*
I remade the "Romance Sim Bedroom."
Willoughby: zzzzz...totally make out with myself....zzzz...
Uh...Miyazaki? I don't think that's gonna happen.
Ghosts!
Bao-Dur: Man! Why'd I hafta die? I was so ultra-groovy!
The Dead Milkmen Heirs wall.
Complete with angry grave possession!
Oh, I was wrong. It was just Tara diving into Caedmon's grave so they could WooHoo Beyond The Grave. :D
Trying even harder to secure the biggest place in my heart, Shelby rolls the MOST ADORABLE WANT EVER. <333
She's very in touch with her inner child.
sim_rants members may recall some default replacements that gave horrible tubewaist to all the female work uniforms...well, they're fixed now. Definitely a little top-heavy, but I really wanted those flared pants. :P
Willoughby: Fuck default replacements! I look good as I am!
Yes you do.
The kittens grew up! This is Lillend!
And Filcher. Notice anything unusual?
He's GOT A PINK TAIL! I have NO idea where that came from, but he is kitty!heir because of it!
...You won't make me change my mind. Man, that's some colourful dust!
I love how sim pets will come to YOU to be scolded. I know mine don't do that.
Look! It's like my two favourite sims!
Bilbo: lol i'm neo.
Algren: *is awesome*
But we...really don't need any more money. You guys have like 150k and two vacation homes. >.>
The end! :D
I realise I didn't get much of a chance to put much actual dorkiness in this update, so I made up for it by being a huge dork at captioning. That's the same, right? :P
Next update: The kids and final kitten grow up! Some people will probably get old! And who knows what else will happen?! (I don't, I stopped playing after that last picture. :P)