Top of the World 15/18
Title: Top of the World
Genre: drama
Warnings: mention of rape fantasy ( the 1st chapter does some explaining.) mention of rape. self mutilation.
Rating: NC-17
Pairings/Characters: Reita/Ruki Ruki/Reita Uruha/Ruki
Synopsis: When Ruki shares his fantasy of being raped, he never thought Reita would make it happen. After things begin to fall apart and Ruki wonders if he ever really wanted it.
Comments: This story is kind of weird. I’ve been working on it for a couple months.
01| 02| 03| 04| 05| 06| 07| 08| 09| 10| 11| 12| 13| 14|
Today is one of our weird practice days. We’re not all in the studio. Just Kai, Uruha, and Aoi there. Reita is doing an interview today. Some monthly magazine contacted him. They’re doing photos too I guess.
I’m working on lyrics and maybe some of the tour designs. I have our upcoming single to get lyrics for. They have about half of the song done. It needs to be revised a bit. I practice singing what I have so far. Recording myself on my laptop so I can listen back to see if I like it.
By lunch, I’m feeling satisfied with it. I saved the latest version I have and email it to the other to see what they think. My phone vibrates and I grab it. A smile spreads across my face.
-You’re doing well, baby? I love you. - A text message from Reita.
-Things are well. Love you.-
I just send it and the phone rings.
It’s Uruha, how strange. I answer.
“Hello?”
“Hey, do you have plans for lunch?”
“No, I don’t.”
“Would you like to join me?”
“Yeah…”
“Okay, I’ll be over in a few minutes.”
I hang up and discard the phone on the ground. I stand up, looking over myself. I need more than a few minutes. I haven’t even gotten dressed yet. I rush into my room to throw on my clothes. I don’t want Uruha waiting on me and getting angry.
I go in the bathroom adjusting my clothes so they are presentable. I make sure that what I need is in my pocket. I brush my teeth. The phone’s vibrating again. I flip it open and spit out the toothpaste. I turn it on speaker.
“Hello…”
“Hey,”
“Reita, hi.”
“I have a quick break. How are you?”
“Good, I’m brushing my teeth.”
“Did you get a lot done today?”
I laugh, “It’s still early.”
I rinse out my mouth. The speaker is turned off and I pick up my phone.
“I’m meeting Uruha for lunch.”
Reita gets quiet.
“Did you hear me?” I ask.
“Yeah, um… I’ll be home later.”
With that, he hangs up. He must not have that much of a break, I think as I hang up. After getting my things together I go to the genkan to put on my shoes. I open the door and make my way out the building into the 101 degree heat.
We live off the main road, down some little street. I see Uruha’s car pulling up. He rolls down the window. I say hello and get in the car. The air conditioning feels nice against my skin.
The ride is quiet but I don’t mind. I’m feeling a little sleepy.
“Where do you want to go?”
I smile thinking to myself.
“To that hamburger place. I really want onion rings.”
He laughs at me, “what?”
“I said I want some onion rings.”
We get a shaded private spot in the restaurant. I know I’ll gain a few pounds if I eat here but the food is so good. I get a chocolate milkshake with whip cream. Uruha orders an ice tea.
“I’m not responsible for what you eat.”
“I’m really sorry about everything,” I say to him.
He lights up a cigarette. I watch him.
“I invited you because I want to mend our friendship.”
I twirl my straw around my drink.
“I shouldn’t have lied to you.”
“We’re both guilty. Let’s just be friends again.”
I suck on my drink.
“It’s not because of what I did is it?”
“Huh?”
“What I tried to do…” I stop not wanting to fully bring up the suicide.
“Ruki, of course not.”
The waitress comes up with my onion rings. My eyes light up and I quickly grab one. Eating it quickly, I hungrily grab another.
“I want to be friends again too,” I tell him between mouth fulls.
“I feel so bad that Reita attacked you afterwards. I didn’t think he’d do that.”
I eat faster not wanting to think about what Reita had done to me.
“We’re really trying to move pass that.”
He grabs one of my onion rings.
“I need to talk to Reita.”
“You haven’t?”
“Not since you were in the hospital. And not really even then.”
“I don’t know if he’s angry with you. It seemed like he was only mad at me.”
“Do you think I should call him?”
“Yeah, he’ll be home tonight.”
I sit, wondering what Uruha would have to say to him. We’ve know each other for a long time. I feel bad for what I did to Reita and Uruha’s relationship. I sigh staring into my drink. I am such a whore.
I move back as the waitress brings our main dish. I’m starving so I eat really quickly. Uruha is surprised when I finish in only a few minutes. He laughs, “And I’m the one who has to get back at a certain time.”
I laugh too. “I didn’t eat that fast.”
He smiles in between bites. I suck on my milkshake waiting for him to finish.
“I’ve written some lyrics for the new song. I sent you an email.”
“Oh, I’ll check that out later. Reita’s doing an interview today?”
“Uh-huh. I only saw him for a few minutes this morning.”
Our lunch is over and Uruha is driving me back. I fell almost sad. I wanted to spend more time with him. I look at him sadly before getting out of the car.
“Thanks for seeing me.”
“Ruki, of course I don’t mind seeing you.”
“Bye,”
I walk quickly back to the apartment. I really don’t want to be out in the heat today. I’m glad to be back in our chilled apartment. My stomach hurts from all the food I ate. I decide to be lazy. Going in our room to lie down. I remove my pants and shirt. The sheets feel so nice against my body. I’m barely there before I just fall asleep.
I wake up, my body feeling sore from sleeping the wrong way. I sit up and look around the room. My contacts are dry on my eyes. I reach for the eye drops and lean my head back. I blink waiting for my eyes to adjust. I yawn wondering how long I’ve slept for.
I gasp as I see the clock.
“5 o’clock! Damn it. No…”
Getting out of bed, I run to the living room to check the computer. There’s so much work to get done.
“Ruki, what the hell are you doing?”
I stop and look towards the door. Reita is taking his shoes off. He walks in further watching me like I’m insane.
“Rei… I fell asleep after lunch and didn’t get anything done.”
He laughs at me. He just stands there and laughs.
I hit at his chest. “Reita, shut-up.”
He grabs my wrist and holds it up.
“Hey!”
“You hit hard.”
He lets go of my arm. “When was lunch?”
I sigh. “I lied down around 1:00.”
He’s laughing again. “You’re so silly.”
I sigh again getting frustrated with him.
“Go get your crazy ass dressed,” he says mockingly.
“Shut-up,” I yell back at him before I run into the room.
“So, I guess you didn’t make dinner?”
I dress quickly, “shut-up.”
Reita
I sit on the couch needing to relax after a long day. I turn on the TV and start flipping though. Ruki comes back out and sits next to me. His head lies on my shoulder. I put my arm around him.
I turn my head towards him. He looks up and I kiss him. He smiles as I pull back.
“What do you want for dinner?”
“I don’t know.”
We’re silent for a bit, I stop at some Challenge show.
“How was your day?”
“The interview went well. The questions were good. I feel like I was really able to communicate with the fans.”
He smiles at me, before climbing in my lap. Smiling shyly as he holds onto my shoulder.
“What?”
“I won’t be able to sleep tonight.”
I raise my eyebrows. “You better not keep me up.”
“Oh yeah, you should call Uruha.”
“Hmm, why?”
“I think he wants to apologize or something.”
“Okay, get up and I’ll call him.”
Ruki
I get off of him and sit on the end of the couch. He opens his phone and stands up. Dialing and disappearing into his room. I’m curious to see what they’re talking about. This is my fault. My stomach starts to hurt. I really hope they don’t fight.
I need a smoke. My cigarettes are in our room on the side table. I stand up.
“Hey, Reita.”
I walk into the room and go to the table.
“I left my cigarettes.”
He’s sitting on the bed, I can’t read his expression.
I grab my cigarettes and leave quickly. I’m really hoping they won’t fight. I know if they fight Reita will get mad at me. I can’t stand it if he yells at me. Going out on the balcony, I start to smoke.
Quite a bit of cigarettes later, I get too warm. The heat is unbearable this time of year. So I retreat back inside feeling nervous about how Reita is feeling. I leave the pack on the coffee table and go to the kitchen to grab some water.
Sitting at the table, I let the cool water soothe my throat.
“Ruki,”
I look up to see Reita coming in the kitchen. He hugs my shoulders. He moves back I stand up. I move towards him.
He hugs me tightly, my face slipping into his neck. He just holds me for a bit.
“Rei, what’s going on?” I mumble into his neck.
He moves back. “What?”
I repeat myself.
“We had a talk. Things are going good.”
He kisses me, I feel relieved.
“And you’re not a slut or whore. I’m so sorry.”
I suddenly feel very awkward.
“Uh ok, you too.”
“You called me those things?” he asks surprised.
I smile at him. He moves back.
“Are you hungry, Ruki?”
I look at him disapproving
“You always ask that because you want me to cook.”
My butt is groped.
“You can cook something up real quick.”
“I can call up somewhere real quick.”
He kisses my cheek.
“Get whatever you want,” he says as he goes to the couch to watch TV.
“Reita!”
“What?”
“You could order.”
“No, I’m busy.”
“Reita!”
I go in the room and join him on the couch. Kneeling next to him.
“Come on, Rei you can order.”
I hold the phone out. He pushes my hand away.
“At least get a menu for me.”
I move closer and press my lips on his. His mouth opens and I suck on his lip, licking it. His arms warp around me pulling me into his lap. I kiss him eagerly. After a second, I move back and just stare at him. I sit in his lap and lean my head on his shoulder. The phone still in my hand. He grabs it.
“I’ll order something, okay?”
I sigh as he says it like it’s been his idea all along. I get off and sit next to him. He’s dialing so I take the remote. I flip though trying to finds something I like. Going a little quicker when I see sports. Not wanting him to notice and asks me to stop.
A hand snakes in between my legs.
“Hey!”
I whack his hand with the remote.
“Ow…” he shakes his hand.
“Why don’t you run up to the convenient store and grab us some drinks?”
“What? Do you want a can of beer?”
“Nevermind.”
“It’s just next store, I could go.”
He ruffles my hair.
“Your hair is a mess and you still have sheet imprints on your face.
“Really?”
He laughs.
“I need to get up and run around. I feel crazy after that nap.”
“That’s cause you are baby,”
I think we agreed not to hit each other, but that’s it. I slap his head.
“Shut-up!”
He grabs my wrist.
“Hey!”
I pull back and he grabs the other one.
“I’ve got you.”
I struggle against him, “let go.”
He moves closer and licks my face.
“Ew…”
My face is licked all over.
“Ugh,” I stick my tongue out in disgust. He kisses me full on. His tongue roaming my mouth. I move back and spit down my chin.
“What the hell are you doing?” he asks me.
I’m struggling again. “Let go of me!”
He lets go of me, I run into the bathroom and shut the door. My face feels gross; I rinse it in the sink. Then dry it off.
What’s wrong with Reita? That was inappropriate and not very attractive. My face isn’t a popsicle. I sit on the ground. My legs outstretched and bent at the knee. The towel across my legs, I bend my body and rest my face in it. I’m too stressed to deal with things properly.
I scream into the towel. Reita knocks something over or bangs into something. Who knows? I can’t help it as I start crying. Maybe it’s the long nap and the fact that I’m falling behind. Lyrics aren’t done, designs aren’t done. They’ll keep making more songs.
I roll onto my side, clutching the towel in my hand. Reita opens the bathroom door.
“Hey…” he says staring at me.
I roll on my back and try to calm my breathing.
“Ruki, I’m so sorry.”
He comes closer and kneels by me.
“Are you okay?”
I nod weakly at him.
“Really?”
He grabs the towel and wipes my face.
“Just leave, Reita. I don’t want you to see me like this.”
He grunts and stands up, staring at me frustrated for a minute.
“I’m sorry, okay?” I cry out at him. Yet again shoving my face into the towel.
“What are you talking about?”
I stare up at him.
“Get up and stop this.”
I stand up and move closer to him. He hugs me.
“Just don’t think about it.”
There’s too much going on in my head. I move back and wipe my face again. Reita’s arm slides around my waist.
“I just can’t stop crying.”
“It’s okay. I’m here with you.”
“Thank you.”
He kisses my forehead.
“Just calm down, okay?”
I set the towel down on the counter and pull Reita out of the bathroom.
AN: I’m really busy with school I’m surprised I had time for this. I feel like I’m doing school work all day and I’m still behind. I feel a little crazy; I thought I heard Cicada faintly when I was typing this. Then a few minutes ago the TV sounded like it was playing Illuminati for a couple seconds. That would be really weird if it was.