eins befehl | audio.

[cantgetlaidin]

[At first there is mumbling in German as he attempts to dial a number on the phone. Agitated, he raises his voice.]

Is this thing even--!

[A brief pause. When he speaks again it's with a forced calm.]

Right. This morning I awoke in a strange house and there is some lunatic woman here claiming to be my wife. If this is some kind of elaborate

Comments

[Phone]

[undying_heroism]

. . .

Dude.

Take a chill pill.

Relax.

[cantgetlaidin]

Absolutely not! Is this your doing?

[undying_heroism]

Wish I could take cred--

Actually, no, my prank would've been much better.

Anyway, you'd better sit down for what I'm about to tell you.

You sitting down yet?

[cantgetlaidin]

Just tell me, Amerika. My patience is wearing thin.

[sturmbahnfurher]

[Hey German. Just have someone speaking back to you in your native tongue.]

A prank it is not, I'm afraid my friend.

[cantgetlaidin]

[He replies in German, audibly slightly more at ease.]

Then what is it?

[sturmbahnfurher]

A kidnapping, I'm afraid, and one you'll find you'll be incapable of getting away from at the moment.

[cantgetlaidin]

I see.

Although I will take what you said into consideration, whether or not escape is possible is something I will have to confirm myself.

[hwamei]

Wei! [ Her standard reply to everyone, but she sounds awfully cheerful... ] Who is speaking? [ Just making sure! ]

[cantgetlaidin]

Er, it's Germany.

[hwamei]

Ah, so you forgot, too. Everyone's been forgetting stuff lately, you know, it's kind of scary.

[Beat.]

Well, welcome again, I guess!

[cantgetlaidin]

What do you mean? What am I meant to have forgotten?

[motheringnation]

Germany?

Ah-...I'm afraid it's not that easy to leave.

[cantgetlaidin]

And why is that?

[motheringnation]

B-Because nothing here makes sense? I've been here for over two years and w-we still haven't found a way home yet?

[cantgetlaidin]

I'm sure I would have heard if a nation had went missing for that amount of time.

[hungry_monster]

[Replies in German.]

I'm afraid it's not that simple.

[cantgetlaidin]

How so?

[hungry_monster]

You've woken up in Mayfield. It's a small town that seems to exist in it's own reality.

If you don't believe me, try to walk past the town's boundaries.

[cantgetlaidin]

That is mind-blowingly illogical.