My father can be extremely callous sometimes but I never saw this one coming. Almost 40 years ago aged about 6 I had saved up £30 over a very long time to buy a puppy from a breeder. He was a black and white Springer Spaniel, I called him Scamper and I adored him. I taught him how to look left and right when crossing the road, he loved to steal ( Read more... )

About an hour ago I heard the rooks, by the time I'd got to the back door I found 4 cats sat there anxiously looking out. I went into the garden apple in hand, and the rooks were going mad, swirling and whirling in a confusing unnerving manner nothing like the murmeration I've seen them do. I watched for ages as others flew over to the corner of ( Read more... )

Four hours at that place yesterday. Just me and my mother which is the first time we've been allowed there alone. And so I did a check up. And the results of that check up have caused yet more vicious rows with my father tonight. An issue I'd said was a logistical nightmare but was overruled on because 'you just don't understand these things',, ( Read more... )

Sometimes I wonder if I had been born with a dick instead of tits and a cunt if my father would actually take any notice of what I said? If perhaps he would actually listen to advice or warnings then to save things going wrong exactly as I said they would. Time after time, after time, I see things ahead because I think things though. I go over ( Read more... )

What happened.... ... Hard to believe it's just over 2 weeks since I felt that I broke. I have had some extremely hard stressful situations going on ( Read more... )

This is hard to write, it is about Saturdays argument. Two or three weeks ago my father & I had an argument. He has driven me crackers over the years inventing a history & a past I never had. I was never allowedit. Well the other week, I commented about it, he has been convinced for years that I was out at weekends going to nightclubs etc with guys ( Read more... )

Well it was a lovely hot Bank Holiday Saturday, I was looking forward to today, had bought all the special extra food bits for lunch* & was feeling positive about the sunny day ahead. Tilly arrived & then my parents. My father had been here 15 minutes then he says he wants to take my mother out for lunch! He thought I'd be all for it, but no I wasn ( Read more... )

Its just been an appalling weekend. Yesterday my father & I had an appalling row caused by the agencies failure to give a fuck. The stress that this causes is sometimes beyond comprehension :-( It was a dreadful row :-(
Today both me & carer were stressed over the time/hours.
It was the anniversary yesterday of my beautiful Stormy pud who died 4 ( Read more... )

It's been an appalling few days. Friday after finally being seen by the consultant after the usual really long wait, he confirmed the Glossopharangeal Neuralgia (GPN), when i told him about the all over random nerve pain & how it behaves etc he said oh that's Sympathetic Nerve Dysfunction (SND). It affects circulation & body temperature, feeling ( Read more... )

I had one of Portisheads songs going in my head so I put one of their CDs on and it's amazing how I'd forgotten how much I like their music ( Read more... )