Terrible
My father can be extremely callous sometimes but I never saw this one coming. Almost 40 years ago aged about 6 I had saved up £30 over a very long time to buy a puppy from a breeder. He was a black and white Springer Spaniel, I called him Scamper and I adored him. I taught him how to look left and right when crossing the road, he loved to steal boysenberries from our garden making his face fur purple. I assumed we'd have loads of adventures over many years. He was however violently ill and had to be put to sleep within a few months. The vets stopped charging for treatment and applied guesswork. Post mortum he was found to have deformed stomach muscles, so food never stayed down, he got no nutrition and became dreadfully ill. On the day Scamper was put to sleep I'd been collected from the swimming baths and I still remember the terrible realisation at what the empty car boot meant. I can still See the empty car boot in my head 😢 I only have two photos of Scamper.
Tonight. My father asked about my drill and was seriously pissed off to find it was thrown out about 2 years ago as the battery had corrupted. The only reason I had that heavy drill was because he insisted I buy one for here so he didn't have to bring his over when needed. He never used the one here, preferring to bring his own. Same applies with the various other heavy tools he made me buy for his use here, rather than letting me buy tools more suited to my usability and physical strength. I commented that he'd made me buy it and he'd never used it. (he also wasn't even going to be using today either). He goes out of the room, comes back "I suppose you want me to pay for the puppy too". I haven't spoken of "the puppy" for years, although I've never forgotten Scamper. Nearly 40 years since I lost him in such a bitter childhood lesson and this?? As an only child that puppy had my dreams, he was my access to fun and adventure, a constant companion given how much we moved home.
The bitter irony is that my father said that he would pay me my £30 back after Scamper died, he never actually did. But I wanted Scamper alive not money. This one of his has really hurt, I don't get where this came from, it's Decades out of the blue and my beloved little puppy who never got to grow up, my childhood companion in a lonely childhood, why is he suddenly another poison arrow against me?
(first post here in some months but cross posted from fb)
Tonight. My father asked about my drill and was seriously pissed off to find it was thrown out about 2 years ago as the battery had corrupted. The only reason I had that heavy drill was because he insisted I buy one for here so he didn't have to bring his over when needed. He never used the one here, preferring to bring his own. Same applies with the various other heavy tools he made me buy for his use here, rather than letting me buy tools more suited to my usability and physical strength. I commented that he'd made me buy it and he'd never used it. (he also wasn't even going to be using today either). He goes out of the room, comes back "I suppose you want me to pay for the puppy too". I haven't spoken of "the puppy" for years, although I've never forgotten Scamper. Nearly 40 years since I lost him in such a bitter childhood lesson and this?? As an only child that puppy had my dreams, he was my access to fun and adventure, a constant companion given how much we moved home.
The bitter irony is that my father said that he would pay me my £30 back after Scamper died, he never actually did. But I wanted Scamper alive not money. This one of his has really hurt, I don't get where this came from, it's Decades out of the blue and my beloved little puppy who never got to grow up, my childhood companion in a lonely childhood, why is he suddenly another poison arrow against me?
(first post here in some months but cross posted from fb)