i beat slowly open, closed, open, closed, catching on accidental grooves inside the mouth and mind of the vessel; it makes a hushed hiss that reverberates quicker than my movements and makes the silence around me twice as loud ( Read more... )

I played this song over and over. I slept with it playing for two days and nights straight, so it's safe to say I generally immunized myself against it ( Read more... )

i hate you so much
you knew everything there was to know about me and now you're fucking dead in every way that matters because all that's left of you is this cracking shell of creature born to hurt and heal and hurt again and in the meantime you dig and dig and tear and snap and shatter every fucking bone in my body because you know every goddamned ( Read more... )

there are times when the only cure for a broken heart
is to break it again.

now was one of those times;
i was brought in close
and held in the hands that shaped me one more time
and crushed
to
foundation.

now let me sleep,
and wake again tomorrow
and begin to build again.

Sometimes it feels as if I am looking into my very own mirror of Erised ( Read more... )

last night- this morning, rather- was not so good.

I finally found my iPod yesterday, and I was happy because of course, that meant I could fall asleep.
I lay in bed and tried to find songs I knew would put me to sleep (which for me doesn't necessarily mean slow songs- just any song that can produce a state where i stop thinking and just listen to ( Read more... )

it's been a long time since i wrote to you. i know. it must be a surprise that i'm doing it now.
it's surprising me too- I was pretty sure i'd gotten over the worse of remembering, the worst of carrying pieces of you lodged in every tender place i ever possessed.
and i still think so. i have dominik- do you remember him?- now, and i'm going to school ( Read more... )

do you remember the night we argued so bad that i turned away from my laptop and i lay with my head facing the wall and i cried, and you cried, and I ignored you for the first time?
it was a sunday
my room was dark except for the light from my laptop on the nightstand and you kept saying my name, over and over, epi? epi? epi? and we were ripping ( Read more... )

I...I miss you so much right now and
i said yourn ame by accident i swear it was just a coincidental typo

i miss you so much and it aches so bad, hummingbird,
it
aches
so
bad,
i-
i miss..
i miss you so much, i just-

sometimes it's like you're walking in a mine field ( Read more... )