I have been thinking about many things lately.. about old friends and the shit they pulled and I didnt realize til now. the things I had let roll off my back that looking back on it I should of talked about it to them or at least threw a mini fit. The things I said sure alright to.. and how many times I jumped for them but they NEVER did for me. I ( Read more... )

just writing to say. Im alive if anyone gives a fuck.. And well thats it...

I really seemed to fuck my life up more than I wanted to, Not that anyone would like to do it. Not only did I screw over myself by getting into a total gay assed fight with my best friend. My bf for like 2 weeks out of NO were was like Im having problems I dont think we should go out. so to make me feel more worthless.. and more depressed and more ( Read more... )

I hate when your around people and you still feel lonely. When you still feel like no one is around you.. Its like NY your surrounded by people and you still are alone. Talk to people online and they say Hi.. an thats about it. I hate having to MAKE conversation with people. Thats all I have to say about that.

I hit a new new low today. Some things were said to me.. and I kinda went nuts.. I dont wanna get all into it. My mental state is bad right now. All I am thinking in my head is about death. What would happen if I just..... died? I feel so rejected lately. So worthless.. I have no friends but one. The rest slowly are stabbing me or have. Or are ( Read more... )

I need to get out. I havent been out to a show in about. *looks at calender* hmm.. when did it turn 2004? Anyways to long to remember the least time. I miss it. I miss the smell of sweat.. the loud ear blowing music when you get shoved up to close to the speakers. Everything, but mostly the punks. I have been wanting to take pictures of my punk ( Read more... )

I dont get it...When you seem to be the first thing on anyones mind.. Then your not even in their thoughts at all. you arent even somthing they worry about until you yell at them or leave...I cant sleep.I want Jenica, I want someone. I want him. But I dont want him If Im not the one he thinks about if Im not the one he calls or comes to see. If he ( Read more... )

* sings myself to sleep* Remember.. my.. favorite.. things...then I dont feel... so bad....