(no subject)
I have been thinking about many things lately.. about old friends and the shit they pulled and I didnt realize til now. the things I had let roll off my back that looking back on it I should of talked about it to them or at least threw a mini fit. The things I said sure alright to.. and how many times I jumped for them but they NEVER did for me. I tried to think of it from both sides that maybe I wasnt a good friend maybe I did suck? and I came to.. I did in alot of ways but in most I tried my best to be there for them. and they still picked others over me.. they still no matter what said things like oh.. ur just ONE of my best friends... or they implied that they just cared for me becase I was there for them not because they really care for me just because I was somthing they could rely on. something they knew wouldnt leave them and when I did.. I was the bad guy.. even tho I wasnt happy trying to make them better 24-7 and trying to make things work. being in the messed up web we called friendship. I wanted to say Im sorry now I just wanna move .. get away from this hell hole of a town. Get a bf/ gf and not look back. But I know I wont.. that I will be here for a while still.. I am too afraid of to many things. and no money. Not even sure why I am writing this.. no one will read it....