So years of holding shit in and thinking you can be ok... catches up and fast. I think in one night alone all my fears of just past things... came to a crash and put me in a ball in my basement crying... in the dark. Since now I have no one to write to I thought Id write to you oh journal of journals... so for once in my life I liked a guy just not ( Read more... )

so whats been going on with my mom has made me miss people I USED to be friends with... when shit wasnt all about drinking and sex and it was about photography... and fun.. random jokes and sayings movies and hiking god knows where... I miss that.. Some days I wish I could just see them without all the bullshit.. they why havent you called me's.. ( Read more... )

I havent written in here for month... so much has happened I cant even start to tell anyone how much shit I have dealt with.... Im so low right now but for some reason want to type it out.. I feel like if I type it out it wont be stuck in my head and I can ignore it for a moment. You ever find out in ur own heart you love someone? and u try to tell ( Read more... )

Im depressed.. I feel like all I do is work and sleep. 2-9 is a huge chunk out of my day. and not to mention I work on the weekend at the mall.. so I really have no time.. I havent seem my mom mom in about what 3 months? She is going to be pissed at me when I finally get there ( Read more... )

OK so I figured somthing out the other night sitting talking to my friend Amanda.. That I dont wanna date anyone for a long time right now I dont want anyone in my life... and I hate to say that but I dont.. I see the crap my friends are going threw.. with the people they love, either they are fighting with them or they are upset that they arent ( Read more... )

*Sings to myself* Im in a goood mood today and I dont know why.. well I KNOW why but yeah I wont say its stupid.. but I dont think ANYTHING could bring me down.. I was listening to that song somethings gotta go wrong bc Im feeling way to damn good .. and I was like soo true.. whats going to get fucked up now?! something will... just to freak me out ( Read more... )

OOOOooooh Im a happy camper... not going into detail but I am happpppy and I cant wait to seeee her... and IM HAAAAPPPPPY la la la.... want to tell the world.. * sighs* ok maybe just u guys... hehe but going to make u wait.. ;) if u wanna know.... IM me heheheh

I was asked a funny question that I will never forget. * quotes my friend* What do you want in life? After this question I sat there... staring at him. But it hit me the other day... I want to be happy.. I want a person I can be around 24-7 and care for... man or women. A friend, a lover I can trust, care for. But more importantly, care for me too ( Read more... )

I found myself cutting out coupons tonight... then out of the blue I look at the coupons ( for makeup and other little items) and realize.. I dont buy these things anyway. Why get coupons for things I dont BUY? Ahh... the things I do.

*sings* another friend down the drain... oh oh.. yeah yeah another friend down the drain...OOOOOOOoooooooo * goes off into a high pitch* I know I might not be perfect but I put myself threw shit for my friends. I try to help them out the best I can. The way we all do. And no matter what, I loose them. Am I to nice to them? can there be such a thing ( Read more... )