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the end
I will never be happy with David. he will never be the man of my dreams. he can't be that person, he is too damaged. I will always feel alone around him. he will always just talk at me and never with me. he thinks of himself most of the time, and I don't know why he chooses me. every conversation we have is always about him, and any conversation ( Read more... ) -
equation
so I have this equation I have been working on fer a long time. and every time I try to figure it out, I get the wrong answer. the problem is the equation seems to be undefined. basically the equation doesn't make sense. it makes me sad. David is never going to change. he doesn't learn new things and he doesn't grow. he is stuck in the mud right ( Read more... ) -
A random memory
I have not thought of this in over 20 to 25 years, and I am not sure what made me think of it now. I was outside having a cigarette in the cold, when I suddenly remembered I used to love doing hand springs. I would start off running to build up speed and then I would put my hands down and walk on them as far as I could go until I toppled over. It ( Read more... ) -
More than not...
I was watching an episode of Deep Space Nine. Warf and Dax are sent on a mission to help an informant escape the dominion. Dax gets injured and in the end Warf decides to abandon his mission to save Dax's life. I found the episode very touching. I felt like I knew I would do the same thing for David. However he looked at me with a smile and said he ( Read more... ) -
I could actually be happy
David Shirley, I have known him since junior high; he also happens to be one of my brother's best friends. So it was a little awkward when we started dating. And really, I can't say exactly why I got into the relationship. I was still trying to end an old one with Keith and rather unsuccessfully ( Read more... ) -
A vampire dream, for once I am the demon!
I had a dream that I was a demon, a vampire, a life drainer. I had fangs I could not hide, but I was accepted for what I was by the faceless friends I had in the dream. One of them was having a birthday party. Her house was a little disorganized and run down, but she wanted the party there. I told her I would help her, and she wanted to have the ( Read more... ) -
Valentine's Day...
Valentine's Day, that used to be one of my favoritest holidays... and back in the day when I was with my X-husband, it was my favorite day because it meant he would treat me well, spoil me even, for the entire day. Usually some sorta candy, dinner at some nice restaurant, and throughout the day, he would respect and generally treat me like a ( Read more... ) -
Fish out of Water
So I had to make my world smaller... it was just getting too big to handle. I stopped going to that online dating site. The one guy I did meet there, Mike... he happens to be on my facebook now, so he made it into my world... Also there is Lance... He was/is/always going to be in my world but only when he chooses to be. Dave Shirley, what a ( Read more... ) -
A year later and here I am
It is now 2011!!! Hard to believe it has been so long since I have written in here. I have thought about it a lot but with school, work, and kids, I just never seemed to find the moment. Now that I have a moment, I have a lot to say... I think... First of all, and most importantly, I have a boyfriend now. His name is Keith, and he is fantastic, ( Read more... ) -
Describe myself...?
Okay... a little about me. I am an artist at heart, but it is a hobby I don't spend enough time in. I go to MCC for nursing, and I work at a coffee shop around the corner. I live in Rochester City, but I tend to spend my time in Henrietta ( Read more... )