Meh... at the moment i hate being lonely... kinda wish i could cry... i don't even know why

Its 2009...i started this journal in January of 2005...i have been writing and blogging a long time about all types of things. It started just posting poems that i wrote after i broke up with johanna...I remember there was one that i wrote for someone that kinda started a crazy ball rolling that ended pretty bad, with me getting burned again. I ( Read more... )

So far my summer has stared out really well!!! Nana has been improved every day that i have been home...she has made leaps and bounds since saturday, which makes me very very happy!! Then my mom has been very good also, she has behaved herself like a champ too! Which is nice. Then best of all Farrah has been AMAZING towards me! Today she took ( Read more... )

My mother called tonight to update me on my Nana's condition. She has been stable after a scare and being moved to the ICU. They are hoping that they will be able to do the operation tomorrow if she stays stable all night. My mom was really making me angry tonight tho. She is constantly trying to play the victim. that makes me angry. She ( Read more... )

Tonight I'm feeling very stressed. There is finals this week and I have to start doing better...I'm already down and trying to build my GPA back up...but thats not what is really bothering me...Apparently last night Nana fell again and broke her hip...we don't know when she fell it could have been anytime during the night...she couldn't move and ( Read more... )

Tonight or technically this morning...i kinda feel angry and alone....two emotions that don't work well together....I feel them for mostly the same reason. I have a track meet today...first hammer competition of the season for me...basically its my time to shine considering i bit the big one during the weight throw...I was excited because my Dad ( Read more... )

Nana started chemo today...makes me really apritiate things in my life more...

I haven't posted anything in a really long time it feels like...I have been keeping a lot of things in...which can be all right...but not always....so I'm just gonna write a few things down ( Read more... )

So..today is my birthday..things have been all right for most of the day...things have been very random latley....between somehow finding myself in woonsocket randomly getting a new tattoo...just life in general...so here are some thoughts ( Read more... )

I'm a little upset... I called nana to see how her doctors appointment went and she said that she has to go for a heart/stress test...this test is to make sure that her body can physically handle the trauma of being operated on...she at least admitted to me its probably gonna be a partial removal..im guessing cancer of some sort...although she ( Read more... )