I told you when you said you loved me, I said, no, you don't, I said no, i said no to you, I told you not to, because I knew you didn't, you don't. I told you no so that you could just let it go, let it down, so could let it go. You didn't though, you held on so tightly tight enough to have your strong arms hold me down again. Your grip was so ( Read more... )

Have you ever imagined your funeral? I know you have an amazing life, and you are happier now than you ever used to be. That makes me incredibly happy, to see someone go from that to this, its hopefull you know? Andrew and I just had this silliest argument, in which i explained to him how I tend to bottle things up, blame myself you know? For ( Read more... )

My autumn eyes. What will I do without my autumn eyes? These oceans will dry out. Today, they will run over, flowing, flooding, flowing, over the porous surface, until they are dry, dark, and black, shallow and soon empty. Your autumn leaves will sift through the tides my waves will bring forth, waves of intent, to steal you, drown you, smother ( Read more... )

I don't know how to say this. You are on repeat. A once good song, over played, skipping, repeating, over and over, a downward spiral. I know you. You don't know me. You know nothing about me. Today when you told me you knew me better than anyone, my mind came to a hault. You don't know me. Even a little. You know what hurts me, you know ( Read more... )

So i'm supposed to sit here. Let you hurt me. Watch you. Moving, on and on and on. But myself? Not a chance? I'm supposed to sit and listen to you clarrify your want, your Need, to be with someone else, now or later, whenever, I'm supposed to listen to that. Know that. Hear it over and over. And let it be, be ok with it. But myself? I ( Read more... )

If I held my ground would you ask me to change? This drought bleeds on now we're dancing for rain. We drink the air but it’s still not the same. These worlds collide but the distance remains. We point the finger, never accept the blame and I know. I know.

The tide spins and stirs and surrounds me. Im suffocating. I can't swim, I toil. I can't breath, I flicker. It breaks me down and tugs at my toes, persuading me under. Deep and dark, and incredibly unknown. What I once admired in water, the abyss, the secrets it held, the darker the deeper, the further from the sun's revealing rays. It spew ( Read more... )

I dont love you.

I want to be with you again to convince myself it was okay to love you, it was worth loving you, it was worth anything, the hurt, and everything else, because it would mean it worked out in the end. And the fact that it wont work out in the end, is why I can not be your friend.

I can't sit still, I can't move. I do not know what I want from you. I know some things, but not all things, and some things can and will change, know that, be okay with that, and be open to the changes they will bring. I know you aren't the same. I know I can not blame myself, nor can I blame you. I know we need to sever the ties. I know I ( Read more... )

One month, one heart, one chance, who lost out? I don't see it, the bright lights burn my retna so. I can't see what it holds, whos arms are wrapped around whos waist, this is a waste. I'm melting, my mind can't handle this suspense, who will find me, I'm waiting. Forever, I will. Be what you believe. I am empty, I believe that. The doors have ( Read more... )