33. Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody.

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Some days you just have to write porn, for no other reason than that it's there. Warning NC-17. Duh. This is porn. No plot, just gratuitous sex between gay men.

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28. Don't take the batteries out of the other soldiers alarm clocks (Even if they do hit snooze about forty times).
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23. Must never ask anyone who outranks me if they've been smoking crack.
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18. May no longer perform my now (in)famous “Barbie Girl Dance” while on duty.
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12. Not allowed to join any militia.

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6. Not allowed to play “Pulp Fiction” with a suction-cup dart pistol and any officer.

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1)Not allowed to watch Westpark when I'm supposed to be working.

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Whiskey sweet on the back of his tongue. Burning hell fire to the pit of his stomach. A feeling he hadn’t experienced for almost four hundred years. He’d learned to sleep in the intervening years from cycle to cycle, jump to jump. It was a dreaming sleep not unlike the sleep Hojo put him under so long ago, though he didn’t bother with a coffin. The ( Read more... )

( Dark Jewels. Daemon. Witch. Everything has a price )