Check this out. Apparently Iran's crazy ass president, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, wants to be Iran's first astronaut. All I can say is I think we have another candidate for the sun shot.

Seats on the sunshot are going fast. At this rate, I'm going to need another rocket. (As a quick clarification, if you earn a seat on the sunshot, you are also Today's Asshat by default.) This column is so loathsome, it even displaces Rudy Giuliani claiming he "spent as much time around Ground Zero as the rescue workers." I'll give you the ( Read more... )

Also, in today's news, not only is Mitt Romney an asshat, he just earned himself a place on the sunshot. Governor Romney was asked, at a speech he was giving on how the military needs "a surge of support," why his five sons didn't join the surge, or the military for that matter. He said some stuff about life choices and a volunteer army, which is ( Read more... )

Wow! Paris Hilton hit the Daily Double today. Not only is she Today's Asshat, but she guaranteed her seat on the sun shot. Apparently, if various news services are to be believed, Paris Hilton is requesting a pardon for the charge, driving with a suspended license, for which she will serve a 45 day jail sentence. Her grounds: She provides hope ( Read more... )

I'm a big supporter of space exploration, and I have a very special goal for my Administration: the first manned mission to the Sun. I think there is much to be learned about how the Sun works and fusion in general. I also think it's a great way to get rid of extremely annoying people ( Read more... )