i dont really know what happened when i wrote that last entry, i was a lil destressed, i have to many emotions and i dont know what to with them. after i wrote that i wanted to cut myself, but i couldnt, it seemed like id got so far, i didnt wanna go back to sh, so i ended up scratching my body with a compass - you cant even se any marks now but it ( Read more... )

i dont care anymore. im just disqusted with myself. i keep telling myself im doing well, but im not. im just a useless fat blob, always saying the wrong things, the ugly one, letting the family down. ive just got a horrible sickly feeling with me, i know its self hatred getting to me, im stupid, i cant do anything im a fucking freak

soryy i havent wrote in here in a while, i was planning to yesterday but my internet broke! :( i was sooooo bored i ended up doing loads of colourisations on ArkSoft ( Read more... )

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Self-Injury: You are NOT the only one.
Monday, March 1, 2004 is SI Awareness Day.

today was the absolute worst day. ever. Lauren had bought me a christmas present, some really nice body lotin and some cute socks :p, i was showing my other friends them at break, and callum took them from me and started running around with them. i got really angry because he does this so many times, and i shouted at him to give them back. ( Read more... )

omg i totally fell out with rosie today - she's doing my head in ( Read more... )

i cant speak! yesterday i was pretty hoarse, and the day before i sounded like a man but now i can only speak in a lil croaky whisper! omg soooooo embarrasing! it is the morning though so mabie i'll feel better later.

i dont know what to say. its just getting so weired, i have so many emotions i cant handle. i think im geting ill, my stomach is hurting and im really light headed, i feel like im going to faint ( Read more... )

i dont know how i feel - im just confused and kind of upset. i dont know if its hormones or whatever, but everything is so hard. i feel like im trying so hard to please everybody but im just a failiure. my efforts arent being noticed and i dont feel like bothering anymore. im not getting anywhere in life. im not going to be able to do anything i ( Read more... )

im sorry i havent updated for a while - ive been real busy helping my mum with lots of stuff, and i havent found the privacy to write up until now (my parents dont know i have this)soooo lets start from the beginning ( Read more... )