Today was suppossed to be a great day. My family was in town for the OU Texas game and I was inviting friends over as well. Only one ended up coming. And all she did was watch me get all worked up over the game. My aunt was so into the game she basically ignored me. Nobody said goodbye to me when they left either. OU lost and that made me extremely ( Read more... )

I hate this feeling. There is no real damage control for what I've let myself do. I just can't see myself the way I used to...

And maybe If I could I wouldn't look so shitty.

Sometimes I feel so low that it seems to redifine the meaning ( Read more... )

I love you ( Read more... )

It's hard when you want someone, you want them really bad, or so it seems, and then you have them, and you find you don't want them anymore. You push them away. I thought it was because I was comparing all of the guys since John to John, but now I am thinking it's me. It's my problem. Maybe I'm afraid they wont treat me right, that's why I go for ( Read more... )

I just want to cry. I want to let it all out. But I am tired of sitting on my bathroom floor balling. I want someone fucking there. Someone who doesnt have to say anything, just someone to hold me. Maybe I'm too picky, but I want someone who I know could say something really meaningful to me if I wanted to hear it. Someone who will understand how ( Read more... )

It's sad to me that all it takes is one word from you, for me to lose all the progress I have made and suffered for. I'm really pissed because I thought I was stronger than that, but I guess I'm not. I'm still a fucking pathetic, easily swayed, dependant girl after all of that. After all that I was put through. After all of me thinking this changed ( Read more... )

Because of him my life had really gotten off track. He was all I could think about, I lost track of everything that had been important to me before. I ignored everything I had worked for. I'm so mad at myself. I can't forgive myself ( Read more... )

So...LIFE ( Read more... )

I can't let this get to me. If I let it show how badly I'm hurt he'll know how much he really meant to me. I don't want him to know how bad he'll hurt me. It will end me. I don't want to be denied. I can't go through this again, I just can't. There is only so much rejection I can take. HE DOESN'T like me. I know it. If he did he'd IM me, unless he' ( Read more... )