"Look at his little penis," Emily cried. "Isn't it adorable."
...
its a baby. its a minute old. its covered in blood and sweat and afterbirth and that weird white goo and its still got the umbilical cord and its like a tiny prune and the first thing you notice is--
I was beginning to think that this chapter was going to buck the trend and not be worse than 22/23. Yes, we've got the strange nudist bits at the most inappropriate times, but we're used to this by now. And then THAT.
Raise your glass to szaleniec, whom has survived the second "book" seemingly intact. Truly commendable. Onto tearing into this and hijacking your spork (and I don't mean to D: )
"You dress like a tramp, and who gets in trouble - my little brother? See in America, yeah she'd be dressed like a whore. However in Scotland she's dressed like a hobo.
And Dick is about as threatening as a Pillowpet. His schemes make no sense, are overcomplicated on the surface but boil down to "because I'm a jackass," and really has no motivation to be a bully other than the fact that Covenent of Nudists is just so damn perfect. He's an annoying antagonist not because the writer made us side against him, but because he's just so inefficiant.
Jamie's face turned insipid. This fic is insipid. The game I'm doing a screencap adventures of right now is less sexually charged than this and it's hentai.
But only males in his lineage ever had the gift. Why Emily?"Fun drinking game: Take a shot for every question you could answer with "Because she's a Sue." I am
( ... )
Raise your glass to szaleniec, whom has survived the second "book" seemingly intact. Truly commendable.
Cheers!
Onto tearing into this and hijacking your spork (and I don't mean to D: )
Go right ahead. You're more than welcome. :)
"Trying to help?" Hermione said incredulously. "How exactly does lying on top of my daughter and cupping her bare breasts qualify as helping?" Hey, it worked with you and Snape.
Heh, I totally didn't make this connection. Well played.
Was there anything in between "lol trelawny" and "MEANWHILE BACK AT CHATEAU NUDIST"? Because that's a jarring transition.
Nothing at all. I snipped a few lines, but it's the same scene.
I guess this is "we get pregnant" in the "we are a grandmother" sense At least in America "we get pregnant" refers to the mother. It's just a really weird way of saying it.It never caught on here to my knowledge. It would sound unbearably pretentious to British ears, because referring to yourself in the plural is traditionally the domain of royalty. (Cf. Queen Victoria's apocryphal "we
( ... )
Meanwhile, in America...sith_droidekaAugust 6 2013, 02:10:32 UTC
"Ladies and gentlemen," boomed Leon Trotsky, "feast your eyes on Isis Bowman!" The slightly-insane, part-communist part-capitalist archrival of Josef Stalin (and owner of half the magical industry of the Mexican states) was pointing at a haughty-looking woman made of twisted metal. She was staring down at the assembled crowd of politicians, businessmen, NNN students, and raptors and making lewd thrusts with her pelvis. "Tragically," Trotsky said, and he ushered the crowd past her, "the statue has started malfunctioning
( ... )
Re: Meanwhile, in America...szaleniec1000August 6 2013, 02:28:56 UTC
Nicely done, as ever. :) I wasn't sure at one point that I'd make it to the end. I've had quite a busy year, so my schedule hasn't been all that it could.
It's amazing how much Hogwarts Exposed can make you feel good about your own writing.
This is true. It's also instructive to see what doesn't work and why: I find myself thinking about my own writing a lot more since I started doing these.
Comments 65
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its a baby. its a minute old. its covered in blood and sweat and afterbirth and that weird white goo and its still got the umbilical cord and its like a tiny prune and the first thing you notice is--
SEEK HELP, NEIL.
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That moment might have hit me harder had I not read The Gang...
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Women's boobs do tend to get much perkier/firmer when they're pregnant, due to their milk coming in.
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"You dress like a tramp, and who gets in trouble - my little brother?
See in America, yeah she'd be dressed like a whore. However in Scotland she's dressed like a hobo.
And Dick is about as threatening as a Pillowpet. His schemes make no sense, are overcomplicated on the surface but boil down to "because I'm a jackass," and really has no motivation to be a bully other than the fact that Covenent of Nudists is just so damn perfect. He's an annoying antagonist not because the writer made us side against him, but because he's just so inefficiant.
Jamie's face turned insipid.
This fic is insipid. The game I'm doing a screencap adventures of right now is less sexually charged than this and it's hentai.
But only males in his lineage ever had the gift. Why Emily?"Fun drinking game: Take a shot for every question you could answer with "Because she's a Sue." I am ( ... )
Reply
Cheers!
Onto tearing into this and hijacking your spork (and I don't mean to D: )
Go right ahead. You're more than welcome. :)
"Trying to help?" Hermione said incredulously. "How exactly does lying on top of my daughter and cupping her bare breasts qualify as helping?"
Hey, it worked with you and Snape.
Heh, I totally didn't make this connection. Well played.
Was there anything in between "lol trelawny" and "MEANWHILE BACK AT CHATEAU NUDIST"? Because that's a jarring transition.
Nothing at all. I snipped a few lines, but it's the same scene.
I guess this is "we get pregnant" in the "we are a grandmother" sense
At least in America "we get pregnant" refers to the mother. It's just a really weird way of saying it.It never caught on here to my knowledge. It would sound unbearably pretentious to British ears, because referring to yourself in the plural is traditionally the domain of royalty. (Cf. Queen Victoria's apocryphal "we ( ... )
Reply
Is it just me, or is that like the weirdest thing to say to your best friend out of nowhere? "Yo, dude, check out my wife's righteous boobs."
Reply
Reply
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It's amazing how much Hogwarts Exposed can make you feel good about your own writing.
This is true. It's also instructive to see what doesn't work and why: I find myself thinking about my own writing a lot more since I started doing these.
Reply
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