SPN: Brotherly Manlove by Winchesters (18)
Chapter "Something Wicked" in the Catalogue of Touches between the Brothers Winchester. And in case you missed the previous installments:
Pilot. Wendigo. Dead In The Water. Phantom Traveler.
Bloody Mary. Skin. Hook Man. Bugs. Home. Asylum.
Scarecrow. Faith. Route 666. Nightmare. The Benders.
Shadow. Hell House.
Also, in case you missed it and feel like taking a brief detour: Shadow / Something Wicked. A random meta on Dean's emo, Sam's reaction and the push/pull of their languages. (Actually, because I rambled on their body language in that post, there's not so much commentary on Dean's big emo scene here. So please read that post, if you want a dorky in-depth look at it.)
...I wonder. Is it something in the acting, or in the content of the material itself, that the most complex of their language blend comes via the vulnerabilities of Dean? The way their languages clash and mesh during Sam's moments of angst is relatively straightforward in comparison. Have you ever noticed? Perhaps because that is their purest form? Little brother. Big brother. Everything is clear and as it's always been. Maybe they revert back to it naturally, or maybe they both make a choice on some level. I don't think it's as simple as saying that Sam's weakness and Dean's strength are both devoid of depth; they only are in execution, not in concept. But when they are presented as protector and protected from the pilot on, there's a greater sense of entering a forest, if you will, in stretching those roles beyond the box. Exploring what gives Sam strength and what takes Dean's away is intimate writing. Too much of it, of course, and we'll be standing in the middle of what was once a forest, now a dead pile of hacked-down trees. Still. I think when they get it right, they get it very right. Something Wicked wasn't that, wasn't perfect, but for all its anvils and its flaws, it got this one thing right.
Manlove.
What struck me is that, for the first episode since Home followed Bugs, their level of intrusion into and ease with each other's space followed the tone set by the previous episode without a hitch. Think back to Home being followed by Asylum. Asylum followed by Scarecrow. Scarecrow followed by Faith. And so on. There was a fluctuation, forward or back, each time since the initial clash in Asylum. It's as if they reached the rapids of the river they've been traveling, and sometimes the whitewater lifted them high, and sometimes they crashed against the rocks, but they never stayed level. Here? They did. They've come around the bend in the river, to the last quiet stretch of water before the falls. And, perhaps because of the emotional upheaval for Dean in this episode and how Sam responds to it, they will maintain this level of ease in Provenance and Dead Man's Blood. Mark it. It's the first time since the early days that they've reached level, solid ground. And even though they do not touch as much as I would have liked (and despite the fact that I can't meta on it completely right now, as it would ruin the nature of this particular study)... their manlove doesn't begin and end with the touch.
The theme of the SW manlove isn't contact. It's a level almost beyond touch. In-your-space.
Specifically: Sam in Dean's space. Despite the scarcity of actual touches, notice how many times in the course of the episode Sam tries to corner Dean physically. At first, Dean is receptive and easy with it, yet as the episode progresses, Dean begins to either slide away or shrug him off. That isn't all that's going on, and isn't entirely surprising given what Dean is going through, but it was interesting to me. Dean's touches are natural extensions of his emotional state. They grow increasingly less jokey after he realizes what he's dealing with, and the difference in his confidence and range is clear when you compare the pre-Shtriga ID twirl with the post-Shtriga touches. His touch grows tighter, but his personal space expands. And on Sam's end, he barely touches Dean at all, but he has grown to the point where he seems to almost take the physicality for granted once again, in a way that we saw left him feeling naked in Faith. Perhaps this is a direct result of the vulnerable starkness of Shadow as well as a progressive ease following the Asylum/ Scarecrow/ Faith experience. His personal space grows tighter, as Dean's expands, and he accommodates himself to meet what Dean needs.
Enough of that. On with the picspam.
BTW. As this is about brotherly manlove, John is once again not included. He won't be included in the posts for Dead Man's Blood, Salvation or Devil's Trap, either. Sorry. I'll get to him, I promise.
First, a gripe. Because, once again, they both very nonchalantly avoid touching when they have a perfect opportunity to do so. Thanks a lot, fellas. Truly.
Okay, another gripe. The wee!Winchesters don't touch. There is wee!manlove in the air (on Sam's end, at least; wee!Dean's actor must have watched TB to prep), but not a single touch.
About that: I found it sad yet intriguing how physically numb they both seemed to be. Dean, in the pilot and in the pictures of pre-Demon childhood, seemed to be a cuddly sort of kid. Somehow and despite the edge he's developed, he managed to hold onto that as an adult, but in this particular glimpse into their childhood, he seems already wary and weary. If this is, indeed, meant to be an indication of what their childhood was like as a rule... then I just have to wonder when and where and how he managed to find that physical joy and intimacy again. What happened to rekindle it? Sam, I can easily see growing to be non-touchy if this was the norm, but that's who he is. There's no real dichotomy, physically, between wee!Sam and adult!Sam. Dean isn't night and day, but enough to notice. Maybe this childhood would explain the tentative nature of some of Dean's touches and even the overt stuff in Bloody Mary and Home (like an echo of John here and presumably more than once in their childhood). It explains why they are both more likely to lean into each other's space than to hug outright. Stuff like the ass slap is an affected behavior of Dean's, just like his cocky attitude. Or, at least, it was at one point. His cockiness is in large part an act, but it's also part of his shell now. I think it became natural over time, as he grew into the role, just as his echoing of John's protection of Sam became a vital part of his physicality as a whole.
But how did he go from warm to world-weary? (At age 9 or 10! Even in their situation, that's a little bleak. To say nothing of wee!Sam's anesthetized stupor.) And what rekindled his inner Cuddles?
Shutting myself up now. On with the picspam.
p.s. Some of these caps are by the wonderful marishna.
My Media Player Classic decided to be grouchy yesterday.
18.0 Questionable
Type of Contact: Bulldozer
Deliberate?: Iffy
Chick Flick?: Nope
Note: Whether they actually touch or not is a little vague, but Sam's certainly crowding up against Dean and if they do touch, it's deliberate. Well... in an unconscious yet distinctly motivated sort of me-mighty-you-mouse attempt at intimidation. Does that classify as deliberate?
18.1
Type of Contact: Magic Trick
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: No
Note: Dean makes Sam's face disappear. And it's quite disturbing.
Dean as matador. (I'm not sure if Sam's the cape or the bull.)
On a somewhat serious note: notice how Dean uses Sam's forward motion to twirl him around. Technique. He uses his mad skillz rather than brute strength to manhandle Sam, once again.
18.2
Type of Contact: Traffic Signal
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: No
Note: Sam relies on Dean to navigate him, even in the rare instances that he is not mid-lecture and preoccupied. Sam is such a brain. Likely to wax poetic on the symbolic impact of marching to the beat of his own drum while simultaneously being corralled Man's Best Friend. ...Or maybe JP just dozed off during this, the nth take of walking down the hall. From his expression, it's hard to tell.
(Click for mini-dork attack. But you don't need it; Dean's hand is clearly visible. :))
(Yep, still touching, although I think he's just hanging on to Sam's jacket now. Which is cute.)
18.3
Type of Contact: Pep Pat
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: No
Note: Have you ever noticed how often Dean does this? And the utter non-reaction by Sam? He's not a pokey(?) type of person, Sam, but Dean is, and Sam must have been on the receiving end of this sort of pat hundreds of times growing up. It's cute and all, but it's also an unconscious reveal of Dean's feelings. Whether it's sharp and slightly challenging as it was in Wendigo, or light and encouraging as it is here, it's one of the little ways he seems to reassure himself that 1) Sam's here and 2) Dean's in control. I love how JA has worked that into his characterization, because it's a perfect blend of two of Dean's major qualities: the physicality and the insecurity.
Can someone make me an icon? Dean: *is pokey* or some variation.
Perhaps with an accompanying Sam icon? *not pokey* ...or something.
*is dork*
18.4
Type of Contact: In-your-space
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: THE chick flick moment of S1 ...perhaps?
Note: I covered this in depth in the Shadow / Something Wicked meta, so I won't go into it again. It's not truly a touch, but if I've counted this as a touch, and this and this and this, then Sam's gradual sweet crowding of Dean here is every bit as real a touch as anything that has come before it. We don't see their shoulders brush, but they might have, a bit. It doesn't really matter, though, if actual contact was made. Sometimes, it truly is the gesture that counts. And if "in-your-space" sums up the manlove in SW, then this is the perfect capture.
They actually come together twice in this scene. The first time is confrontational.
It actually starts out as an appeal on Dean's part. That's something I've noticed, and I don't want to swear by it or call it Dean's Law or something, but there's hardly a forward motion he makes that is not an appeal, outside of random action hero and/or expositional stuff.
Sam turns it confrontational. (Understandably, given what they're discussing.) But as a contrast, it's interesting to note that there's hardly a forward motion Sam makes that isn't confrontational, outside of lovey-dovey girlfriendy and/or expositional stuff.
It's really amazing how deep their individual characterization goes, with these tiny touches that are perhaps unplanned but consistently delivered. Every time I notice something else, it just blows me away. Neither one is gonna win an Oscar any time soon, but... y'know... they ain't half-bad.
Once Sam turns it confrontational, of course Dean responds. He has a tendency to turn away physically when something hits too close verbally. It's a tactic Sam has used as a detour in the past, and Dean is likely to use it less as an escape and more as a defeat. I say that because Dean Winchester just doesn't run away. I think this is more John's influence than his training at work. Dean will accept defeat. (Sometimes too readily.) He will bend over backwards. (Ditto.) And he will fight to the death if he believes he can or should win. (…Ditto?) But he never truly looks for an escape unless he has already accepted the defeat or given himself over to someone else's wish. That's how I'm reading his body (and other) language here, and I think I put it too simply in the other SW meta, by calling it an escape. When he turns away here, it's as much (if not more) an acknowledgment that his past failure has defeated him as it is a need to put some distance in between himself and Sam's probing.
In any case, Dean turns away from Sam, and it begins to feel like a would-be Emmy moment. It's got everything but the ghost of John dragging Dean down the street in chains, to be followed by Sam the Incredible Hunk sweeping him up in his arms and carrying him off to the nearest church, crying "Sanctuary!" (Stop looking at me like that. I watch too much Disney, okay?)
But seriously.
Sam wonders what ever happened to baby Dean. In other news: Dean tries, without success, to control the All Your Fault Are Belong To Us voice in his head.
...I'm being serious. And not a word on where that voice originated.
Um, moving on. It is still confrontational on Sam's part, but gently and out of a personal concern. As I mentioned in the other meta, unlike the situation in Shadow, he's not making a stand here. And being free of that weight enables him not only to coax Dean out deliberately but also to hear what he is about to confess without a preset answer (read: self-defense) to fall back on.
Dean has meanwhile drawn near again. He did that in Shadow, too, but as I mentioned before, there is a slightly different push/pull going on here. When Dean drew near in Shadow, he was hungry for their intimacy, begging for it. When he draws near in SW, he isn't begging, nor is he starving. He just needs it. In both cases, that physical closeness is the solid ground beneath his feet. He needs it before he can meet Sam in the middle ground or even attempt to cross over into Sam's territory. So he steps close.
It's him taking a sip of water before speaking. A basic need that costs nothing to take or to give.
The post-flashback reveal that Sam is sitting beside Dean is beautiful no matter how you look at it. There's really not much more to say, other than it doesn't matter a hill of beans whether they're brushing shoulders symbolically or in actuality. Whether Sam is allowing Dean to drink freely from his presence, or whether he's answering an unspoken need of his own to feel connected somehow to this history he can't remember... it's all in our individual interpretations. Whatever the case, JP played it beautifully and putting aside the snark about voices in Dean's head, it's lovely to see Sam hearing him. And to see that he remembers it, later, when it matters the most.
This is what was missing in The Benders. They never connected.
One thing: go back, if you haven't, and re-watch that fade-in from the flashback. Notice the timing, as Dean finishes up his story. If you've read the other meta, you know what I'm talking about. It's a little touch of grace, perhaps unintentional but perfectly timed, all the same.
The scene ends on Dean getting up and walking away, and although it's less of an "escape" this time, it's still a defeat. One of the saddest things about it, I think (and this is just my measly .02 cents on the matter), is that the Shtriga matter ends with Dean still defeated by his past failure. He didn't achieve any sort of enlightenment, and Sam was not able to heal the wound or silence the overwhelming guilt. Still, this moment isn't only to be remembered by Sam. Dean will remember it, as well, and rely on it to some degree in scenes down the road. Not so much on the content of what they discussed, but on the level at which they discussed it.
...Okay, so maybe I wasn't as talked out about that scene as I thought I was. Whoops!
Honorary Mention
18.4 (Coda)
Type of Contact: Eye
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: Oh, yeah.
Note: An epic manlovin' scene like 18.4 needs popcorn, yeah?
Sam: *groks Dean's suffering; offers mea culpa*
Dean: *feels his metaphorical spoon tingle*
(...Willya stop? That's only dirty if you look for it.)
18.5 Questionable
Type of Contact: Half-Snuggle
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: No
Note: I'm pretty sure this isn't an actual touch, but since it was the scene which originally drew my attention to Sam's manly arm- gesture tendency, I felt it was worth mentioning. And, well. There has been this little trend here with Sam putting his arm up along the back of the seat whenever Dean is feeling vulnerable, whether he stretches it out to touch Dean's back or not. Perhaps I shouldn't put so much stock in it. Perhaps it's coincidental. But I see it as a deliberate extension of Sam's feelings by JP, and I will fanwank love every single occurrence of it. :)
Well, that's it.
A little disappointing on the touching side of things, but as far as manlove goes... how can you go wrong? This puts would-be manlove ep extraordinaire The Benders to shame. Somehow, and this might just be me, the verbal anvils were softened by the dearth of actual touches. Had the touching matched the verbal emo, had it been more like Bloody Mary or Home than like Route 666, I think all of that emo combined would have been irreparably maudlin. It tests the limit enough as it is. But these small and unsung physical gestures keep all of the epic emoting grounded. The manlove here isn't captured in the heavy angst or the flashy life-saving. It's in the shadows. Dean stepping close. Sam sitting. JA's delivery of "Yeah, I would." How JP played Sam's reaction.
And if the light-hearted pranks of Hell House brought them back around to easy camaraderie at long last and reaffirmed their friendship, then it is Something Wicked which brings them back around to the ground they'd reached in Nightmare and redefines them as brothers. These two episodes combined, HH & SW, will make Provenance possible, which will in turn prepare them for what will come in Salvation and Devil's Trap and for the choices they each will make.
I am so in love with their season-long journey and how it has all flowed together. Words fail. [/broken record]
Provenance is next.
(Only four episodes left. *feels weepy* Is it September yet?)
Pilot. Wendigo. Dead In The Water. Phantom Traveler.
Bloody Mary. Skin. Hook Man. Bugs. Home. Asylum.
Scarecrow. Faith. Route 666. Nightmare. The Benders.
Shadow. Hell House.
Also, in case you missed it and feel like taking a brief detour: Shadow / Something Wicked. A random meta on Dean's emo, Sam's reaction and the push/pull of their languages. (Actually, because I rambled on their body language in that post, there's not so much commentary on Dean's big emo scene here. So please read that post, if you want a dorky in-depth look at it.)
...I wonder. Is it something in the acting, or in the content of the material itself, that the most complex of their language blend comes via the vulnerabilities of Dean? The way their languages clash and mesh during Sam's moments of angst is relatively straightforward in comparison. Have you ever noticed? Perhaps because that is their purest form? Little brother. Big brother. Everything is clear and as it's always been. Maybe they revert back to it naturally, or maybe they both make a choice on some level. I don't think it's as simple as saying that Sam's weakness and Dean's strength are both devoid of depth; they only are in execution, not in concept. But when they are presented as protector and protected from the pilot on, there's a greater sense of entering a forest, if you will, in stretching those roles beyond the box. Exploring what gives Sam strength and what takes Dean's away is intimate writing. Too much of it, of course, and we'll be standing in the middle of what was once a forest, now a dead pile of hacked-down trees. Still. I think when they get it right, they get it very right. Something Wicked wasn't that, wasn't perfect, but for all its anvils and its flaws, it got this one thing right.
Manlove.
What struck me is that, for the first episode since Home followed Bugs, their level of intrusion into and ease with each other's space followed the tone set by the previous episode without a hitch. Think back to Home being followed by Asylum. Asylum followed by Scarecrow. Scarecrow followed by Faith. And so on. There was a fluctuation, forward or back, each time since the initial clash in Asylum. It's as if they reached the rapids of the river they've been traveling, and sometimes the whitewater lifted them high, and sometimes they crashed against the rocks, but they never stayed level. Here? They did. They've come around the bend in the river, to the last quiet stretch of water before the falls. And, perhaps because of the emotional upheaval for Dean in this episode and how Sam responds to it, they will maintain this level of ease in Provenance and Dead Man's Blood. Mark it. It's the first time since the early days that they've reached level, solid ground. And even though they do not touch as much as I would have liked (and despite the fact that I can't meta on it completely right now, as it would ruin the nature of this particular study)... their manlove doesn't begin and end with the touch.
The theme of the SW manlove isn't contact. It's a level almost beyond touch. In-your-space.
Specifically: Sam in Dean's space. Despite the scarcity of actual touches, notice how many times in the course of the episode Sam tries to corner Dean physically. At first, Dean is receptive and easy with it, yet as the episode progresses, Dean begins to either slide away or shrug him off. That isn't all that's going on, and isn't entirely surprising given what Dean is going through, but it was interesting to me. Dean's touches are natural extensions of his emotional state. They grow increasingly less jokey after he realizes what he's dealing with, and the difference in his confidence and range is clear when you compare the pre-Shtriga ID twirl with the post-Shtriga touches. His touch grows tighter, but his personal space expands. And on Sam's end, he barely touches Dean at all, but he has grown to the point where he seems to almost take the physicality for granted once again, in a way that we saw left him feeling naked in Faith. Perhaps this is a direct result of the vulnerable starkness of Shadow as well as a progressive ease following the Asylum/ Scarecrow/ Faith experience. His personal space grows tighter, as Dean's expands, and he accommodates himself to meet what Dean needs.
Enough of that. On with the picspam.
BTW. As this is about brotherly manlove, John is once again not included. He won't be included in the posts for Dead Man's Blood, Salvation or Devil's Trap, either. Sorry. I'll get to him, I promise.
First, a gripe. Because, once again, they both very nonchalantly avoid touching when they have a perfect opportunity to do so. Thanks a lot, fellas. Truly.
Okay, another gripe. The wee!Winchesters don't touch. There is wee!manlove in the air (on Sam's end, at least; wee!Dean's actor must have watched TB to prep), but not a single touch.
About that: I found it sad yet intriguing how physically numb they both seemed to be. Dean, in the pilot and in the pictures of pre-Demon childhood, seemed to be a cuddly sort of kid. Somehow and despite the edge he's developed, he managed to hold onto that as an adult, but in this particular glimpse into their childhood, he seems already wary and weary. If this is, indeed, meant to be an indication of what their childhood was like as a rule... then I just have to wonder when and where and how he managed to find that physical joy and intimacy again. What happened to rekindle it? Sam, I can easily see growing to be non-touchy if this was the norm, but that's who he is. There's no real dichotomy, physically, between wee!Sam and adult!Sam. Dean isn't night and day, but enough to notice. Maybe this childhood would explain the tentative nature of some of Dean's touches and even the overt stuff in Bloody Mary and Home (like an echo of John here and presumably more than once in their childhood). It explains why they are both more likely to lean into each other's space than to hug outright. Stuff like the ass slap is an affected behavior of Dean's, just like his cocky attitude. Or, at least, it was at one point. His cockiness is in large part an act, but it's also part of his shell now. I think it became natural over time, as he grew into the role, just as his echoing of John's protection of Sam became a vital part of his physicality as a whole.
But how did he go from warm to world-weary? (At age 9 or 10! Even in their situation, that's a little bleak. To say nothing of wee!Sam's anesthetized stupor.) And what rekindled his inner Cuddles?
Shutting myself up now. On with the picspam.
p.s. Some of these caps are by the wonderful marishna.
My Media Player Classic decided to be grouchy yesterday.
18.0 Questionable
Type of Contact: Bulldozer
Deliberate?: Iffy
Chick Flick?: Nope
Note: Whether they actually touch or not is a little vague, but Sam's certainly crowding up against Dean and if they do touch, it's deliberate. Well... in an unconscious yet distinctly motivated sort of me-mighty-you-mouse attempt at intimidation. Does that classify as deliberate?
18.1
Type of Contact: Magic Trick
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: No
Note: Dean makes Sam's face disappear. And it's quite disturbing.
Dean as matador. (I'm not sure if Sam's the cape or the bull.)
On a somewhat serious note: notice how Dean uses Sam's forward motion to twirl him around. Technique. He uses his mad skillz rather than brute strength to manhandle Sam, once again.
18.2
Type of Contact: Traffic Signal
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: No
Note: Sam relies on Dean to navigate him, even in the rare instances that he is not mid-lecture and preoccupied. Sam is such a brain. Likely to wax poetic on the symbolic impact of marching to the beat of his own drum while simultaneously being corralled Man's Best Friend. ...Or maybe JP just dozed off during this, the nth take of walking down the hall. From his expression, it's hard to tell.
(Click for mini-dork attack. But you don't need it; Dean's hand is clearly visible. :))
(Yep, still touching, although I think he's just hanging on to Sam's jacket now. Which is cute.)
18.3
Type of Contact: Pep Pat
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: No
Note: Have you ever noticed how often Dean does this? And the utter non-reaction by Sam? He's not a pokey(?) type of person, Sam, but Dean is, and Sam must have been on the receiving end of this sort of pat hundreds of times growing up. It's cute and all, but it's also an unconscious reveal of Dean's feelings. Whether it's sharp and slightly challenging as it was in Wendigo, or light and encouraging as it is here, it's one of the little ways he seems to reassure himself that 1) Sam's here and 2) Dean's in control. I love how JA has worked that into his characterization, because it's a perfect blend of two of Dean's major qualities: the physicality and the insecurity.
Can someone make me an icon? Dean: *is pokey* or some variation.
Perhaps with an accompanying Sam icon? *not pokey* ...or something.
*is dork*
18.4
Type of Contact: In-your-space
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: THE chick flick moment of S1 ...perhaps?
Note: I covered this in depth in the Shadow / Something Wicked meta, so I won't go into it again. It's not truly a touch, but if I've counted this as a touch, and this and this and this, then Sam's gradual sweet crowding of Dean here is every bit as real a touch as anything that has come before it. We don't see their shoulders brush, but they might have, a bit. It doesn't really matter, though, if actual contact was made. Sometimes, it truly is the gesture that counts. And if "in-your-space" sums up the manlove in SW, then this is the perfect capture.
They actually come together twice in this scene. The first time is confrontational.
It actually starts out as an appeal on Dean's part. That's something I've noticed, and I don't want to swear by it or call it Dean's Law or something, but there's hardly a forward motion he makes that is not an appeal, outside of random action hero and/or expositional stuff.
Sam turns it confrontational. (Understandably, given what they're discussing.) But as a contrast, it's interesting to note that there's hardly a forward motion Sam makes that isn't confrontational, outside of lovey-dovey girlfriendy and/or expositional stuff.
It's really amazing how deep their individual characterization goes, with these tiny touches that are perhaps unplanned but consistently delivered. Every time I notice something else, it just blows me away. Neither one is gonna win an Oscar any time soon, but... y'know... they ain't half-bad.
Once Sam turns it confrontational, of course Dean responds. He has a tendency to turn away physically when something hits too close verbally. It's a tactic Sam has used as a detour in the past, and Dean is likely to use it less as an escape and more as a defeat. I say that because Dean Winchester just doesn't run away. I think this is more John's influence than his training at work. Dean will accept defeat. (Sometimes too readily.) He will bend over backwards. (Ditto.) And he will fight to the death if he believes he can or should win. (…Ditto?) But he never truly looks for an escape unless he has already accepted the defeat or given himself over to someone else's wish. That's how I'm reading his body (and other) language here, and I think I put it too simply in the other SW meta, by calling it an escape. When he turns away here, it's as much (if not more) an acknowledgment that his past failure has defeated him as it is a need to put some distance in between himself and Sam's probing.
In any case, Dean turns away from Sam, and it begins to feel like a would-be Emmy moment. It's got everything but the ghost of John dragging Dean down the street in chains, to be followed by Sam the Incredible Hunk sweeping him up in his arms and carrying him off to the nearest church, crying "Sanctuary!" (Stop looking at me like that. I watch too much Disney, okay?)
But seriously.
Sam wonders what ever happened to baby Dean. In other news: Dean tries, without success, to control the All Your Fault Are Belong To Us voice in his head.
...I'm being serious. And not a word on where that voice originated.
Um, moving on. It is still confrontational on Sam's part, but gently and out of a personal concern. As I mentioned in the other meta, unlike the situation in Shadow, he's not making a stand here. And being free of that weight enables him not only to coax Dean out deliberately but also to hear what he is about to confess without a preset answer (read: self-defense) to fall back on.
Dean has meanwhile drawn near again. He did that in Shadow, too, but as I mentioned before, there is a slightly different push/pull going on here. When Dean drew near in Shadow, he was hungry for their intimacy, begging for it. When he draws near in SW, he isn't begging, nor is he starving. He just needs it. In both cases, that physical closeness is the solid ground beneath his feet. He needs it before he can meet Sam in the middle ground or even attempt to cross over into Sam's territory. So he steps close.
It's him taking a sip of water before speaking. A basic need that costs nothing to take or to give.
The post-flashback reveal that Sam is sitting beside Dean is beautiful no matter how you look at it. There's really not much more to say, other than it doesn't matter a hill of beans whether they're brushing shoulders symbolically or in actuality. Whether Sam is allowing Dean to drink freely from his presence, or whether he's answering an unspoken need of his own to feel connected somehow to this history he can't remember... it's all in our individual interpretations. Whatever the case, JP played it beautifully and putting aside the snark about voices in Dean's head, it's lovely to see Sam hearing him. And to see that he remembers it, later, when it matters the most.
This is what was missing in The Benders. They never connected.
One thing: go back, if you haven't, and re-watch that fade-in from the flashback. Notice the timing, as Dean finishes up his story. If you've read the other meta, you know what I'm talking about. It's a little touch of grace, perhaps unintentional but perfectly timed, all the same.
The scene ends on Dean getting up and walking away, and although it's less of an "escape" this time, it's still a defeat. One of the saddest things about it, I think (and this is just my measly .02 cents on the matter), is that the Shtriga matter ends with Dean still defeated by his past failure. He didn't achieve any sort of enlightenment, and Sam was not able to heal the wound or silence the overwhelming guilt. Still, this moment isn't only to be remembered by Sam. Dean will remember it, as well, and rely on it to some degree in scenes down the road. Not so much on the content of what they discussed, but on the level at which they discussed it.
...Okay, so maybe I wasn't as talked out about that scene as I thought I was. Whoops!
Honorary Mention
18.4 (Coda)
Type of Contact: Eye
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: Oh, yeah.
Note: An epic manlovin' scene like 18.4 needs popcorn, yeah?
Sam: *groks Dean's suffering; offers mea culpa*
Dean: *feels his metaphorical spoon tingle*
(...Willya stop? That's only dirty if you look for it.)
18.5 Questionable
Type of Contact: Half-Snuggle
Deliberate?: Yes
Chick Flick?: No
Note: I'm pretty sure this isn't an actual touch, but since it was the scene which originally drew my attention to Sam's manly arm- gesture tendency, I felt it was worth mentioning. And, well. There has been this little trend here with Sam putting his arm up along the back of the seat whenever Dean is feeling vulnerable, whether he stretches it out to touch Dean's back or not. Perhaps I shouldn't put so much stock in it. Perhaps it's coincidental. But I see it as a deliberate extension of Sam's feelings by JP, and I will fanwank love every single occurrence of it. :)
Well, that's it.
A little disappointing on the touching side of things, but as far as manlove goes... how can you go wrong? This puts would-be manlove ep extraordinaire The Benders to shame. Somehow, and this might just be me, the verbal anvils were softened by the dearth of actual touches. Had the touching matched the verbal emo, had it been more like Bloody Mary or Home than like Route 666, I think all of that emo combined would have been irreparably maudlin. It tests the limit enough as it is. But these small and unsung physical gestures keep all of the epic emoting grounded. The manlove here isn't captured in the heavy angst or the flashy life-saving. It's in the shadows. Dean stepping close. Sam sitting. JA's delivery of "Yeah, I would." How JP played Sam's reaction.
And if the light-hearted pranks of Hell House brought them back around to easy camaraderie at long last and reaffirmed their friendship, then it is Something Wicked which brings them back around to the ground they'd reached in Nightmare and redefines them as brothers. These two episodes combined, HH & SW, will make Provenance possible, which will in turn prepare them for what will come in Salvation and Devil's Trap and for the choices they each will make.
I am so in love with their season-long journey and how it has all flowed together. Words fail. [/broken record]
Provenance is next.
(Only four episodes left. *feels weepy* Is it September yet?)