This journal has seen four years of my life pass, from when I started it at sixteen and angsty through my entire last years as (legally anyway) a teenager ( Read more... )

in a way i want to tell myself that i am not capable of trying to keep him from coming apart when i'm not sure yet the extent of the damage to my own parts ( Read more... )

I did it: I called Subway this morning and let Mrs. Debbi know I'll no longer be working there. As I figured, I felt a little guilty because I mean, I like Mrs. Debbi and at the end of the day I don't hate working there, but all these missed classes and lab hours are going to do fucked up things to my already bad grades as it is and though I ( Read more... )

today was chaotic. i worked eleven to six, so i went in there and to my shock it was sort of slow at first-- weird considering i expected the breakfast rush to have absolutely flooded the place, but i guess the so-called "severe weather" we're expected to have chased a lot of people off; i suited up and got a bit of a dressing down from mrs. debbi ( Read more... )

by the end of the day now i'm tired so it doesn't matter anymore but these mornings of quiet terror and choking back tears make me wish i could sleep for days and standing behind the counter at work sometimes i look around me for a second and realize i have no clue where i am or what i'm doing or what the people around me are saying, i don't know ( Read more... )

I don't know, the same lines from that Kelly Rowland song keep getting stuck in my head. They have been for years now, actually. And since I don't know all the words it doesn't help much, haha ( Read more... )

the lack of updating to this makes me slightly ashamed. but the simple fact is that due to what was going on i have not thought to write here ( Read more... )

i dreamed of them ( Read more... )

i closed my eyes and found that once again it was violent and sharp and i felt confused; why is it suddenly so good that it hurts, and where did it come from? is it somehow because of him?
strangest of all is that i stroked myself to a second orgasm and he entered my thoughts as my mouth opened and i thought of only a couple of nights ago with my ( Read more... )

today he leaves ( Read more... )