When you felt as though I wasn't giving you an option....you blew up at me, no discussion, no levelheaded calm conversation. Just full on sarcasm, bitterness, and what felt like hatred towards none other than me. You don't hate me....but you make me feel like it every time your aggravated or frustrated. Every time you're mad at me, you talk to ( Read more... )

Ally, you spoke briefly about me trying to find something out there....how it made you jealous....I feel so jealous everyday dear....you and Jen had that date...and no matter how good or bad it was...you were still HER date and that stung more than I thought it would. I about cried when you hugged me before they got here. I was so proud of you... ( Read more... )

I hate complaining, I really do....but fuck am I tired all the time. And stressed more often it seems. Ally won't even come to bed at a decent hour anymore because of me. I apparently move around so much and talk from a restless slumber that she can't handle it..... I hate myself for that because I am comforted by her cuddling in next to me and I ( Read more... )

I am so tired of being invisible. The feeling of being able to transcend society without notice used to be amazing. I hated being noticed, ya know being invisible in the real world outside of raves and rocky was perfect for me. The problem is that when I was invisible before, all of my friends were invisible with me.....now I'm the only one who is ( Read more... )

Each morning I wake up happy above all else.This morning when I woke up we were holding hands, legs intertwined to one another, you as my little spoon.  I usually wake up to some variation of that each day, whether my hand is splayed about your delicate stomach, or youre laying your head upon my shoulder with your arms around me. One of the ( Read more... )

But I am not selfish....so I ignore what I want and need on a pretty regular basis. It is my goal in life to keep others happy and at peace....even in my darkest of hours...or thiers.

Right now it seems like I just need something.....fuck maybe I ignore myself because I cannot articulate what I need.

A hug, a comfort, a smile, a simple action, a ( Read more... )

I wake up next to the most beautiful woman, inside and out, that I have ever met.

And I am so incredibly lucky to be near her each day, so much so that I want to talk about it...figure it all out.... but I need someone else to talk to. It is too much for me to ask you to listen to me talk about the way I feel ALL THE TIME. I have become more of a ( Read more... )

How I love thee so. I don't want be who I am anymore if it means that I am going to lose you over it. I want to be the woman you love who loves you for being the amazingly beautiful woman you are. As I look out over our bedroom, the sunlight hits your delicate face as if to show me the beauty I already see in you everyday. As your touseled hair ( Read more... )

I wake up and realize even more that you are the only one who cares for me enough to be here in this way.....dealing with my body, heart and mind the way it twists and turns as if I have become the winding road to oz. I feel lucky to have you here. To wake me up and give me my meds, keep a watch over me, be jealous and cautious when random others ( Read more... )

I had been thinking about this since we got the package and I feel like an asshole, prick, selfish, jealous, bitch for even thinking the words below. I typed it out to her and realized that I can't break someone's hopes, dreams, and heart like this....even if I am respectful. I never sent it.....don't think I would.....but I'm going to be late to ( Read more... )