Flying to Sunnyland from Silverstag Eco Hamlet
Wednesday, February 24th 2016
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Getting there was complicated. Wednesday was a five-hour wait at the local airport near Silverstag Eco Hamlet which climaxed with getting off my (very) delayed plane in exchange for an $800.00 voucher which I could use on future flights. Seeing as how my round-trip cost had ( Read more... )

Sub-Title: Shameless, Immortal, A Goddess Embodied on Earth
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"What feeling do you want to have?" Teal asks in her video, How To Feel Better; Feeling Signatures.
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I want to feel entirely safe and loved. I want to feel like anything I want is only moments, days or weeks away. I want to feel like my imagination really is the limit. I want to feel my ( Read more... )

"Muscle imbalance is another way we reflect reality," I wrote to Paladin. I was thinking of Oryx's arms, which were very large in comparison to the rest of her body, and how Paladin's had been similar when I met him, but balanced out over the first year of our relationship. "Arms represent external interactions," I continued, thinking of how ( Read more... )

The morning after Thanksgiving I was a mess. I wanted to high-tail out of Snowland, but I also didn't want to be hasty and miss the opportunity to cart things with me from Snowland to Silverstag Eco Hamlet.
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My voice was still unusable.
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"To Paladin: Well, this is infuriating," I wrote, gesturing Paladin to come see what I was typing at my laptop, "I ( Read more... )

As sick as I felt Wednesday, I still hoped that Thursday morning I would make it to flow-yoga on Thanksgiving morning. When I woke I felt awful. I put the idea from my mind. Still I hoped to make it to the potluck I had organized that evening. One way or another, I'd decided that I was leaving Snowland the next morning. It would mean bailing on ( Read more... )

After Hibiscus left for his weekend trip I found my mood changing rapidly. Where I had been giddy, now I was lost. Where I had been aroused, now I was tried. Where I had been excited, now I was tentative. Where I had been wise, now I was desolate. Where I had been angry, now I was weeping.
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Saturday evening I curled up on Hibiscus's bed and Paladin ( Read more... )

I'm starting to become myself again, I thought. As deeply as I missed Paladin, it was nice to reclaim myself. My inner child was coming forth in more and more ways.
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Saturday I began writing a fantasy novel again for the first time in over four years. It was something I thought I couldn't do as long as I kept up that mindset of having to work. But ( Read more... )

I was watching Teal's trailer for a movie about herself. It showed her asking a friend to plug something in.
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Teal said, "I still have difficulty plugging things in because of the electro-torture that I went through as a child."
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I found myself dumbfounded. I almost always asked Paladin to plug and unplug things. For years this had bothered me, but I ( Read more... )

The end of July was fast approaching. I'd been traveling so long, that traveling felt like my natural state of being.
.( Our traveling history... )

I was in my mom's sewing room, crying. I think I was hiding. My mother came in. At first I pouted, unwilling to tell her what I was feeling.
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"Come on," she said in exasperation. "Tell me what's going on. I can't help if you won't talk to me."
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My breaths came in pants. I felt like I couldn't get in enough air. I began to shake. Words began to bubble ( Read more... )