Torchwood: Exorcism

[notevery]

It is all the fault of the fucking French boy.  Or rather, it is all the fault of the French boy Jack is fucking.

Not that Ianto is jealous.  Why would he be?  Not after what happened-not after what Jack did to Lisa.  Not even weeks afterwards, not even when Jack has been so polite, so eager to conquer Ianto’s heart and mind, win him back into the

Comments

[hellenebright]

As miss_zedem says, very well written and powerful, but just slightly....

I'm not sure I can imagine Jack concatenating sex and power in that way - "I'll prove who is in charge here by making you submit sexually" is to me too much a product of our own times and attitudes for it to fit. And there's nothing in canon!Ianto that suggests to me that he would react to being hit in any way other than to hit back.

But then exploring those alternatives is one of the rightful roles of fiction, and there's no way your very strong work is invalidated by my squickiness.

[notevery]

Thank you for the detailed comment! It's massively appreciated: I love to be told what could have been better/was good/etc., and your comments are really perceptive and definitely made me think--always a good thing! You might be interested in how I replied to miss_zedem above, since her point is similar, but I'll answer your specific points here, too.

First off, the punching (or not). As I said to miss_zedem, I'm more than happy to admit that a punch would have been extremely possible, and I only narrowly chose over not including a return-punch myself, for reasons I explained above (but not, I think, very coherently: my brain seems to be mush this morning). My main motive for not including it was Ianto's shock--I didn't believe that even with an angry Jack he would expect to be punched; Ianto was certainly caught up in his own (justified) rant at the time--; however, I can see how this is a weak part of the story and I'll definitely keep that in mind

[hellenebright]

As miss_zedem says, thanks for taking this in a great spirit (and not punching my lights out :). Having read your notes on where you were going in this fic, I think maybe the problem is that *I'm* a 20th century gal(since I was born in the 1950's, I can't really describe myself as 21st century), so I am putting a particular spin on things that you never intended to be there

[notevery]

Least I could do! As I said to miss_zedem, I have to admit that I'm a fan of concrit.

Jack isn't sending a message here, he actually isn't attempting to be dominant - he's just lost it like the kid in the playground that's just been called a wanker.

That explains what I was trying to say three billion times better than I managed it, and it was several times more concise, too. I was trying to convey a situation that's definitely dubious, but comes out on the side of angry people being aggressive rather than someone trying to express control in an entire interpersonal relationship.

Agreed, Ianto most likely wouldn't be Catholic even if he were religious--and also self-harm in all its forms is a really understandable squick to have! I can see an argument for that being too much authorial interference there, if that phrase makes sense: I'm an atheist, but I do have a weakness for the absolution-through-pain idea (and for the inner-peace-through-hard-work concept, so I may not be a religious person but have clearly inherited some of religion's

[silversolitaire]

Fantastically written. I wish I had your command of words. I am in awe.

[notevery]

Thank you very, very much for such a lovely comment--that's very kind of you, and I'm intensely flattered.

[louiex]

This was just.. wow. All kinds of hot and good and really well done. I love the jumping train of thought that you've given Ianto here. A very effective tool for this story.

Can't wait to read it again!

[notevery]

Thank you! I'm really glad to hear the style worked--I wasn't sure about it at the time, and was worried that the 'jumping' that you referred to would make the style seem clunky and disjointed. I'm glad it didn't!

(Also, your icon makes me giggle. It's so true.)

[democrat]

Wow, I loved it.
Terribly well written.

[notevery]

Thank you!

[sarcasticchick]

guh.

if you need me, i'll be in my bunk....

absolutely lovely angry sex between two equally absolutely angry people.

*waves a hand to gesture words*

[notevery]

*grins* Thank you so much! I'm really glad to hear that you liked it.