Girlie, you're amazing! I haven't seen you on LJ lately but I feel your presence in my life. Today I got the book AA: Not The Only Way in the mail and was so excited! I'm still working through Moderation Management and although I haven't started a 30 day, I haven't had a drink since I got back home which is a good thing. I'm thinking what I'd ( Read more... )

Went to work at my summer job and found myself looking forward to it. I wish they'd schedule me more, although I know once my mom gets back into town I'll be needed at home a lot more. Still taking the dog on long walks most nights ( Read more... )

Over the past week I've moved back to my hometown, visited friends, ran errands, tried to clean my room to make it liveable, and tried to organize a garage sale. I feel like a total fuck up. I keep doing things, and sucking down my feelings, but I miss my school! I miss feeling like I actually have a purpose in this life. I feel like such a ( Read more... )

This week has been a whirlwind. I drank a little yesterday, one of the teachers brought mimosa fixings to the teacher work day. My friend drove up from Orlando yesterday, so when she arrived I made a point of not drinking. We did several social visits and packed my stuff last night before passing out! I'm up early, can't sleep anymore. I read ( Read more... )

I feel so sad and empty and hopeless when I'm alone. It's such a contrast to how I feel when I'm at school or with friends. Sometimes I wonder if all humans feel the same way, all the humans through all time, or if this is just a modern malady. Yes, cavemen had feelings I'm sure, but did they feel the same kind of stress people today feel? ( Read more... )

I'm keeping track of how I've been feeling about alcohol over the past few days. But it's been hard to really think about it that much. I'm in the last two weeks of school (I'm a teacher) and between tutoring and getting stuff ready for graduation, there isn't time for much else. I've also been packing at night to get ready for my move (also in ( Read more... )

Didn't drink today. Didn't drink yesterday, although I considered it. Instead I got wrangled into babysitting and ended up having a great time with the kids. When I got home, I was so tired I slept fairly easily. Today we had a staff meeting, and then everyone ran home to get dressed for our school's graduation. It went on for 3 hours, odd ( Read more... )

I'm starting this journal because I'm afraid I'm becoming an alcoholic. I don't think anyone from my family or friends knows. I do know that I have spent the last 3 weeks mixing vodka or rum with diet Sprite in the evenings and weekends. I usually get silly, chat online or whatever, maybe talk to someone who has unfortunately called me or been ( Read more... )