Happy 2006, mother fuckers ( Read more... )

Christmas has been krazy fun for me.  And, as I don't want to update a real entry about all my shenanigans and goings-on, here's one of those obnoxious bulleted lists:

• I took Zach to meet Ben at The Lipstick Lounge.  We listened to twin lesbians rock out, and as we left, found out my car was broken into.  The person(s) took my factory stereo, Zach ( Read more... )

At Least the Honduran Children Will Have Slightly Fewer Clothes to Make

We had our meeting on the 11th, and I was right!  The Rivergate Gap will be closing at the end of January.  And for those of you in Nashville, we will be having a liquidation sale.  Case closed!

He's Officially Survived 24 Years

A Side Order of Nagging

Tuesday was my 24th ( Read more... )

So the 'rents are having a get-together (Christians, ya heard of 'em?).  And I was in charge of making a cheesecake that Mom would cut into bite size squares for everyone.  Well, last night I spent three hours making it.  How did it turn out?  I don't know, ask the dog.

So after Clive ate about half of a cheesecake, I went to bed, woke up and came ( Read more... )

It's officially five days until I'm twenty-four.  Nerrrvous?  Hope you've got your shopping done.

So, the family is finally catching up with the world.  The world of two years ago.  We got high speed today from a man wearing a facsimile of the One Ring.  The ads didn't mention it, but look how fast this double anal penetration scene downloads!  ( Read more... )

So here's an exchange that occurred yesterday:

A dramatization in one act.

Damon Xanthopoulos, spritely chap...........a heavily sedated Ashton Kutcher
Jimmy Jimmerson, sandwich artist..................................Jonathan Lipnicki

SCENE:  Goodlettsville Subway Restaurant, present day

Jimmy: What kinda bread you want?
Damon: Wheat.
Jimmy: Wait... ( Read more... )

Happy Thanksgiving!  Let's all give thanks to those white go-getters who toppled their Native American oppressors.  A quote from Jason:  "Happy Thanksgiving, Clive [our dog]!  You know what Thanksgiving is?  It's when Jesus rides a giant turkey handing out food to everyone!"

ClearChannel:  You'll Like It...Or Else

First things first, though.  As ( Read more... )

Apparent Brainstorming Sessions at The Learning Channel

Executive #1: I have this documentary program, but I just need a title.
Executive #2: Whatchya got?
#1: Well, it's a heart-wrenching story about a family coping with the diagnosis of cancer with someone in their immediate family. It's a type of cancer that's attaching itself to the father ( Read more... )

I forgot to mention something when Bethany and Jeff were here.  We were heading to It's Showtime Video here in Goodlettsville and I was saying:

Me: "It's run by Christians, so sometimes they don't have really good movies."
Jeff:  "Is it like Family Video in Arizona?  They have edited versions of films."
Bethany:  "Like what?"
Jeff:  "I don't know, ( Read more... )

Bad news for Ben.  Last night, I fell in love with a man named Booger.

Permit me?

Thank you.

But first.  I told Mom about Ben last night.  Up til now I had been using Marie as an excuse as to where I was going.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going out to eat with Marie."

But the lies were getting a little flimsy.  An example when I had to come up with ( Read more... )