Mal: The polearm is really the state fair version of a weapon. "It's a deep-fat fried sword! On a stick!"

Mal: Okay, before we go to harvest goblin ears I want to visit an otolaryngologist.

erragal: Sure. ...why ( Read more... )

Mal: (at the end of a long haggling session) "I say PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS"... 25!

erragal: Success!

J: I just need to go in and do some standard post-op stuff. You know, weight the animals, rub some antibiotic cream on their heads, lick them... it's weird how IACUC insists we lick the animals after surgery.

C: YOU ARE SO WEIRD

Mal: Wait. We're being attacked by CYLONS from the WALLS?
Chase: Basically, yeah.
Mal: AWESOME.

"When the Pope heard about this, he excommunicated the crusading army. I reiterate, the Pope--who had arranged the fourth crusade in its entirety--excommunicated all participants. Then after he, I dunno, recommunicated them, somebody convinced them to go invade Byzantium first because 'hey, non-Catholic Christians are douchebags, amirite fellas

"Three and one-half centuries of despotism had destroyed the civic virtue that was once the strength of Rome. The ethical degeneration of late Roman society presaged our modern plunge toward secular humanism and moral relativism. Apathy and insolence replaced the patriotism and love of liberty that had motivated the hard men who built that ( Read more... )

Books I read in the year 2009 for pleasure, in chronological order as best I could approximate:
* The Paths of the Dead by Steven Brust +
* The Lord of Castle Black by Steven Brust +
* Sethra Lavode by Steven Brust
* Shaft by Ernest Tidyman
* Molecules of Emotion by Candace B. Pert
* The Scarlet Pimpernel by Baroness Orczy
* Jhegaala by Steven ( Read more... )

Sentences that begin with "Prepare the..." and end with "...of Earth." "Prepare for the..." is also acceptable. Classic examples include:

• "fortification"
• "subjugation
• "harvesting"

Eddi: There's a lever here. I'm gonna pull it. Any objections?

Mal: No, just give me a minute to put my spike-proof hat on.