Mal: Hey, according to this dropdown list I could get "Gorilla Gloves!" That sounds way better than these lame-ass green thumbs!

erragal: You don't care what they do, you just want them because they're gorilla gloves ( Read more... )

Mal: Wait, DEATH?! NOBODY SAID ANYTHING ABOUT FIGHTING DEATH!

James: She doesn't look happy to see us, does she?

Mal: Blue things generally aren't.

Tommy: Instead of broken glass, how about we just make a fireproof kite and attach random torches to it to set other people's kites on fire?
Mal: BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE TOO AWESOME

Mal: Could we get a recap for those members of the party who are attention-span impaired?

You know, someday I'll have to collect the gaming quotes into a memoir titled YOU PROBABLY HAD TO BE THERE: THE COLLECTED WIT AND WISDOM OF JONATHAN EHRICH AND PEOPLE HE HANGS OUT WITH

Mal: Seriously, 4E just sucks all the fun out of D&D! Who the hell thought of this retarded shit!

Just finished reading this. It was muy muy awesome.
( Cut to protect the innocent. )

erragal: (description of costumes at party...)

Mal: Wait a second, this universe has angels with halos and feathered wings? Why isn't anyone dressed like a sexy hound archon?

chesh: One of these days, the gnome is going to wake up with his mouth full of expanding foam.

Mal:: And by "expanding foam," we mean semen. Tiefling semen.