Phone rang at 4 am my time which is unusually early, thought it was just an early morning phone call for work, not realizing it was saturday or thinking it was saturday, and thinking what jerk is calling this early.  was in such a daze, and literally fell back asleep, never  thought in a million years, the news that would befall my ears.  hour or ( Read more... )

So today i am writing...i am working on Nano wri Mo, a writing challenge.  I am starting school in a week.  working on thoughts of my life next year...I know i want to be happy, and what i am doing isnt doing it. i love working for disney and i love going to school...It's time for me to dedicate time to me ;)

I realized today as I was driving to work that you and I are both march babies, and you my dear crossed my mind today. Christina, I miss you. There is some family drama going on, and I guarantee you would be on my side, however, no one is talking to me and I'm not reaching out to them because they are being stupid.  I refuse, it's dumb.  Why do I ( Read more... )

So, we flew to Albuquerque, Rodney and me for Jr's memorial.  WE got there Friday night, and went to Frontier to get our Chili Stew, before we checked in to the hotel. The next morning we met Jonathan, had some breakfast at Little Anitas, and walked around Old Town.  Headed back to the hotel for a blink, and then had to get Ready.  As usual, ( Read more... )

Dad, the last monarch in our family has since passed away, i believe as of today it's been a week.  I dont handle loss well, and this one frankly has me sad, and a little lost.  He was doing better, and then was sick and then better however we know that he missed his Hunny, Mom.  We had tried to go see him but was told that he was coming to CA, my ( Read more... )

So, this saturday, my Aunt Ann passed away.  It must be said that in my life mostly she felt more like my other mom, than my aunt. She had five kids of her own, but growing up i remembered either being at their house or them at our house.  We spent every holiday together, and vacations were usually spent at their house.  I remember swimming in the ( Read more... )

As we approach the new year, i cant say that i am not a little happy to see 2021 leave.  It left us with a hole as we buried my mother in law, and now i am having to relive my own fathers death.  During the transition of my moms supportive care, they misplaced my fathers urn, AND in that, threw it away.  I am more than mortified, im heartbroke.   ( Read more... )

So, in two months, friends, acquaintances, have taken their lives.  I was not incredibly close to either, BUT i had my moments, and perhaps as i type this i feel like i should have made more of a difference, talked about the more important things, but you know meeting people, not being the most popular person, talking about stuff that sometimes isn ( Read more... )

Mom, how has it been 28 years later?.....i feel like i met you yesterday. i still feel like a little girl....so many memories, so much lost...im grateful for the time we had, more than you will ever know....it meant the world to me...to see you, to hug you, to hear you, to love you....and forever you are part of me.....Meeting you was the highlight ( Read more... )

Mom,

You mean more to me than you know... i mean, you were my mom when i married your son, you  were the one who encouraged me to find my mom, you encouraged me to study, and go to meetings, you were so much to me, that i hope you knew...

Thank you Mom, for everything, at some point i know we didnt see things eye to eye, but you always loved me, ( Read more... )