I just had a bee try -four times- to pollinate the two-year-old dried flower circlet on my hat.
My pheromones are roxxorz to failbees.

I'll be going now.
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NYPD officer plotted to kidnap, cook and eat women,

authorities say

"Six-year NYPD veteran Gilberto Valle, 28, who worked in Harlem, was arrested Wednesday by federal officers on a conspiracy to kidnap charge Wednesday. The U.S. Attorney’s office said Valle conspired with multiple, unnamed people “to kidnap, rape, torture, kill, cook and cannibalize ( Read more... )

The other day when I was masturbating, I had a sudden curiosity to view my own cervix. So I went and got a mirror and some salad tongs, and laid back on the bed to do some searching about.
Can you tell me what shapes I should have been looking for? Because, I have to admit, what I was seeing looked nothing like the cervix images I downloaded from ( Read more... )

Gordon Ramsay's Dwarf Porn Double Found Dead in a Badger Den in Wales

No, seriously. Couldn't make this shit up if I tried.
Gawd I love the English.

Beware of bath salts:

From inside Thompson's closed bedroom, "he told them, 'Don't come in, I'm naked,'" Powers told The Gazette. "But they opened the door and he was standing there with his pants down. He had on women's clothing and the goat was dead and there was blood everywhere. It was just a scene."
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"Could we put him in another fucking cell, please?!?"

Click to view

Man dies mysteriously in Houston porn video booth
By DALE LEZON
HOUSTON CHRONICLE
Sept. 29, 2010, 10:16AM

Police are investigating the death of a man whose body was found locked in a video booth at an adult book store on U.S. 59 in northeast Houston the day after he was seen entering the business.

Brodrick S. White, 35, of Houston ( Read more... )

Click to view

...And link this before I go. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3uxTpyCdriY


Kay-kay bye.
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 *reposted from kali_ma's LiveJournal, because it had to be:

Mario Fantasies


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Nation's Nipples Severely Under-Clamped, U.S. Bureau Of Masochism Reports