When the tsunami hit Fukushima all my atheist friends were asking the hack question, "Well if God is so great why does he let earthquakes happen?" But I love to watch their heads explode when I ask a question like, "If science is so great why do I have to worry about radiation?" That’s right I said it. And now go look up the half-life of plutonium- ( Read more... )

Down in the third sub-basement below Mortimer’s castle here at Media Underground, I had just finished a three week investigation on Halo 2 Live. I had some suspicion that the gamer PinkUnicorn12 had hacked into my X-Box game controller and installed a remote program to make me lose every game I played against her and all of her online friends. I ( Read more... )

For his final January 14th show with the Sex Pistols, Johnny Rotten famously exclaimed: "Ever get the feeling you've being cheated?" That's how I feel after watching the movie Nothing But The Truth. I know I shouldn't complain because I get all my movies free off BitTorrent. But for the love of God this movie sucked in so many ways I am unable to ( Read more... )

It’s been a while since I posted anything because I’ve been on a clandestine mission. Mortimer sent me to the US as an embedded reporter. The plan was to infiltrate Blackwater and establish a beach head for information on corporate mercenaries. For six months I trained in a secluded wetland preserve outside North Carolina sleeping inside a cave. I ( Read more... )

I’ve been in somewhat of a mystical bent these past few days asking all kinds of questions on accepted belief systems. I usually start the morning off with a simple theoretical problem. For instance, today I’m thinking about hell. I know everyone says when you die and you go to hell you’re supposed to go to this really hot place forever. Without ( Read more... )

I would just like to say with God as my witness that Glenna Odle is taking an express elevator directly to Heaven. And I bet there are all kinds of different levels in Heaven so she’s probably in the highest level. Glenna spent her whole life in a wheelchair yet she always remained at peace with the world. She never had a cruel thought in her heart ( Read more... )

I’m chatting with a friend about UFOs, The Book of Revelation and Implantable Transponder Chips, it’s just another Sunday afternoon and I stopped in mid sentence thinking of the word transponder. "Hey that sounds familiar. I seem to remember reading something about the transponders being turned off somewhere. Like some kind of switch those sneaky ( Read more... )

The world is filled with retards and we’re all heading toward the apocalypse with a go-cart riding drunken Shriner at the controls. I don’t know when all this started but somebody has to be pulling the strings and whoever it is has got to be one blind ass mutated half-human depraved lunatic ( Read more... )

"Each individual human life exists as an objectively unique and therefore quite individual decision making process."

If I were to believe this I would cease to be unique… I would be a collective member of your Individualist Party.

"In human beings, the biologically based decision making process, like the biological processes of birth and death ( Read more... )

This is what I fucking hate about every Branch Davidian conversation… It’s always an argument about the FBI or what the government did or who shot first or who deserved to die… The fucking point to me is the fact that these people were willing to go the distance with this guy… WHO the fuck was he and WHAT was it he said that made these people from ( Read more... )