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I am that fucked up.
To follow on from the post on depression that is doing the rounds on facebook, I thought you all should know a little about what I deal with. I get the whole depression thing, but I can be fine, and out of the blue the littlest thing can bring my world crashing down. Innocent things get twisted in my brain to the point that my self esteem takes a ( Read more... ) -
Like that she's gone.
Is it really a surprise someone would give up on me? I know I'm screwed up and I know I push, but damnit I have worked so hard to push less, but I was pushed to my limit and she wouldn't listen and now its my fault I had a breakdown and couldn't control all my insecurities. It's always my fault. Now she's gone ( Read more... ) -
Sometimes we blind ourselves...
Interesting conversation with the Mental Health Nurse on Thursday. Aside from her joining the chorus of people telling me to finish this school year, despite me being so far over it is not funny anymore, she told me that I have become so used to anxiety that when I have a normal persons level of high anxiety I don't feel it. So when I do feel ( Read more... ) -
Not knowing what to say
... or do or write or feel ( Read more... ) -
Overwhelmed
I'm feeling so overwhelmed at the moment. There is so much going on and so much I am not getting done and I miss Jamie and I have had no time for me this past week and I just feel so stressed out. I'm tired all the time and over this not being able to sleep properly ( Read more... ) -
The Return: Day Two
So I am back again. I am trying to turn LJ back into a habit again. It's the next morning, just. I'm just chilling in front of the TV while my beautiful girlfriend gets some much needed sleep. Geelong did the world a favour by defeating Collingwood, so I am pretty stoked by that ( Read more... ) -
Hello again LJ world
So here I am, almost one year to the day since my last entry. Still live and kicking. I blame facebook for my absence. I feel like it became easier to just update statuses than to sit down and actually write something of substance (or little to no substance). Anyways I am back, in some part because Tennya (I don't remember how to friend tag) ( Read more... ) -
Trading Cards
I just answered a question on a forum about how my card collecting obsession began... well this is what I answered with.... Maybe ya'll will understand my love of cards a bit better for reading this....
Wow, how many times have I answered this sort of question... I think this question is only half the story, the other half of the story is why do ( Read more... ) -
I should write more.
I haven't written in over a month. That's become the norm. I read my friends posts, but, I just don't feel like putting my life into words ( Read more... ) -
She's back.
Subject says it all really. She's back and it wasn't anything I did, she was just... doing what she had to do, which I did suspect, still... I'm just happy to have her back. Unconditional love is what it is and I shan't hold her actions against her. I didn't even subconsciously try make her feel guilty this time, I just let it be. Growth. I ( Read more... )