it's been quite awhile, but i need to blog where i do not feel censored. my old self creeps up on me in some ways, in others my new self is too aware of it to truly let this happen. i ask myself why, then i ask myself why not? the weather today is all too aligned with my confusion. i'm only confused about who i am and the choices i make. are ( Read more... )

This feels nice. Calm, comfortable, and incredibly pleasant. It's a first for me. There's no crazy passion or intensity or chaos or mixed feelings. It's just incredibly nice. Perhaps this is a reflection of the past five months. This is what I've been working toward. He's so easy to be around. It just kinda flows. And we'll see what ( Read more... )

my head pounds to the point of inducing nausea as my body's way of telling me "fuck you" for poisoning it with gin last night. the part of me that isn't angry at me for indulging feels alive and wonderful and doesn't regret even one drink of last night. unfortunately, alcohol is an effective way to break down all of the defensive walls we put up ( Read more... )

This is a story that was run on NPR, but no other major U.S. national news. The implications of both the story and the fact that nobody ran it are pretty scary.

O'Connor's warning

This episode is banned!
Banned South Park Episode!

just when you think you've got a handle on things, just when you believe you might just have something at least sort of figured out, life throws you another loop, almost as if it's smirking at you in a mockery of your almost arrogance. 17 years go by, and you believe someone had little impact on your life. maybe they didn't. 17 years ago, they ( Read more... )

so there are people that come and go in our lives (i know, blah, blah, blah, let me sound cliche for a sec), and i believe that so many of them help shape us into who we are at the present moment. well one person, who was only part of my life for about a year before telling me to fuck off, shaped who i am today more than anyone else, with the ( Read more... )

It is snowing!!!

A million thoughts and a million emotions run through my being faster than I can really comprehend them. I feel almost anything you could name right now, strange as that is. I've acted in a manner that I claim is uncharacteristic of who I am, but obviously it's not. I don't know if I'm rebelling or just having a good time. I don't regret ( Read more... )

Good quote of last night:
"Hey, I'm ambidextrous too! Sometimes I drink with my left hand and sometimes with my right! And sometimes, I even drink with both. Someone told me recently that I was 'double-fisting'. I was like, 'Whoa! That means something else in England!'"
-a british guy at a bar