Application for Maxim (Girl Genius)

[nize_hat]

((Maxim has a very thick Eastern European derived accent- I apologize if it gets confusing. Maxim is a 'Jägermonster' - they doesn't really have any special 'powers' persay, but have superhuman strength and resiliency as well as highly enhanced senses of smell (and hearing in Maxim's case). His right arm is mechanical, but, doesn't appear to be '

Comments

[vislor_turlough]

"What is it with you and hats?"

[nize_hat]

((Permission was granted for Maxim to boggle over Turlough's short-shorts =D ))

Maxim gave Turlough a once over and a quizzical look- he was really rather oddly dressed- Maxim was not really familiar with short-shorts as a fashion statement. "Vot iz it mit hyu und not vearink pants? Und vere iz dis? It iz not lookink much like Mechanicsburg. . . I dun't tink hy's suppozed to be here. Und am I suppozed to fight hyu?" Turlough didn't look like much of an opponent- being practically nekked and all. At least from the waist down.

[vislor_turlough]

"I'll have you know it's spring, and there's a particularly hot spot that my pet likes to hang out in, and if you fight me I will hex you against that wall."

[nize_hat]

"Vell, iz up to hyu if hyu dun't vant to vear pants or fight, iz no matter. Dat fonny qvill vanted me to fight somebody hy tink, dunno. Vat do hyu mean, 'hex'? Dat sounds like magic." Maxim came from a world of mad science- which wasn't so far off from magic. But, he was nevertheless dubious of this claim, especially since he thought he was still somewhere in his own world.

[iam_beowulf]

Lo, the stuff of bafflement did dizzy a noble Geat. 'Twas monster and warrior in one and the same personage, bedecked in headgear befitting a Hogwarts prefect.

What Beowulf wanted to say was something along the lines of what the Hel are you; what came out was "I AM BEOWULF! I'M HERE TO KILL YOUR MONSTER!"

[nize_hat]

Maxim's hearing was such that he could have discerned the contents of a whisper from the across the room. He winced slightly as Beowulf's unexpected bellow pounded against his eardrums. He spun swiftly towards its source. Why, it could only be some sort of Othar Trygvassen-esque adventurer! This must be who he was supposed to fight! The Geat's usual amount of exposed skin suggested that this was not necessarily a 'Gentleman' Adventurer, like the aforementioned Othar, but this wasn't a detail of any import. What mattered was that here was something that Maxim understood! And this time, he wasn't going to let the adventurer-type talk him into playing hangman. . .

"I AM MAXIM!" he shouted back, although not quite so loudly. "I'M HYUR MONSTER! Hyu can try to kill me- if hyu can!" With no further adieu, a huge, toothy smile, and an enthusiastic "GRRRAH!", Maxim launched himself at the Geat, not even bothering with drawing his sword- Jägers tended to a hands-on approach, when possible. . .

[iam_beowulf]

Beowulf's brawn and Maxim's speed made them very different sorts of fighters, but they shared a common approach: BERSERKER.

"GRRAAAAAH," came Beowulf's roar in answer. In the ensuing grapple, Beowulf's Gryffindor scarf came unknotted from about his brow, and tangled about the horns of his prefect hat.

It was the Sorting Hat's dream match. Hatwearer on Hatwearer!

"THOU ART NO MILF," panted Beowulf between lunges. Collisions and close contact had confirmed for the Geat that Maxim lacked bosoms. This was not the kind of monster for swiving. A Grendel-type rather than a Grendel's-mother type. "WHERE IS THY MOTHER, THAT I MAY SWIVE HER?"

[nize_hat]

((Edited for html fail)

Maxim was indeed lacking any sort of bosom- not that this actually prevented him from looking pretty great in a dress. Which fortunately, he was not wearing, nor did he normally wear one, but his mun smells a potential chocolate plot in the future. "No, Hy'z not a Milf, Hy am a Jägermonster," Maxim told Beowulf, between various smashes and bashes, overturning a chair as he lept to avoid a close swing from the Geat. Between Beowulf's powerful attacks, and Maxim's quickness and frequent use of the furniture as launchpads/shields/bludgeoning devices (furniture was not a 'weapon', so it was perfectly fair in hand-to-hand combat in Maxim's opinion), the Sorting Room was quickly descending into utter disarray. "Vot's a Milf? Are dey goot fighters?" The terminology was unfamiliar to the Jäger, who pictured something rather small and furry, but with lots of teeth and sharp, pointy bits. "Dat's a goot hat hyu got dere, by da way," he commented- even with its Gryffindor scarf wrapping, Beowulf's hat was one that a Jäger

[igorofmalaria]

What was that? Igor stepped into the room to get a better look, when the door swung shut behind him. "Gah!"

Leaning against the door, desperately casual he asked "so...you fight a lot?"
A cattle prod would be nice. Right now. "What, ah, kind of thing do you fight?"

[nize_hat]

Maxim looked Igor over- hunched, pale, clad in black- quite a minion-y looking fellow. He'd met many a minion, serving the Heterodynes- hell, they had cities full of minions. Igor definitely looked like the sort who could deliver a particularly good "Yes, Master!" while pulling a large switch. Perhaps he'd have some sensible answers regarding his situation

[igorofmalaria]

"Jagermonsters? The Masters? Wait, you're a monster? Some kind of super-soldier?" He grinned, forgetting to be scared for a moment as he looked up at Maxim's very sharp teeth and wondered what the bitemark pattern would look like. "Oh, yes-" but wait, it might be best to answer this guy's question first.

"I'm Igor. I've never heard of Baron Wulfenbach and I don't think he's here at Hogwarts. I used to work for a Doctor Glickenstein." Igor doubted they were from the same world, since most monsters weren't so eloquent in his own world and didn't wear such sophisticated hats, but it couldn't hurt to ask. "Have you heard of Malaria? That's my country. There are lots of people who were taken from different places and times here."

[nize_hat]

"Yah, a super-soldier, dat's me," Maxim agreed, giving Igor an overly toothy grin. "Most peeple know vat ve are, vat mit all de terrorizink for de old Heterodynes back in de day." That such an obvious minion-type didn't seem familiar with Jägers was a little worrisome- the part of Europe he'd been in moments prior knew Jägers quite well. It would have been hard for anyone in that region to have been unfamiliar with Baron Wulfenbach, too- skilled tyrants were generally hard to miss. Maxim was beginning to wonder if he really had found himself at some sort of magic school. . .

"No, Hy's dun't know a place called Malaria, only de malaria dizease. Vot do hyu mean, by different places und times? Iz dis really a magic school? Und vere iz dis, und vat country are ve in?" He hoped that the answer wouldn't be too far away from Miss Agatha. . .

[sada_chan]

Ooooh, this one might be fun. Sadako assumed her most pleasing aspect (giving off only a faint whiff of brine) and smiled demurely.

"You must be very strong."

[nize_hat]

A girl! Albeit one who reeked of fish- even the faint scent of brine was extremely pungent to the Jäger's heightened sense of smell. "Yah, Hy'z strong," Maxim confirmed, and gave Sadako his most dashing smile. Even if she was the smelly minion of some unknown spark, who might or might not be a rival to his Miss Agatha, a girl was a girl, and Maxim was a flirt. "Are hyu needink a strong guy? Hy might kin help. . .but vy do hyu smell like fish? Are ve near de ocean?" Maybe she'd just been swimming. . .

[sada_chan]

"I come from a fishing village," she said, feigning shyness and slight embarrassment. "It makes me feel safe when I have a strong man close."

It might be fun to play this game again.

[nize_hat]

"Den it's a goot ting hyu met me, yez? Hy's Maxim, iz always nice to meet de pretty gorls like hyu." Although Maxim was starting to think that he really had been transported to some unfamiliar place, he wasn't about to let his better sensibilities get in the way of flirting with a pretty girl. There was never a bad time for this! "So, vat do gorls like to do at. . .verever dis is? Hyu gots any goot barfights?" Yes, Maxim was contemplating asking Sadako out to a random barfight, whenever his schedule might allow- technically, his first priority on getting out of the building would be escape back to his Jäger 'brothers' and Miss Agatha. But, it couldn't hurt to have a few possibilities lined up in case that didn't occur in a timely fashion. . .or so Maxim thought. Thinking just wasn't his strongest point.

[noseymaddie]

Only because picking this aspect is amusing.

"You'd harass all the girls in the Order of the Phoenix?" Maddie asked, obviously disgusted. "What woman would want to give you the time of day?"

If it weren't for the accent, she'd call him a Yank.

[nize_hat]

"Most of dem?" Maxim ventured, looking Maddie over- a bit oddly dressed perhaps, but, girls were girls, and, Maddie was definitely one of those! Maddie's disgust was of course interpreted by the Jäger as playing hard-to-get, and he gave her a toothy smile.

[noseymaddie]

Hard to get? Oh, dear, this will go badly quickly, won't it?

And, that smile...oh, my...the horrors, the nightmares...

Maddie made a face of disgusts and revulsion. "What makes you think they'd want you?" she asked. Given half a prompting, she'd list his faults just off this short a meeting.

The mun half dares you.

[nize_hat]

Maxim wasn't daunted by Maddie's disgust- this meant a challenge, and just made it all the more amusing to try his self-proclaimed charms upon her. Oddly enough, in his own world, Maxim's luck with the ladies could have been worse- possibly since Jägers were pretty much the incarnation of 'bad boys'. But, his own opinion of his charm was definitely rather overinflated- he was certainly good-looking as Jägers went (and knew it all too well) but, he was still a Jäger. This was indeed bound to go quite badly, and of course Maxim's mun thinks this is hilarious!

"Vell, vy vouldn't dey?" The mun of course can't resist the dare. The smile grew even more impossibly wide and toothy as Maxim adjusted his hat to a somewhat more rakish angle. "Hyu look like hyu's neffer met anyvun zo handsome as me before," Maxim quipped. "Dun't vorry, Hy's not goink to bite."