I found him. I found the man I want. And he wants nothing to do with me.

He looked better yesterday than he has in months. He was very nice to be around and to talk to and very responsive to me. Such is how he is with most people, most of the time ( Read more... )

Pretty much everything has returned to normal. Not everything of course, but one can't hope for too much really. It's a teet-totter these days, as far as where things are going. It's as though my feet are back on the ground but it's a new ground. My feet feel different to it. The world seems to turn beneath me just ever so much faster these ( Read more... )

Nothing has worked out.  For some reason- one that must be in inherent in who I am and therefore inexcapable, he can not stand me.  Now he likes someone else.  I can see it in front of me everyday.  Lilke bleach to any open wound.  One that is my chest.  I've never been heart broken before.  I am terribly so now.  More so two weeks ago ( Read more... )

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Sometime in the last week I decided that what I want, I really want.  Therefore, I am going to begin steps to start sleeping with a certain man of interest.  Seduction is overrated and it conotates a sort of short- term affair that is superfluous and callice and I therefore have no interest in a such an occasion.  What I want is for this man to be ( Read more... )

For the last two months, I've been coming closer to the man I want but its going so slow, which is also somehting I wanted although I had hoped that things would have picked up by now, and they have not, to where I don't know how much I want it anymore, because most of all that I've had is longing- alone, all by myself longing for someone I barely ( Read more... )

Things are going quite well with my special guy friend.  He clearly is interested in me, and not in any bad way.  It's quite terriffic, we're growing to be friends.  That alone is nice.  But, we are both far too much physical people for us to simply be friends- that is highly improbable at this time.  But, things are going nicely.

Seeing you, working with you tonight was fun.  When you laughed incredibly hard at that joke I made about Men In Black, that was the highlight of my day- by far.  I miss you already- I'm such a pussy.  Please come over to my place tomorrow with the few who are coming over, I would love that.  I can't wait for you to know where I live and to see you ( Read more... )

Dear Devin ( Read more... )