Friday was Bingo Night at Jefferson Elementary School. They are doing extensive remodeling so the event was held in the gym with not nearly enough tables and chairs and a sound system which was made up of one microphone component the size of a gumball held to the lips by a string. So you couldn't hear, plus you couldn't see because you were ( Read more... )

I called my grandmother last night. We seem to have an unspoken arrangement that I call just so often. When I call too soon, she sounds confused and wonders what my story is. When I take too long, I get the whole "Oh, I haven't heard from you in a while. You must be busy" routine. Frequently I go "9:30! SHIT!" and it's too late to call. I'll ( Read more... )

I inserted vast amounts of coffee this morning, squinted at the $25,000 Pyramid to get my self in gear, loaded the car with various foodstuffs and drove up to Camano Island this morning. It took three trips with my arms completely full to bring in all the Sunny Delight, polish sausage and maple syrup and naturally I was compelled to tally the ( Read more... )

I am starving to death ( Read more... )

Please, do come in. Have a seat on the chair of your choosing and join me in the indulgence of a silver goblet of our house wine- Powerade Zero Mixed Berry. It includes not only electrolytes and healthful aqua food coloring but also a smattering of B vitamins which shall fill you with pleasure and vigor and satiety. It will be the highlight of ( Read more... )

I'm mailing the Christmas cards, yo. If you got a Thanksgiving card, I have your address and you can be smug in the knowledge that a card will be coming your way without further ado. If you didn't get a Thanksgiving card, I don't have your address or failed miserably to be thankful for you this year. Assume it's the former. I will send cards to ( Read more... )

I have a vague memory of being very small and having to go to a special day care for one day because I was sick and couldn't go to my regular day care. It was a sick kids only day care. The lady said that I could play with these puzzles. "There are puzzles," she told me. I took a nap. I woke up and asked if I could play with the puzzles. She ( Read more... )

"For only one dollar extra you can get a green salad," she said with optimism ( Read more... )

Twenty five years or so ago Pine Lake and the surrounding Issaquah area was a rustic quaint nowhere kind of place. Now it has mansions on it and Little Caesars and property taxes and who knows what all. Where there was once a general store with plank floors there is now a Circle K. At least, that's what I've heard ( Read more... )

Today was Sunday; Jaden and I rolled out of bed at the same late hour, both of us with terrible hair. Chad and Paulina and Cadbury were at yet another damn bicycle race and they came home around lunchtime and we hit the old fence with a sledgehammer until it all fell down and then we realized we have to put up a retaining wall for part of the ( Read more... )