From dogster ( Read more... )

Damn dog! You'd better stop acting like no one has taught you anything or else it's OFF YOU GO!! What? Me teach him things? Well, I do when I feel like it, but why isn't he a better dog? He's so rude!! AND OMGZ ALPHA FOR TEH WIN!!1!!

Just so everyone knows, the pit bull breeder who alpha rolls boxes? Most of his dogs were taken away. He killed one of them by keeping it in his garage for 10 hours with no ventalation and it overheated (I posted it in stupidpetowners, I was too pissed off to snark when it was posted. Right now, I'm too lazy to link it)
Anyways, animal control was ( Read more... )

Oh Noes!  My cat pees on my couch, so I rub her nose in it, smack her, and yell at her for it!

We all know that this IS the best way to discipline a cat.  Someone told me to!

And here ladies and gentlemen, we have yet ANOTHER alpha roll!!

The stupid... it hurts.

Yes, the solution is to alpha roll the great dane, how DARE he growl when you try to push him off the couch. The damn dog should KNOW you are the boss, push him to the ground and hold him on his back! Growl back at him, hold his jaws shut. It doesn't matter that your dog outweights you by a significant amount, you MUST show him who is boss. It ( Read more... )

http://www.auspet.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=13021Read more... )

My dog is food aggressive since I started feeding her real food. Can you help? Last time she growled, I gave her a good scruff shake and an alpha roll. I sure hope she rips my face off! I mean, I'm working hard on teaching her that I'm the bad guy, that growling in unacceptable (y'know, so she'll bite without warning), and that I want to steal away ( Read more... )

( Oh Noessss! Alpha ROLL!! )

But silverblaidd asked, so maybe I can get away with it. I can also put it elsewhere and/or delete if you think it's horrible of me, but...

( The Monks on Alpha Rolls, take two. )

Yes, the ever regrettable Monks of New Skete are a fabulous reference and guide to gaining knowledge on dog behavior and training.  I especially like how you labeled them as "ethologists and canine behaviorists."

They are in fact so knowledgeable that the Monks who authored "How to Be Your Dog's Best Friend" have publicly retracted a number ( Read more... )