chistopher and i broke up and SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much has changed

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rip my heart out
spit on it
stomp on it
tear it in a million little pieces
give me all the love you have

thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
im dead, forever

i have to go to work soon, mickey dsssssss. wooooooo. i couldnt stand being broke anymore, so i work with my cousin. im trying to get stoned but i cant pack out of this vile, because there is barely enough to pack hitters with. im fucking depressed, stressed, and pissed off. i really hope christopher isn't just staying with me for a place to live ( Read more... )

of course i write in this again, when i feel like a piece of shit and hurt. i hate this feeling and i do not understand why i have to resort to this journal on the web. why cant i have someone there who honestly wants to listen to me and actually listen and respond with meaning. why do i tell you over and over again how horrible it makes me feel ( Read more... )

i really do not know where to start when i write this entry. i thought that i wanted to be with chris, now all i find myself is thinking about sam. i am a fuck up and i do not know what the fuck to doooooooo!!!!!!!!!!! a lot of people have told me that "i cant be with the same person my whole life and i need to give others a chance", but why in the ( Read more... )

i havent used this thing in a long time. its really crazy, i just read all my old entries but now i am going to write in here again. good day for now.

today is the 20th, which means its sam and i's anniversary. i just wish i was actually his girlfriend and i could be happy about today. we are going to tanners orchard today though..i guess thats neat. it will be fun, but i have a feeling im going to be crying all day. i wish i werent such a fuck up, i wish i would have known better.

i love icc
i love school
i know im weird
i love my bestfriend
i love samuel matthew scronce with everything in me
i am marrying that boy someday
he is so so so so so beautiful
im staying with him tonight
i love sleeping in his arms
he told me to find someone to date, so waiting to go back out would go faster
does he think im retarded? i know he was testing ( Read more... )

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