Reincarnation Part Four
Reese--Change of Plans
John had been in and out of it for days. Finch was never far away from his bedside. Only once when he had heard Shaw telling Harold to go get some decent sleep that she would watch John for a while, did Harold ever leave for any length of time.
John had been lightly sleeping without medicinal aid, no longer wanting sedatives to help him rest, when he felt Harold sit beside the bed once more. John kept his eyes closed as Harold took his hand and quietly confessed.
“I’m so sorry John. If I could do anything to change what happened to Joss, if it was in my power, I would make it so. But, I can’t. All I can do is help you get through losing her, if you’ll let me, as your friend. That’s all we can be now, maybe that's all we should have been. I still love you John. I always will.”
Harold had finally told him what he’d wanted to hear all along, only there had been goodbyes in those anguish filled words. Finch had thought John had fallen in love with Carter.
Everyday Harold was there as John got better, trying to be the supportive friend. He would catch Finch looking at him with such heartache and sorrow and it was tearing John up in side. That’s why John had left so abruptly without a word. He couldn’t bear to see this special, wonderful man hurting anymore because of him.
John threw back the covers in frustration. He’d left without a goodbye hoping Finch would just give up and forget about him, but Harold still sent Fusco to check on him.
“Damn it! Why can’t you just forget about me? I’m not worth it, Finch.”
John dressed in a dry set of clothes, threw the rest of his belongings, damp clothes and all, in his old army duffel and tossed it on the bed, determined to leave again without a word, only this time go where Finch or even The Machine itself wouldn't be able to track him down.
He was sitting in the room's only chair trying to pull on one his still soggy boots, when someone started pounding on the door. Instinct had Reese reaching behind his back for the gun that was no longer hidden there; he'd left all of them behind when he'd fled New York. John pulled the three inch knife out of its sheath in the boot he'd just dropped going for his non-existent gun and crept the few feet over to the door.
John yanked it open and flashed the knife menacingly after he saw it was only Fusco through the door's peephole.
“What? Are you threatening your friends with knives now?” Fusco jumped back eyeing the knife.
“What do you want now Lionel? I'm not really dressed to go another round with you.” Reese grumbled trying to sound irritated at the interruption. John moved back from the door though motioning the detective inside and tossing the knife on the chair he had been sitting in. Reese really didn’t want any passer-by to call the police on them again.
Fusco cautiously entered John's room and closed the door behind him. “Well you look like you're dressed to me.” Fusco popped off noticing John's completely clothed state minus one boot. “No. I didn't come here to go another round with you. Look, I just wanted to tell you I'm headed back to New York. I'm leaving for the airport in an hour. Glasses paid for two tickets. I think he was hoping you'd want to come home but...” Lionel looked at the duffle tossed on the bed and the partial opened bureau drawers.
“You're taking off again, aren't you? You son-of-a-bitch!”
“Look, I don't know what's going on with you and I really don't give a damn. But I do about Four-eyes. He doesn’t deserve this crap.”
John grabbed Fusco by the jacket front and growled down at him, “His name is Finch or Harold; you call him Four-eyes or Glasses again....” John shoved the detective away from him and then turned away. “Yeah, I'm taking off again. Go home Lionel.”
Fusco straightened his coat collecting himself before continuing, “Harold doesn’t deserve this crap. I was there, remember? I know what he did to find you and then take care of you when you tried to kill yourself going after Simmons. You think Shaw was the only one who had to drag him away from your bedside?
Fusco raised his voice, close to shouting this time. “I was with him when we walked into that room to find that bed empty and you gone. I saw what it did to him. Harold's lost without you. It's like he's put everything on hold waiting on you to come back.”
“You want to run away, pretend you don't care, you go ahead. You don't deserve someone who loves you like Harold does. I just pray he doesn't do anything stupid when he figure's it out you ain't comin' back.”
Fusco tried to calm down enough to reason with John. “Look Carter loved you Reese. I was her partner remember? So maybe I know a little something about how she felt. We talked, you know? She knew who your heart belonged to. She knew she could only love you as a friend.”
Fusco watched John stiffen his shoulders but continued on, “So if you're doing all this because you think you lost the love of your life and it's your fault, you're wrong. What happened wasn't your fault and you lost a...friend...who loved you. You haven't lost the person who is in love with you. Not yet. Just don't wait too long. I'll leave this if you change your mind.”
With that Fusco placed an airline ticket on the dresser and slipped out the door.
“I know Lionel, I realize that now.” John confessed to the now empty room. “I know who loves me and I can't keep hurting him.”
Even more determined to leave, John picked up the boot he dropped and the knife off the chair, slipping it into its sheath, before he dropped himself back in the chair and shoved his foot into the boot. He was getting ready to walk out the door when something Fusco had said stopped him cold. Harold wouldn't really do something stupid. He keeps telling himself that, but it didn't stop the fear clenching his gut that Finch had done just that.
John grabbed the ticket and shoved it in his coat.
@@@
Lionel was only faintly surprised to see Reese sitting in the passenger seat of the rental car. “What no backseat this time?” Lionel taunted, thinking about the other times Reese was in a car with him.
"Shut up and drive Lionel!”
~*~
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Epilogue