so last night I found out de was having sex with the firefighter dude up in jersey. he was the guy who tried to be the "telephone badass". I don't know how that makes me feel. you don't want to think about someone you love ever doing that with someone else, obviously. the issue I have with it is that she wrote that she did it somewhere where she ( Read more... )

maybe joe is right. ya see, last thursday he said he looked at my ex's myspace page.. he mentioned something about me not being in her "top friends" list.. I said yeah.. then he said something that I don't know if I should be offended over or not, he said something about how she must have meant more to me than I did to her.. and that I probably ( Read more... )

I realized something while I was riding on the way home. I lectured de a lot. something that I don't feel like I should have done now. sometimes it felt like dealing with a kid though. oh well, shit happens I guess. just a mistake that I made then

so joe and I had a party last saturday for his birthday.. about 20 something people were there.. small crowd but most of them were friends which is actually way more ideal. johnny was being pretty annoying. the way he picks up chicks is to basically be overly persistant and even a little intimidating hoping they'll just give in. I was talking to ( Read more... )

ah, I'm in a weird mood. woke up at 1 am not being able to sleep. I used to put myself in moods like this just by thinking about how I think. I'd end up getting onto something that would make me take a few steps back, so to speak, and then I'd get too focused on the thought, isolating myself from people until I felt a resolve from it. I thought ( Read more... )

today blew, but only in the literal sense. I threw up from the heat. it sucked, but before that I was cleaning out a house. I started thinking about how I think. in turn I wondered if I'm the person I need to be. it's a reoccurring consideration. then my mind wandered to de. I'm comfortable with the way things are between me and her right now. we' ( Read more... )

I should have never moved in with de's parents. I should have found some way to find somewhere else to live. even though, really, I had no where to go. everything negative that happened in the house also reflected against her image of me. it's inevitable. it's like when you take a girl to a funny movie, she relates the joy and good time back to you ( Read more... )

I just went to get my wiener checked out, took a half day off work to go. so I'm walking up to the place, first thing I noticed was some girls in there.. one was making eye contact the whole time I walked up there. when I walked in she was still looking. I just smiled at her. a really good looking chick. as she walked out I thought to myself, " ( Read more... )

so.. I can't sleep for someone else's reasons this time. my buddies g/f found out he had sex with someone else while they were on a break for a week and a half. I heard her from the other room saying "how could you do that if I meant anything to you".. she even cornered me and tried to get info out of me. I, of course, threw my hands up in the air ( Read more... )

so joe may be having a kid.. and there's some shady business going on around his g/f.. who doesn't know. that's probably all I need to say about that. I don't understand how someone can do that. relationships are obviously about trust. if I can't be completely honest with someone then I don't want to be with them. it's easy to lie and manipulate ( Read more... )